We're Stayin' Alive, it's DATING THREAD 105

[tanyadm]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Evening all!!

Dick pics - NO!

I ended up going on a last minute date tonight from OK Cupid. He is younger than me by 5 years, I can tell but he is mature. He told me he doesn't believe in chivalry as women have demanded to be feminists ... Major red flag as I am a fan of the traditional vibe. He was oddly chivalrous though. Should I see him again if he asks ????

Right so got a match on tinder all the usual stuff how are you what do you do and then so do you live on your own? I thought it was odd is it? Or did I just over think it?

Sorry meant to say hi to everyone first!

Well I've learnt something new about policemen tonight! I had no idea!!

Also like that it seems to be a resounding answer to no dick pics. Is it just me or are those things ugly? 😂😂

Ooh witches that's good about your date! You should be privileged if he's not been on a date... He must be fussy 😉 and yeah I'm definitely not ending things until I know what it is! In a weird way it's taken a lot of the dating pressure off... Don't feel like I need to worry he's only after one thing!

What, don't feel bad. Sometimes a nice bit of attention and speaking to someone whose not involved is what you need at a time like that. Hope you're holding up ok.

Burger sounds like an odd thing to say but he obviously likes being chivalrous! Maybe that's why he has such views on it haha... If you like him go for it!

Getting there - was it in context?? Sounds a bit to odd to blurt out.

I have told Mr Tall that for date 6 I would take him out and pay... He has paid for EVERYTHING so far (despite my offering) and I feel guilty... I keep asking him for ideas but he's also planned every date cause I'm so indecisive sooooo I'm feeling maybe I should try and plan something... Any ideas? Do you think it would be weird if I maybe looked at getting us a hotel even though he's said we can't 'dtd'? We've both said it would be nice to end a date together and not both going out separate ways but I'm not sure whether I might make him feel awkward.. Help I'm crap at planning!!

Carrot - I think hotel is nice even tho no Dtd. You could plan in a city away and mooch around the sights in the daytime.

Getting there - I often blurt random questions like that out on tinder so I don't think it's too strange

Someone on tinder has messaged me 6 times with no reply from me, I replied about 4 days ago but got bored. He said he wants to take me out at the weekend and can I let him know as he needs to plan. Said he will bring me a present - desperate/ avoid ???

How very forward burger - you haven't replied and he's asking you to let him know?? Did you ever agree to these plans? If not then I'd expect him to assume I wasn't unless I did!! Goodness..

Hmm that would be nice. Only thing is i think we are talking Friday night and my dd doesn't get picked up til about half 6 and he works all day so we would barely really get any use out of it!

burger, I'd tell him, that you're a feminist and you're chivalrous. You'll hold the door open for somebody walking behind you, you'll help somebody who appears to be struggling with their load, you'll stand up and give your seat to somebody who needs it more. I'm feminist and I'm chivalrous and I expect a man to be chivalrous too. It's a concept an intelligent man can grasp I hope!

Ahem ! Just posting to say me and Audi driver did the deed last night. . I dont know what happened to the padlock on my knickers but I think it fell off when his shirt did. It was ok but he was really nervous and hesitant for some readon after being really rampant last week. Finally managed to get the sails up but i dont know if it was just me but there didnt seem to be any passion to it and it was over quite quickly.

Afterwards he was really keen to talk, again about his horrible boss and his problems with his ex. Maybe he was worried.

Still, he sent me a lovely text when he got home and it has ended my three years plus celibacy.

...skids onto thread in manner of Patsy from Ab Fab with bottle of bubbly in hand and hair askew...

Hallo darlings! Well after very long dry period I did indeed shave the legs for FrenchChef (and boy was he worth it!) Haven't seen him since Fri eve/Sat morn but lots of texts since Mon (I had a big wobble on Sat as he went a bit quiet but a couple of girlfriends talked me down, plus some very good messaging action from another iron kept me from getting too invested in FC. Other iron is currently at Glastonbury but sounds like a potential date for next week)

I have to say/type this "out loud" here (because if I don't, I'll blurt it out in a manager's meeting in work and end up in with HR for inappropriate sharing) - I thought I'd never have amazing sex again. Mid 40s, size 18, celibate (hello singleandfabulous ) for nearly 10 yrs (not really by choice but through lack of confidence) - well it's all a lie that you have to be skinny, young, tanned, toned - I'm quite gobsmacked!

I'm sure there are going to be many wobbles along the way but I am going to enjoy the ride

Wow single and littlewoolly. My first anniversary is probably coming up in the next month or so and I thought that was hard work! I commend you two

Carrot well get some action in asap before your first anniversary comes up

Yay! singleandfabulous I have had a similar longer drought so I'm chuffed for you.

Maybe it would have been over even sooner if he had been passionate iyswim? Personally I would give benefit of doubt on first time dtd if nerves come into play. So long as everything else is all good.

I have a date!

Omg I am so nervous. This will be the first online date that I have actually had. I think I am usually over cautious so I am biting the bullet and I'm going to meet this one.
He is very hot. But to be fair I'm so bloody horny my standards may have slipped
We are planning a picnic in the park but what do you wear for a date like that? Forecast is sunny. I'm usually a skinny jeans and t shirt type. Maybe a maxi skirt would be a little more feminine but not too much? I'm overthinking this. The most important thing is not to forget my chastity belt

Ooh good news woolly I'm chuffed for you too!

This thread is currently giving me a lot of hope.

Ooh rose a date!! How exciting! I would go with something that looks like you've made an effort but isn't over dressy. I'd say a maxi skirt would be perfect if the weather is nice

I can't keep up with this thread! Love it!

Just thought I'd update on my my second date with Mr keen. It was fucking amazing. The food, the cocktails, the secret speakeasy bar, the walking in the thunderstorm and getting soaked. I am unbelievably randy for thus dude. Oh my.

Glad it went well spotty!!

Forgive me for being thick - what's a speakeasy bar?

Wow....what was in the water last night?
Spotty, Single,Woolly & Rose so chuffed for you all!!
Carrot - sounds like things are going fantastically - could you get twin beds? so no pressure and if you want to push them together you can?
Getting there - I think that's ok, some 'separated' people still live with their exes so I think its a valid question.
Thanks Witches I did block him this morning, when he demanded to know why I was on the site again last night and was I looking for someone else? WTAF?? I've not met this guy?! Why do I seem to be attracting the crazies?
Burger thats weird to say he'll bring you a present? Isn't it?
What how are things, can't believe Planeman! After your wonderful date and everything, why does this happen, its never, ever just easy. So infuriating. Any luck with more irons. Hope things with your mum are ok?

Can I get a poll? after last week I've shut down all my profiles, apart from one, OKCupid....but I'm attracting complete knobheads! What site is everyone else using?

Thank you all for applauding my shag! God it was nice just to have a hot naked man on top of me Yes, Id imagine he was nervous. I shouldve allowed time for him to warm up in fairness but it was. naught to sixty in about 5 minutes!

Hi littlewooly Its nice to know youre still desirable isnt it. Ive been on a mission this spring exercising and dieting like a loon eith a view to getting laid.

carrot celibacy's never bothered me up until this month as i hadnt met anyone I'd fancied.

Rose how exciting! long dress sounds great. good luck (report back).

Ha ha spotty that sounds brilliant - like a romantic film.

this speakeasy bar is like a secret place - it's a prohibition themed bar where you have to give a password to get in. This one was in a cafe - you have to walk through a fridge door - and it opens up to a secret bar, its a lot of fun. Wicked cocktails!!

I'm still a bit drunk at work hehehe

I thought I'd never have amazing sex again. Mid 40s, size 18, celibate (hello singleandfabulous ) for nearly 10 yrs (not really by choice but through lack of confidence) - well it's all a lie that you have to be skinny, young, tanned, toned - I'm quite gobsmacked!

Wow, yay go woolly!! I just loved reading that today, I'm 48, same size as you and whilst i'm pretty content I do get collywobbles about my size/belly/bits I don't like before the first meeting. So well done you, and thanks for giving me a confidence boost for my date with Quirky tomorrow.Glad to see your confidence did not hold you back and it worked out great :-)

prizey I agree with the others, don't feel guilty messaging people, there is no harm in it, and you cannot be totally focussed on your mum 24/7, you need a bit of pleasant distraction as a break, it will help balance your mind and emotions a bit and what's good for you, will help you support your mum better. Such a shame about Planeman, after that great date. Very hurtful.

spotty, Mr Keen sounds great, what a fab date... I'm watching developments with interest!

Carrot I agree, hotel somewhere nice with a mooch around could be just the thing for the two of you, just to spend time together. keep it low key and no pressure for DTD ...maybe that will help convince him you like him for who he is and not whether he can or can't 'perform'...do you think that's why he says he can't have a relationship with you?...because he thinks you won't want him if there's no PIV action?

Witches think the message to me was meant for What

I just asked for a poll of what sites everyone is using

Prizey I usually get the crazies too. Once when I was on match.com i had a chap 'demanding' that I meet him in town wearing a short skirt, stockings and heels for goodness sake. when I refused and said I did not want to meet him full stop, he started throwing horrible insults at me, saying I looked like a man in drag, I had saggy boobs (how would he even know what they are like etc. I reported and blocked.