DH has gone missing

[HeadWrecked26]

Name changed for this as I don't want this attached to my usual name.

Long story short DH (and his friend) has gone missing and I have no idea what to do!

He went out to friends on Sunday evening around 6. He called at 9ish said he was staying out but would be home approx 10am Monday morning.
All fine as he didn't have work etc etc.
I had a message from his friend st around 2pm Monday saying that DHs phone has died and that DH is really sorry he is late but he'll be home by tea time.
Since then no one has seen or heard from DH or his friend.
I've checked the police custody suite, hospitals, as many friends that I can think of and been round to friends house but obviously no one was there.
I'm worried sick, I can't sleep, can't eat and my anxiety is only letting me think the worst has happened.

I know this is about ranty, sorry for that! I just needed to talk about how scared I am. Can anyone think of a logical explanation to where they could have got to? I need abit of hope that he's okay!

Sending you strength for today Head what a twat he's been

You are doing amazingly. It's a quick rip of a plaster and you've already proven over the past week that (even with the potential of even worse things having happened) that YOU CAN COPE WITHOUT HIM.
xxx

Your doing the right thing for you and your little boy.
Big hugs chocolate and wine too xx

What an absolute week from hell for you.
I've been following this but I was not expecting that outcome.
I'm so so sorry you are going through this.
Get your friends and family to support you.
Eat and drink when you can.
Take care of yourself.
for you!!!!

Sorry to hear this OP, what an absolute bloody idiot he is. He must be so embarrassed about his behaviour. Get some legal advice as soon as you can and take good care of yourself with shed loads of chocolate.

HeadWrecked I feel so fucking angry for you. That is such a despicable and cowardly thing to do. How can someone disappear to get their end away knowing that his wife may be worrying he is dead?
What an utter utter cunting bastard. Is he still in hospital? Maybe a few of us could visit him and bring him some grapes? (Rotten ones crawling with maggots, obviously). And throw them at him.

You poor woman.
Sending you love and strength

Again, HeadWrecked, I'm really sorry to hear how things panned out.
I do second the getting checked over in case of any STIs, which is a horrible thing to have to do.
I have come to know someone who has been in a similar situation and at the time, they made the decision as you have, to rid their lives of their parasitic no-good 'partner'. Life is much better for them now, despite the dark hours that crop up now and then.

Legal advice should likely be next on the agenda, but make sure you allow time to deal with the shock and that you get a support network in place.

What an asshole best of luck to though

It's completely understandable how you're feeling right now. I just wanted to say that a man that is capable of doing this to you and your son is not a man worthy of your love or being your husband.
I hope the pain goes soon and you and your son can be happy and look forward to all the adventures ahead of you

Keep going headwrecked

You are right - don't think about it. He's filled your headspace for days, so you need a rest. Pack his stuff up so you can't see it and block his number on your phone so you don't check it to find out if he has tried to phone / not bothered.

Give yourself a treat and just take a couple of days off from this. It will give you a chance to develop the strength to deal with whatever comes next.

My heart goes out to you, what a cunt he is, and what an awful situation to find yourself in.
Get him out, wrap yourself up in your little boy and start again as you must, the two of you.
younate stronger than you think, don't let him do this to your little family

So sorry you've been through this OP, what a horrible nasty experience. IMO you are doing the right thing with clearing out his stuff right away, allow no room for lies, excuses etc - no one deserves what he has put you through and anyone who can do that, especially when you have a child to consider, is scum in my opinion. Those sleepless nights and stress would no doubt have been picked up on by your child.

Was he hoping that one trip to a&e would stop you questioning where the fuck he's been for the past few days?

What an absolute prick. I am FUMING for you. To cheat is to be scum. But to go missing, and all the worry that entails just so that you can cheat? That's lower than I ever imagined a person could be.

I hate him for you.

What an absolute wank puffin. OP as others have already said you can clearly look after yourself and your LO and you do not deserve to be treated the way you have been. I'm so sorry it's ended this way. I'm fuming on your behalf. I personally hope his dick turns blue and falls off.

You're doing the right thing by getting rid. You deserve so much better than that poor excuse of a man.

Never doubt that you're doing the right thing. He's done too much, hurt you too badly, let you down, cheated, lied, make you worry yourself sick, been a coward, used other people to cover his tracks, and much much more.
You will be stronger for this. It must hurt awfully at the moment, but you can now plan your own future, be in control of your life and know that you have faced the worst and come out the other side.

Oh what a total utter bastard. Stay strong

Wow. This is shocking OP. Not the same at all because we weren't married/didn't have kids/didn't even properly live together but I had a boyfriend when I was 21 who just did a bunk one day. Stopped answering the phone, fled to his mothers up north. He had been cheating and knew it was all about to hit the fan and was a massive fucking coward. I've never forgiven him for the week he put me through where I was worrying myself stupid he was dead. That was worse than cheating to be honest. It's been ten years and I still loathe that cowardly arsehole for not even having the courage to tell me what he had done.

Stay strong OP. You'll get through this.

He doesn't deserve you

This is the most pathetic thing I've ever written but I can't cope with this, I thought i could but fucking can't.

No no no you are so far from pathetic.

How do you think you should be feeing right now? This is day one. Be realistic. Cry, drink, eat junk, find some friends to prop you up.

Op I've been following your thread and I wanted to say that you are doing amazingly well, I admire your strength during this horrible time. You will get through this, you will have wobbles but I bet you'll surprise yourself. It is your husband who is weak not you. I'm routing for you