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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Another day, still a bastard!

137 replies

FuckDaddyPig · 26/12/2016 08:58

I was woken up this morning by my DP asking me what the time was my answer "I dont know' just opening my eyes about to reach for my phone (eyes still closed) then I hear him say 'forget it ill just go all the way downstairs to find out'.
Me- ' its ok wait there, its half 8'.
He walks out with our baby ( me not realising WW3 has started in his head), and downstairs to make a bottle. I follow him (im awake now) I start to clean up (Christmas bomb site) my DD comes down, so I start to talk to her about Christmas, can hear him in the kitchen mumbling something. Then comes into the front room and asks me why 'I didn't tell him the time, and I always say I dont know and it pisses him off' he says.
Me- Oh ok im sorry I hadn't opened my eyes yet, so my first response was to say I dont know (whilst reaching for my phone).

Well I guess that's not good enough as he walked off calling me a "fucking cunt" and usual other names. My DD is helping me tidy whilst listening to this. I just apologised to her and carried on him still in the kitchen mumbling away obscenities towards me. I ignore and carry on though now im shaking like a crazy person. (He went back to bed) he will probably not come to my mums for boxing day dinner and I have to explain to people why, this will just make him look like an even more horrible man to everyone than already!
We had a great day yesterday. Well everyone else did mine was busy I dont think I sat down once Hmm.
Then today he wakes up in this foup mood, and he says its because I didn't telp him the time?!

Does that sound normal to you?
It sounds batshit to me?
I know the real reason he is pissed off because he was woken up by our DD again. His thoughts are he expects a lie in. Personally I cant remember the last time I layed in (3kids) Confused I leave him in bed most mornings as im taking the kids to school, he sometimes goes back to bed during the day time for hours.

I dont even know why im writing this. Im just hurt, shaky and confused. We have a great day then wake up to Mr Hyde Sad

OP posts:
CalmItKermitt · 26/12/2016 14:32

It reads rather as if you think that in order to finish the relationship, HE has to "get" why, and agree he's wrong.

He'll never get it. He's an arsehole. You know it. We know it. He'll never agree. Just dump him anyway.

Original poster
FuckDaddyPig · 26/12/2016 14:40

Refusing to let me leave. Saying he cant believe im doing this on boxing day. Saying sorry he still loves me. Now my DD is crying saying she's going to miss daddy.

OP posts:
tiej · 26/12/2016 14:43

He can't stop you from leaving. It's a police matter if he gets physical.

Costacoffeeplease · 26/12/2016 14:46

Call the police if he's stopping you from leaving

AnyFucker · 26/12/2016 14:48

Op, I suggest you stop updating MN and get on with actually doing something to improve your children's lives.

Original poster
FuckDaddyPig · 26/12/2016 14:49

Its all the words saying im taking his kids and away on boxing day

OP posts:
AnImfiniteOceanOfLight · 26/12/2016 14:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
FuckDaddyPig · 26/12/2016 14:50

Ok im out. Sorry anyfucker I have noone else to update and help me through!

OP posts:
Costacoffeeplease · 26/12/2016 14:50

Why should you stay and subject them to his behaviour? It doesn't matter if it's Boxing Day or a normal Monday. His behaviour, his choice, now you're making your choice

Chops2016 · 26/12/2016 14:53

Bollocks to him just leave anyway. He's escalating the situation ad your DD will be calmer at your mum's without all the drama. Ignore his attempts to manipulate you.

Maybe the penny has dropped and he's finally realised he needs you a lot more than you need him... panic mode.

AnImfiniteOceanOfLight · 26/12/2016 14:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tiej · 26/12/2016 14:55

I've never met him and I hate him.

AnyFucker · 26/12/2016 14:59

Just leave and stop engaging with him. You have been advised many, many times that it is futile.

Another day, another futile fucked up to and fro all while your childten look on

You are both damaging them. Him because he is abusive. You because you still think if you find the right words, if you swallow enough shit, that he will change.

Don't get the hump with me. When you are truly ready to leave, you will go. The words of one MN'ER would not cause you to say "I am out" if you believed in your own heart it was best for your family.

Until then, it seems you will continue to play out this dysfunction. Your bar is far, far too low. He is lazy, disrespectful, abusive and a fucking shit excuse for a father. He will not change.

Mfr14 · 26/12/2016 15:08

FDP you've posted a few times about this man's awful behaviour. He always sounds like a spoiled brat who has absolutely no respect for you.
The name calling he always does is just disgusting. You should never let anyone speak to you like that. Please just think what that is teaching your daughter!

Please get rid of this abusive man-child!!

BlueFolly · 26/12/2016 15:28

It's good that you've told him it's over. He's a grown man, he can sort himself out somewhere to sleep in the next day or two, never mind giving him 2 months, that's ridiculous.

FantasticButtocks · 26/12/2016 15:45

When you said I am out did you mean that you have managed to leave the house?

Don't know where 'two months notice' has come from, but it's bollocks. He doesn't need any notice whatsoever. He is being abusive and he has to be gone by the end of today. Not for one more moment does he get to live under the same roof as you and the dcs.

If you are still in the house and he is physically stopping you from leaving the house - call the police and have him removed.

He can't believe you're doing this to him on Boxing Day? But it's ok to abuse your partner on Boxing Day? Righty-ho - he just sounds so stupid.

AnyFucker · 26/12/2016 15:47

I took "I am out" to mean "I am leaving the thread"

notapizzaeater · 26/12/2016 15:56

He's lost the right to actually have an option here ! I'd get the police to remove him if he continues.

tiej · 26/12/2016 16:01

Sometimes a thread comes along that makes me glad I'm stroppy.

Wish I could pass on a bit.

Original poster
FuckDaddyPig · 26/12/2016 16:09

I meant im out.of the house. Sorry anyfucker didn't mean to come across pissed off. Im not at all I value all opinions of eveybody xx

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 26/12/2016 16:14

No, my apologies, FDP.

I took your response the wrong way. My mistake and I would like to withdraw my harsh reply to it. Flowers

Thattimeofyearagain · 26/12/2016 16:21

Are you safe op ?

Original poster
FuckDaddyPig · 26/12/2016 16:22

I actually quite like your response Grin
It was totally true Chocolate

OP posts:
Original poster
FuckDaddyPig · 26/12/2016 16:23

I'm at my mums.... with the children

OP posts:
Carollocking · 26/12/2016 17:51

2 hours lol makes me laugh,I do and I'm sure you do more than him. Before he crawls out bed in a morning. Bye bye retard would be my answer next 2 hours he's out id be changing the locks and his crap on the pavement. And good riddance