DH has gone missing

[HeadWrecked26]

Name changed for this as I don't want this attached to my usual name.

Long story short DH (and his friend) has gone missing and I have no idea what to do!

He went out to friends on Sunday evening around 6. He called at 9ish said he was staying out but would be home approx 10am Monday morning.
All fine as he didn't have work etc etc.
I had a message from his friend st around 2pm Monday saying that DHs phone has died and that DH is really sorry he is late but he'll be home by tea time.
Since then no one has seen or heard from DH or his friend.
I've checked the police custody suite, hospitals, as many friends that I can think of and been round to friends house but obviously no one was there.
I'm worried sick, I can't sleep, can't eat and my anxiety is only letting me think the worst has happened.

I know this is about ranty, sorry for that! I just needed to talk about how scared I am. Can anyone think of a logical explanation to where they could have got to? I need abit of hope that he's okay!

If he was seen yesterday, why isn't he at work today? What will the implications be for him of not turning up at work? Could he lose his job?

Apparently they were
Walking through a town about an hour away. Didn't seem distressed or anything but as I said I don't know this person personally and with a baby I can't just go trawling through a town an hour away that they were supposedly in yesterday so I've left it to the police to follow it up for me which they've assured me they are doing.

You must be out of your mind with worry. If he was seen yesterday, why not get in touch to let you know he's OK....he must know you'll be frantic. What a selfish thing to do.

I do hope he's OK but I fail to see how there can be any happy ending to this story, I personally would struggle to forgive someone who had behaved so selfishly & disrespectfully.

[flowers} for you OP

Oops

The information from the friend of your dh's friend doesn't seem to make any further sense of all this. This must be so difficult for you, I hope things work out ok.

Have you tried his phone again? Is it still off?

Why would he show such little consideration for you or your child?

I'm so confused by this all. How can he not be worried about you - or even worried about you worrying about him? None of it makes sense.

I hope you get some proper answers soon.

Wow, so the best lead you've got is that he's still hanging out with his pal?

Oh, dear, Head :(

It's obviously a relief if it means he isn't lying injured in a ditch somewhere. And also suggests he's chosen to be missing with no regard for you.

It must be so hard to keep it together with so much uncertainty & anxiety. Please remember to eat & drink! I hope you have kind friends & family around you now.

Is there a possibility of drugs being involved?

Hope he turns up soon OP

Well, if he's alive and apparently just strolling happily through some town an hour away that would be it for me.

I'd be engaging solicitors and finding out about divorce at this point.

This doesn't make much sense now! Did the friend contact you to say they'd seen him?

He doesn't have his wallet, or (so his mate claims) his phone, he hasn't bothered going to work but he's strolling around a local town like he's on a day trip?

Why is his phone still not charged? What is he doing for money? Why is he not giving a fuck about his 18 month old and his wife?
Have my first LTB.

glad he's been seen OP

so he's given up everything to be with this man.

OP I was up at dawn and saw your first posting and have been following all day. In fact I have just registered on MN for the first time just so I could post you my support and love.

Thank goodness he has been seen alive and well. Does he gamble perhaps? Maybe he has made a loss and couldn't face telling you. Or could he be suffering from depression and have hidden it from you so as not to make you worry? Depression sometimes does not make us act normally.

I know neither circumstance would excuse the lack of contact from him or at least from his friend just to let you know he is alive. Have a big hug from me and make sure you are looking after yourself please.

So odd. Slightly reassuring but so strange.

I said up thread that they were probably on a jolly.

It's reassuring for you to have a potential sighting of him but if it turns out that he's just upped and left without so much of a word to you then I'd kill him!

The observation I find chilling because it just doesn't make sense. Would the friend's friend lie and if so why, I wonder.

OP have you tried calling his mobile from a different phone or hiding your number in case he's blocked you?

Could you email him or message him on FB etc just in case he logs on?

Been calling his phone every hour or so for days now. Still turned off.
The information about them being seen wasn't told to me directly. There are a few of mine and DHs friends also asking around and speaking to people, the info was passed to one of them and was then passed to me. (Hope that makes it more clear where the info has come from)
I'm relieved that the information we have is pointing towards him being okay but just so frustrated he hasn't found the brain cell required to get a message to me telling me he's fine. Even with a dead phone it isn't difficult to get in touch with someone if you wanted to.
This is all pointing towards him being a selfish prick which in a way is a relief as it means that he's okay! Fingers crossed now that this will be resolved sooner rather than later and I'll be able to know what the fucks going on. I'll base my relationships future on what happens when he's found. If it's selfishness I cannot move forward from this but right now all I care about is him being safe and well. I'll cross those other bridges when I come to them.

Thank you to all of you for your continued support

If the sighting is genuine and really them, I reckon they went far out from your town Sunday night and didn't want to tell you.

They then ran out of money/had money stolen, phones have died and they have no way of getting home/contacting you.

It is nothing remotely like a jolly to have no phone contact with your DW for 4/5 days having just 'popped out' with a friend. .. And also not show up at work and literally vanish of the face of the earth.

It is unforgivable. I'm so sorry OP

Does he have a car?

Sorry also to add no drugs/gambling/MH issues that I'm aware of but honestly it may well be to do with one of those, I just don't know anymore.

I suppose using my theory, you'd still think he'd get to a police station to phone you? Does he know your number by memory?