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Original poster

So ashamed of myself

128 replies

Theblamegame · 19/09/2016 21:08

Name changed for this.

So I was dating a guy for around 6 months when we decided to call it a day. Nothing bad but we just didn't see it going anywhere.

We always had good chemistry and sex. So even though we broke it off we slept together a few times since.

I've been feeling in the mood so made contact and we exchanged a few dirty messages and hinted at meeting up. So I sent him a couple of nude selfies (have done this lots before, I know no face etc) and a suggestive message. This was on Friday and he hasn't replied. I followed up with another message yesterday evening and still no response!

I am feeling so embarrassed and ashamed at myself as he must think I am crazy. I feel like I've thrown myself at him.

How do I stop these feelings? I am so low this evening and can't stop thinking about what he must think about me.

OP posts:
TheGhostOfTroubledJoe · 28/09/2016 21:33

Christ PurpleTango What a load of misogynistic bollocks.

Cathaka15 · 28/09/2016 21:34

Purple. Why would you post that ? Op clearly has said she doesn't mind about the pictures and that's not her issue. Good on your son on his views. But if he would share pictures of women he has been sent in confidence then he' really has no respect for women at all.

Mrstumbletap · 28/09/2016 21:39

The OP has repeatedly said its not sending the pics that is her issue, she is body confident, she didn't include her face, she has no mutual friends with the guy. Unclench!!

This isn't a debate whether you agree with sending naked pics, this is about him ignoring her after her messaging him, and she feels like she has thrown herself at him, and felt a bit low.

OP, have you heard from him since your first post?

PurpleTango · 28/09/2016 21:40

"Purple. Why would you post that ? Op clearly has said she doesn't mind about the pictures and that's not her issue. Good on your son on his views. But if he would share pictures of women he has been sent in confidence then he' really has no respect for women at all"

Does it come a huge surprise to you that most young men would share explicit pics of women they hardly know with their mates? Or are you really that naïve??

Original poster
Theblamegame · 28/09/2016 21:40

Hi Purple.

You (and your son) will probably be very relieved to know that the pictures weren't of my 'nether regions'. I don't really see the appeal of that either.

They were mainly topless/partially clothed pics showing off my actual body. But it is a interesting to know that despite your DS having no respect for women that send these pictures, he is also happy to share them among his friends... That seems like almost contributing to the issue if you ask me?

OP posts:
Original poster
Theblamegame · 28/09/2016 21:43

Also Purple I feel like you are missing a bit of a point... He isn't a guy that I barely know. He's someone that has seen me naked on numerous occasions and has spent 6 months exclusively dating.

Quite frankly if he shows them to his friends I don't particularly care, as it's not like I'm going to bump into them. I would never even know.

OP posts:
Vvlgari · 28/09/2016 21:43

Purple I imagine most women on here hope they have brought their sons up with a better attitude towards women, and basically not to be cunts.

WaitrosePigeon · 28/09/2016 21:48

Your son sounds like a hideous human Purple. I'm embarrassed for you.

I think blocking his number is the best thing OP Brew

AnyFucker · 28/09/2016 21:49

Purple, the existence of males like your son is exactly why I would never share naked pics of myself or condone my daughters doing it

But your fucked up sanctimony is nauseating, along with the woman hating cuntishness of your darling boy

I would be ashamed if my son grew up with those attitudes

Celticlassie · 28/09/2016 21:51

Purple Your son is a disgusting misogynist and anyone who would look at /share naked pictures that were NOT sent explicitly to them, is verging on a sex offender imo. You really should be ashamed of yourself that you've brought your son up with attitudes like that.

Original poster
Theblamegame · 28/09/2016 21:59

Oh and update on the original dilemma.

I bumped into said ex today in the supermarket! We caught up then he complained he hadn't heard from me for a while. When I mentioned the pics he had no recollection; we scrolled through his phone and it turns out he had been abroad then changed phones and they didn't even come through.

But guess what Purple - I sent one of them again and he thoroughly enjoyed it WinkSmile

I suppose in the eyes of your DS that makes me a 'common slut' now?

OP posts:
MUjunkie · 28/09/2016 22:01

Grin hahahahaha!

AnyFucker · 28/09/2016 22:05

He's not been blanking you after all then ?

Original poster
Theblamegame · 28/09/2016 22:07

Doesn't sound like it, I may see him next week (or may just move on, not sure if he has been worth the hassle)!!

OP posts:
confusionoftheillusion · 28/09/2016 22:35

And you're proud of your sons for being like that purple..... WTAF??!!

WanderingTrolley1 · 29/09/2016 02:08

spent 6 months exclusively dating

I very much doubt that.

ohdearme1958 · 29/09/2016 03:18

Purple I don't live in a society where people have the freedom to live the way people do in the west so my experiences in life are a bit limited when it comes to certain things BUT despite that I can still recognize your sons as a pair of complete and utter arseholes . They are not nice young men and I'd be ashamed of them if they were mine.

I'd also be ashamed of myself for being all puffed up about their responses the way you are.

But I guess they did learn from you because how else would all 3 if you be so in tune with your thoughts.

limbocentral · 29/09/2016 04:58

Purple I really hope my daughter never meets anyone like your son! He sounds hideous.

LouisvilleLlama · 29/09/2016 05:17

Lol Purple I'm 24 (ok very nearly 25 so I may be talking as an elderly person here) but your son sounds like an absolute twat ( the polite version :-)) it doesn't surprise me that some absolute wank badgers (again the polite version) share photos for I have been shown some by others, but that isn't the girls/ womans fault. Just because someone sends a picture to somebody doesn't mean that I expect it to be shared, like you wouldn't expect people to randomly share a photo of a young baby.

Also because somebody sends a photo to one person it doesn't mean they send it to everybody( that should be obvious), and it's people like your son showing and sharing the photos of women that make them eventually end up on the internet so what your absolute douche baggery cunt fuck of a son ( the polite version again - you get it!) doesn't understand is by his logic he could get a girlfriend who, by his smugness it seems absolutely impossible but somehow she felt comfortable enough to send him some dirty pictures and he shows/ shares them with his friends and they somehow end up on the internet potentially destroying her life because she dared be promiscuous with your son and because of his own actions he would then dump her.

DadWasHere · 29/09/2016 05:22

No nudity selfies with face, ever, is what I told my daughters at age 14. The common sense of this was brought home to them a year latter when one of them got a second hand mobile phone. The phones previous owner had been a woman, who did an incomplete job of clearing out her phone and had not deleted SMS's that had failed to send.

tsonlyme · 29/09/2016 06:11

Theblamegame your update about sending the pictures again is one of the funniest things I've read in a while, it properly made me laugh 😂

I'm in the dating game too and I've been sending pictures (no face and no fanjo!) to the guy I've been seeing for the last five months. It's fun 😉

I'm really glad it looks like you've had a good result after all. Enjoy 😄

somekindofmother · 29/09/2016 07:16

Purple are you really saying you are proud of your son for sharing pics of girls with his friends?! I would be mortified if my son thought that that sort of behaviour was so ok he'd tell his mother about it!! I never got the impression the OP sent vag pics, just pics of her fab gym bod that she's proud of. your son clearly has no respect for women, I highly doubt he gets sent vag shots 'all the time' Hmm

OP - the lesson here is don't send pics to immature idiots like purples kid Wink

Original poster
Theblamegame · 29/09/2016 07:39

Purple. I have a couple of friends that sound a bit like your DSs but in female form. They claim that they get sent dick pics 'all the time' and to talk to them you would think that the pictures weren't provoked. However I've glanced at some of their conversations and most are certainly alluding to the fact that they wouldn't mind seeing some!

I don't know for sure but somehow I doubt that there are many girls out there that just send images of their 'nether regions' to guys without any provocation.

Maybe you need to wake up a bit and recognise that your DS's aren't saints.

(Also you are their Mother - are they really going to be telling you the whole truth about their naked pic habits?!)

OP posts:
TheVirginQueen · 29/09/2016 07:42

That's what I thought. Girls don't send those photos to the wholesome shy sporty guys who blush when a girl asks them if they'd like to go bowling.

Wise up. Sorry, but really, if somebody's son is regularly getting pictures sent to him then he is part of the equation. My teenage dd wouldn't do it because of fear and I hope self-esteem, but mostly FEAR.

TheVirginQueen · 29/09/2016 07:45

OP I can't believe you learnt nothing! Whether this guy got the pics or not, you know from experience that not hearing validation back from him made you feel bad. You bumped in to him, he gave you some story, may be true may be not true and you sent another one! Blimey. Did you not think after the last time, 'that didn't make me feel great about myself' so I won't do it again. Confused Live and learn. And that is from somebody who learns most lessons the hard way!