Fresh eyes please on this

[Messedupmethinks]

2 year old toddler away from mummy for a week including xmas

You don't have to do this if you don't want to. I wouldn't.

Thank you well err, you are conferming what I know from the child's point of view.
His family are loving so no worries there , even still toddler hardly knows them.
The child's father will of told them I'm fine with it
We are very off and on in regards to our relationship.

A week would be too long for my two yo. He's never done an overnight without me either. I want to try it some time to see how he copes but that would be one night. I have similar response from ex who is dismissive about likelihood of DC being upset

I didn't agree . I didn't mind child going for xmas like I said.

Assuming his father is a functioning adult, I don't think a week with his own father is too long, no. Why do you think it is?

I'm sure my toddler will be fine for a few days cos he will be fussed over etc . It's just after a few days he will want to see me as I will want to see my child.
He is about 150 miles or so .

I think it's that a week is too long for you.

Pitish: child's father has things to do he has taken child to his parents (grandparents and other family members

Yes...and?
If you leave your child with your parents and/or family is that ok?

I wouldn't mind if toddler stayed with his dad , that is not the case here. And regardless at that age a week is still to long

Pictish: no , it's just me and siblings. I'm not selfish or immature like that

I have no family or support

So they barely know him, or him them, and your on/off partner has just dropped him off there and buggered off?

And did this all without you actually agreeing?

And you're not furious and driving there to take him home?

Are we missing something, OP?

You could make this a lot easier for us by just telling us what's going on you know.

So your toddler will be away from you and his siblings on Xmas day? Seems cruel to me. If you know his family call them and make alternative arrangements that you are happy with

Your posts are coming across as disordered and vague. Is that on purpose, or is it a general reflection of how you're feeling at the moment?

Because I can't imagine being calm and composed, AND doubting myself over this enough to need others' opinions. Does your DP generally ignore your wishes and feelings?

A week away from a primary caregiver at this age could be destressed up for a child aged 2

How distressful will depend on a few thing, who the child will be cared by. How often the child is away at other times from the main caregiver. How the nature of the child is.

Will the child be able to speak to the main caregiver, hear Thier voice, see them through facetime or similar.

The family know him as when he was a baby he would visit maybe once a week or every couple of weeks.
I'm not furious with him , I'm waiting to see if he thinks about his actions towards me as baby's mother. He may well bring toddler back sooner.
It's pointless making a fuss as it's only been since yesterday

Ivykaty: will be remember me ok after all that time

I'd never do it. A week is far far too long. You need to understand that your child will only understand that you've abandoned it, which is terrifying. Look up attachment theory. It's an appealing idea and will have long term implications for you and your child.

Toddler hasn't seen them for last year . Just the once about 3 weeks ago for a few hours

How has this actually come about and why have you agreed to it? Are you actually still with the Father? Does he have regular contact with the child?

Eye : I certainly understand that
His dad doesn't; this is my problem

Yes toddler knows father well, they do get on well and have fun.
I didn't agree to it

I'm trying to get a clear picture of this but it's hard. Are you and the Dad together? Did he say he was taking the toddler for a couple of days then back to you for Christmas and now he's saying he won't bring him back? If you are together can you join them? Did you agree to this arrangement and now you're getting cold feet?