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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

He ignores me

34 replies

itcuddles · 28/06/2016 13:48

Bit of background, been with my boyfriend for only a month, dating for 3 months. Both mid twenties, no kids.

In person my boyfriend is super loving, affectionate and attentive, the problem is when we're apart. He is notorious for ignoring my texts. He's never been a good texter from the start and would always take a while to respond but always eventually did. This didn't bother me as it allowed me to get on with my day without a distraction. However it's now at the point where he will just point blank ignore my messages. I breezily explained to him how it made me feel trying not to make a massive deal, and he apologised saying it wasn't his intention to make me feel like that but has since continued to do it.

I understand he doesn't like that constant back and forth messaging so I've made a conscious effort not to send pointless chat to him but it hasn't made a difference. I'm now going out of my mind wondering what's going through his Sad
Any advice on how to approach this? We're still in the early days so I don't want to come across as clingy and naggy ultimately scaring him off, but I feel like it needs to be addressed before it becomes a massive issue.

OP posts:
sadie9 · 28/06/2016 23:26

He might have dsylexia and is embarrassed about spelling mistakes in the texts, that might just be it.

HeddaGarbled · 28/06/2016 23:35

I genuinely think that this is your problem not his. Just stop texting him. 4 to 5 texts a day to someone who isn't replying is bordering on harassment.

He likes speaking to people on the phone and actual meet ups more than texts. He's like a really real proper real person diamond of a boyfriend. Don't drive him away with your incontinent inane texting.

Kiwiinkits · 28/06/2016 23:50

What Hedda said.

DonnaMurray1 · 29/06/2016 04:59

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sonjadog · 29/06/2016 08:37

I think you need to forget about what you "should" be doing at this stage of your relationship, and just focus on what is actually there. See this as a period of getting to know him and let things progress at their own pace. 4/5 messages a day sound a lot to me, but to others that is normal. Maybe you are starting to discover an incompatibility or maybe you just need to adjust to each other? Time will tell.

AnecdotalEvidence · 29/06/2016 10:44

He is rude. Just don't text him anymore and ghost him.
Unless you're an adult who wants a grown up relationship.
That's not a solution for anything.

footballcrazy11 · 29/06/2016 11:24

I think you just have to accept it is his way and look forward to the times you are with him because otherwise it will spoil what you have

LesisMiserable · 29/06/2016 17:30

When you text him 4/5 times a day what are you texting about? You're an adult. Texting shouldn't mean f* all in the context of an adult relationship. Unless you want to kill it before it even gets going of course.

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