DRY 16

[vxa2]

If you're quitting alcohol for a brighter sober future come and join us here. A very welcoming bunch supporting each other every step of the way.

Link to Dry 15

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2726334-Dry-15?msgid=65047780#65047780

Lou have you taken a drink today? Well there you go, ODAAT. You are sober today and that's what matters.

My first AA meeting was followed by 4 beer and three quarters of a bottle of Whiskey - but that was one day (a whole lot of one days ago) this is a new day, just stay away from the first drink today and you'll be fine.

Manly hugs being sent your way - and don't forget 1 day out of 92 is t going to ruin all the health benefits you got before.

What happened....well this originally started as a 100 day challenge and the 100 days was up on 23rd and we are going out to a drinks party and I think the whole pressure of will I or won't I drink just got to me as the days were getting closer. I almost wanted to test the water as I was worried about feeling crap on Christmas Eve if I did drink. Plus there is just so much on telly at the moment and everyone around me kept saying about me having a drink at the end of the 100 days etc. I am annoyed but also really chuffed with how far I got this time and I have confirmed that it really isn't worth it as have written the whole day off today feeling crap😰

I have noticed this is a pattern though....if I say I am having a dry month I give up at 23 days...and I gave up 8 days early on this challenge - I wonder why that is?

that must be annoying for you BUT....also really really well done on the 90 plus days!! That is an acheivement in itself and needs celebrating, imho 90 plus days is fantastic.

What's your thoughts next? Is it poss to recommence after the Christmas period?

Not my thoughts are to keep going. I much prefer life Dry and don't think I am going to be able to moderate - the taste for it just came right back .

I am looking at this as a learning curve and just a small bump in the road of my journey. I never thought it was going to be an easy journey....

How are you doing today?

Lou - I would think about some sort of supported abstinence - more so than just on here. The way the taste cane back so quick would indicate that you really missed it, which might be part of the reason that you go back on when you reach close to a goal. I know I bang on about it, but ODAaT is the only thing that works for me.

Words of encouragement needed. Champagne is flowing and I feel bloody boring with my elderflower and tonic.

throughtheviolets - it is really hard this time of year, I feel your pain but it is really not worth it. Do you want to lose the whole of tomorrow to a hangover which is what I have done and I am really cross about it.

One other thing, my husband and I have just been looking in the mirror at our faces and you can see the alcohol on our faces from just one night...we are both slightly puffy and don't look anywhere near as good as we did yesterday. It is a poison

Be the fresh faced, clear headed one tomorrow - you really won't regret it!

Oooh tonight is tough. Just don't lift that first drink. Do anything else but that. You will regret it.

lou I am fine today. Getting over myself and my disappointment.

Lou sorry you fell off the wagon yesterday...I did too ! 125 days and then 2 small glasses of red at home. No more, not too much and I did stop. Not drunk or hungover. Bit annoyed today but not overly. We had some bad family news and I really wanted a glass. Not to make me feel better, I don't even know why really. I now intend to stay dry until January and will see how I go after that.

Patchwork sorry to hear you had bad news :( hope everything is okay?

not sorry just read your post again - sorry you had disappointing news too! Hope you are okay?

Lou I wish, wish, wish I had posted to you yesterday!!!! Because I was going to say, why don't you decide it's not a 100 day challenge after all and that you've chosen to just be a non drinker/tee total/permanently AF????

Anyway, I didn't as I got distracted and I'm sorry.
I just picked up on the fact that as your "end of challenge" was approaching, you seemed to be possibly brooding a bit.

I remember when you started posting earlier this year, you have been AF for a very long time all told. Don't count the blips, they're just not worth it. In fact, they are just Wine Witch propaganda
Forgive yourself right now

Why don't you start listening to AJ Noooooow and maybe think about just deciding to quit for good?
Because it seems that you might be driven by what you tell yourself the end date "may" be .... If that makes sense??

Likeahurricane you are right I was brooding, had started thinking about "the end" of the challenge a lot and I think that's why I sabotaged it.....

Like a lot of people I find saying it's Forever is difficult but I think that's more to appease other people than myself - I know a lot of drinkers in fact everyone I socialize with is a drinker so they all constantly ask when I am going to be drinking again and having the end date of after 100 days was easier.

Just going to say I don't fancy it at the moment and I do have this other medical thing that means I could really do with not drinking for another 7 months,should I need and excuse I can use that.

Thanks for your thoughts :)

Home, sober...exhausted but sober. And so proud of myself.

Thanks lou for the encouraging post. It really helped!

Well done Violets - That's brilliant! It is tough this time of year, but you got through last night.

Lou - sounds like you have lots to think about - but nothing can take those 90 odd days of being AF away from you and the improvements to your health.

I got my 1month chip last night - celebrated with a huge lamb shish kebab. I hadnt worked out it was 1 month - I was so busy adding each day on that somehow I got to 31- numpty!

Thank you knackered it was tough but feel bloody brilliant for it this morning. My first Christmas hurdle cleared.

I got asked if I was pregnant twice and 'ill' another time

Well done on your 31 days too. Four weeks for me today.

Lou you don't need to appease other people. It's your life. I know that is so easy to say but it's true.
Step back and detach for a minute from what your friends/social group are saying to you and look at it in the cold light of day. Why is it so important to them? Could it be because they wish they didn't drink as much? So basically it's nothing to do with you, but in fact all about them?
Why do they care so much? It's a bit weird really, when you think about it. We all have to contend with this, but isn't it actually a bit freakin weird????

For everybody here, the fact that we drank way too much or were even addicted to/dependent on drink was/is only ever a part of us.

A very important, destructive part but still, only a part.

Every single one of us posting here at any time during the last 12 months are so much more than that.

So here's a bit of me that has nothing to do with the fact that I used to drink to excess and that I'm now a non drinker. None of this is in any way extra ordinary. It's just life.

I'm a nana, a mum, I love people, I love my friends and I'm a fucking brilliant friend , a retired police officer, I run half marathons, I'm really good at helping other people to run half marathons, I love my road bike, I cycle a lot, I meditate every day, I'm learning to practice Reiki, I love reading. I love walking, I love Jillian Micheals fitness Dvd's, I like spending time with DH ..... (With no clothes on )
Music makes me happy. I love belly laughing.
Sunshine makes me happy. I love a full moon..
I'm compassionate, empathetic, I love delicious food, I love cooking, baking, planning holidays.
I get my hair highlighted. I like it long.
I love posh cycling gear.
I love buying my kids gorgeous Christmas/birthday presents
Sometimes, I'm filled to the brim with joy.
Sometimes, I feel shit and some members of my family are a total complete pain in the arse

There's so much more than this to me, I could go on all day

I was all of those things (and more) when I drank in a problematic manner. I'm not saying any of it's new. What I'm saying is that I'm still all of that (and more)
I just don't drink now.

I'll put money on it that you are just the same. The list will be different but still ....you are so much more than drink.

Drink is not the definition of you, of any of us and neither is the fact that you don't.

Oh, yes and I don't get the anxiety terrors anymore. That crushing, panic attack type, black feeling .....

Through well done. Here's to a lovely, clear headed day where you can do what you like

Knackered that's a great milestone ... love a Shish kebab, great way to celebrate!!

Ok, I'm the total cliche. Surprise, surprise moderation does not work for me.

Slowly it has been creeping up. Yes I'm leaving it with three days in between, usually more and probably only drinking twice a week but I need to knock this on the head before I end up where I started. Last night I managed to polish off two bottles of prosecco, this morning had a whooper of a panic attack.

So many mornings the last month I have woken up to that familiar anxiety and thought of 'that's it, I need to stop' then given enough time I forget about it and push the fuck it button again. I know in my head I was considering a dry January but I think it needs to end here.

I'm surrounded by heavy binge drinkers and I hold my own up to that standard which isn't good. Last week I was at a Christmas party (sober as I had a skinfull a couple of days previous) and a friend was telling me as she sunk into her second bottle of wine, she'd had two bottles the night before. In my mind I'm using that as justification to drink similar, think I'm not as bad as that, ignoring the fact I've been there before and this is where it's leading.

I've been on and off this thread since the first one, I have a mner from it on my facebook and she is celebrating over three years sober. It hit home that I was kind of jealous of that fact. I think she's done amazing and should be so proud of herself but I wish I'd had the strength to carry it through myself.

Anyway, apologies for the waffle, it's distracting me from getting anxious again Here we go again, day one.

Tattoos you've read my mind and posted what I was thinking. I too am an old timer from this thread. I slipped back into having a couple but nowhere near as bad as I was but it's a slope nonetheless.
I went out yesterday for dinner with six friends. Only three of us drank. Everyone had a great time so why did I drink? I'm now hungover and ready to start again on my dry journey.
App has been reset. Day 1.

Sorry to hear you are similar Hadron although I feel a little pleased I have a day one buddy Shall we keep each other going? At least we are recognising the behaviours for what they are before we slip fully back to old habits. Small mercies.

I have no idea why I feel wrong-footed by my inability to moderate. Every time. Some nights I do only have a couple and leave it at that and I use it as excuse that I can do it, ignoring the nights that I most definitely don't. I feel fantastic when I'm sober. I look better, sleep better, my mood is better, anxiety all but disappears and my bank balance gets much healthier looking too. Yet sooner or later that voice appears that I'm missing out and just one won't hurt, I've changed? Makes absolutely no sense. Bloody addictive substances.

Tattoos, Hadron and anyone else
If its any help I ever so nearly did drink a couple of days ago, for no obvious reason, and everyone on here helped me through it.
And we can help you through it as well :)
Yesterday was probably the very worst ever day of my adult life.
I dealt with it, it was awful, I never want to have to do that again and I got to bed at midnight (to lie awake for 4 more hours due to the adrenaline :( )
And I realized I had not even thought of a drink to blot it all out. Or at all.
Day 90 today (this time around)
Day 365 (minus the 8 individual days I have had a drink or two in the last year)
Either way, I am celebrating ( if a bit muted after the horrors of yesterday)
Here's to an AF life. Alcohol is really not for me.
KOKO sober warriors xxx