Husbands not come home - not answering phone

[unicornpoopoop]

Husband went out last night. Still not home. Not answering his phone or texts. Now what? Just wait and get increasingly stressed out/pissed off...?

[myoriginal3]

That's shit of him if he's just stayed out. Hopefully you can give him a telling off soon

[Motorheadmum]

Oh no, hope he's home soon, I'm sure he will just have stayed at a friends house.

[MagicChicken]

He can be thoughtless and stay out later than planned without letting
Me know but this is a new low for him.

There's your answer then. The more he does this the easier it becomes to one day just not come home at all. And the phones are always 'dead' because they fear the backlash and don't want to have to listen to it until they are ready. and they need time to get their story together.

Personally I don't like the sound of a man with children and a wife at home who wants to go out clubbing with his mates ON BOXING DAY.

Christmas with your family is only two days long as it is, but it's obviously one day too long for him.

[KeptOnRaining]

I'm sorry. It's really stressful when you aren't sure whether to be worried (hurt), pissed off (arrested/at a mates) or completely distraught (another woman). I hope you at least find out which soon, then you can decide what to do about it.

[FetchezLaVache]

What time is playdate friend arriving? Can you ring the parents and ask if you could pick him/her up instead? You soooooo need to be out when he finally rolls in.

[LagunaBubbles]

Ive been there. Thankfully not now, the problem with trying to carry on your day, at least it was for me, was the pit of anxiety in my stomach that he had been with another woman. Its horrible.

[cauliflowercheese14]

I hope he's stayed at a friend's house too but it is massively irresponsible of him and especially not to take the responsibility to text. What if you needed him home as a child was ill or something? I bet you wouldn't dream of behaving like this.

My dh goes out with friends once a month or so, he would never miss the last train home and if he did he'd pay £££ for a taxi to make sure he did get home. We also have the location thing on our iPhones so we can see where the other person is. (Not for everyone I know but helpful to see whether he's on his way home.) I would be furious if he stayed out all night and frantic with anxiety if he didn't even contact me. I trust him entirely but as a grown man with a wife and kids he has a responsibility to get himself home in case they need him, unless otherwise arranged.

[mummypig14]

The amount of times I've been out, got too drunk/been having too much fun and just thought fuck it and stayed at a friends. My DP is the last thing on my mind. If I know the DC are fine then i wouldn't think to text him as it might wake him/them up.

Odds of this increase if cabs are expensive (as they would be on boxing day).

Make it clear he needs to tell you where he is next time and try and ignore the posters trying to insinuate he's gone home with someone.... if he'd stayed at a random woman's house, I highly doubt he'd stick around until 11.00am!! Crashing on a mates sofa, it's likely none of them are awake yet.

I hope he has just fallen asleep and is safe!

[unicornpoopoop]

Friend should be here within an hour. Knowing my luck though, we'll still be home before him....

He really is an inconsiderate twat isn't he...

All he's been going on about for a week is making this the best xmas ever for me and making a huge effort to make me happy... Well that lasted long

[unicornpoopoop]

Mummypig - i did think it would be a bit long to hang around with some random woman so I hope you're right

I've got a feeling the later it gets, the more he won't dare call me

[blueskyinmarch]

What a thoughtless bastard. I am guessing he crashed out with a mate and has now realised he is in deep shit and isn’t getting in contact for that reason.

[WhereYouLeftIt]

^"He can be thoughtless and stay out later than planned without letting
Me know but this is a new low for him."^
Well there's you answer . It is not new behaviour but a ramping up of established behaviour.

I agree with other posters. Postpone the playdate, go out and do not be in when he gets back. Do not answer your phone to him. If you can, arrange to visit family for a few days.

[FetchezLaVache]

All he's been going on about for a week is making this the best xmas ever for me and making a huge effort to make me happy...

Ha! He hasn't exactly suited actions to words, has he?

He'll have to ring/come home eventually, won't he - he's really not helping himself!

[Kr1stina]

He's waiting until your visitors arrive so he can some home and not get into trouble.

He might even roll up with some sweets for visiting kids so everyone can see he's the best dad ever

[Kr1stina]

come home

[KenDoddsDadsDog]

Hope he's ok OP

[unicornpoopoop]

Yeah I'm going to feel awful if somethings actually happened to him

[OohhThatsMe]

If something bad had happened to him, you would know by now, OP.

I'm really sorry but my money would be on him being with a woman.

[unicornpoopoop]

To be honest, even if he rolls in and tells me he slept at a friends, I'm not going to believe him now.

[NicknameUsed]

"The amount of times I've been out, got too drunk/been having too much fun and just thought fuck it and stayed at a friends. My DP is the last thing on my mind. If I know the DC are fine then i wouldn't think to text him as it might wake him/them up"

. I have never done that to my husband and he has never done that to me. It is thoughtless, selfish and rather childish.

OP - I hope your husband is OK.

[crazydoglady6867]

I would say if there is a chance he could be with a woman you would know he was like that. If I were you I would ring the police and ask for help, unless deep down you know what he is capable of, if that is the case then you need to ask him to sort himself out on his return or you will be off and taking the children with you. Self respect is as important as respect from others.

[Chocolate123]

My ex husband done this. That's why he's my ex. Hope you get an explanation soon OP. It's horrible.

[Littleballerina]

Might be worth calling police and hospital just in case.

[Thingscanonlygetbetter41]

I'd be suspicious to, even more so if he doesn't have form for this. It's shitty behaviour to not even send a text saying where he is , what if there was some kind of emergency and you needed him.