Help! Boyfriend advice!!

[chelsm93]

Ok, so I've recently started seeing someone new. We were having a chat the other night and he asked me to be honest with him about a few things from my past. I went on a girls holiday a few years ago (way before I met him) and I had sex with a few people. I was young and stupid... I recently came out of a relationship and lost my way a little bit. He caused a big argument about how many people I've slept with and about what I did on holiday. I understand it probably wasn't nice to know what I did but in my eyes the past is the past. On the night of the argument we seemed ok again and then ended up having sex. He went home and then told me he was still upset about what he found out!!! 3 days on he's STILL going on about it. I've apologised for upsetting him and explained I wouldn't even think about doing anything like that again I was young. I just don't know what else I'm meant to do!!! I've told him if he doesn't want to be with me that's fine just stop dragging it on. I've told him how I feel and that I want to be with him but I can't make him. On the same night I asked him to hold my daughter (not his baby) and he made a comment saying he's not a babysitter which upset me but I didn't say anything about it :/

[MephistoMarley]

He's a disgusting misogynist and you would be sleepwalking into an abusive relationship with this controlling arsehole if you don't end it now. You know how women who get stuck with abusive men say they wish they hadn't ignore the early warning signs? This is one.

[Cabrinha]

You do realise that he set you up with the instruction "to be honest", yes?
He wanted you to give him the stick to beat you with.

I slept with 2 people at the same time on a holiday once. It was great fun. I am not a slag. My boyfriend knows. He doesn't care.

You could have slept with 10 men a day on your holiday and:

• you would not be a slag
  
• it would not be a mistake unless YOU regretted it
  
• it would be none of his damned business
  

And that's before you add in his shitty comment about your baby and being an arse about your looks.

All this from a new boyfriend?

Be glad he's shown his true colours quickly!

I really do hope you stick to your decision to get rid of him - because it's a good one!

[Goingtobeawesome]

He's horrible. Definitely get rid.

[RubbishMantra]

Chelms93 - I used to get the whining, "why don't you make that effort for me?" With sadface thrown in for good measure, from nasty ex.

I made the effort for myself. Not that utter penis. (He really was.)

On the other end of the scale, I'd say to my late DH, "ach, I look hideous because I haven't done my hair and make-up." His response, "No, you're beautiful."

Glad to hear you're getting rid. You deserve so much more.

[Desmondo2016]

He wants something serious yet had a dig about having to hold your baby.

I agree with the consensus. Bye bye boyfriend .

[1weekdown5togo]

What a disgusting attitude he has towards your child. I wouldn't let him near your baby again.

[Crinkle77]

Massive red flag OP

[Cabrinha]

Oh FFS Princessmi12 you really don't half talk bollocks on MN!

I am reporting your post because I consider you to be making a personal attack, in calling the OP's behaviour "slutty"

I hope others on the thread will do the same.

A woman who chooses to sleep with 1, 2, 5 or 100 men is not "slutty".

So please fuck off with your disgusting woman hating shit, OK?

[User543212345]

Slutty is such a horrible word princess and there is no place for it. You may not choose to have recreational sex with randoms but that's your choice for your body. Don't judge other people for what they do with theirs.

[chelsm93]

I never said I had unsafe sex with any of the men so STDs were not possible. I made the decision to have sex with those men and I don't think my actions were slutty in comparison. I was on holiday in Zante where sex is pretty much the theme in every bar or club you went in to.

[Cabrinha]

Then say that the behaviour is risky, or best done only with good contraception.

Never ever call a woman on MN a slut, or describe her behaviour as "slutty" because she chooses to have sex.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

[Cabrinha]

chels don't bother trying to justify or even explain your behaviour to "Princess".

You've done nothing wrong.

If it helps, "Princess" thinks that it isn't classy of other people to sell things second hand.

So, you're not really explaining yourself to someone who talks much sense

[chelsm93]

Oh well princess may hate me then! I had sex for fun and my daughter is currently playing in a second hand jumperoo

[SandyY2K]

I think everyone has their individual definition of what they deem slutty and I don't think Princess has made a personal attack either.

It's just that some men have a terrible double standard where it comes to 'the number' before you met them.

I've come across men who are married with children and then find out how many their wife had and it's a big problem for them. They actually say that had they known the real number they wouldn't have married her.

Yet one woman has had over 300 men and her husband knew this and doesn't have a problem with it. She's also never cheated on anyone.

Some women deliberately say a lower number because they know the true figure would put a lot of men off. I know lots of women who do this.

Women are always held to a higher standard in this area. Just like women having affairs, people seem to find it worse than men having affairs.

[Cabrinha]

Tbf to 👑 I think she's happy to bestow used goods on others in order to build up her personal karma. It's the selling of second hand goods yourself that would lack class.
Probably a slutty thing to do, too 😂

Good on you chels for fun sex.
Fuck 👑
Fuck your arsehole boyfriend

And hallelujah for the Jumperoo, the best toy ever!

[princessmi12]

Cabrinha
Hahaha
Is MN supposed to be girl empowering thing or a platform for honest discussions ,where opinions exchanged and conclusions made out of said discussions( that help people to resolve their situations)?

[TempusEedjit]

So if the OP had slept with the same 3 people over the course of a year rather than over the course of a week she'd magically be less at risk of STDs from them? Sounds like it was as one off, not 3 a week for years.

OP run like the wind from this man, he's a bad'un.

[princessmi12]

Cabrinha
Looks like you have no class whatsoever ,the more you post the more its obvious..

[Cabrinha]

And how is your opinion in anyway helpful "Princess"?
Oh, your boyfriend called you a slag, but you know - you were a slut, so...
???

As for "girl empowerment", it's mainly women on here, though I daresay some girls look too. And I hope as a result they pick up some good information, benefit from shared experience, and realise that there are also some arsehole posts too.

[emilybrontescorset]

When someone asks a question and wants an honest answer then thst is what they get.

He is a mysoginistic.

Who needs a man like that.

None of his business anyway.

[Scarydinosaurs]

I would definitely dump him and tell him it's because you've been with sluts before, and don't want to make the same mistake again- he must be a MASSIVE slut, because look at the fuss he made about your behaviour...and he has slept with more people!

Such a dick. Nothing 'slutty' about what you did. Sex is a recreational activity. You used protection. Massive double standards- you don't want a man like this around your daughter!