Good morning Hush - how are you today?
Ahhh, so you are somewhere between me and madamehooch ... interesting! Trying to work out where that could be. In the meantime, you might be between us, but there's no sitting on the fence allowed. You will have to declare - red or blue. To madame - PUP!!! 
I read what you said about contact (or lack of) from his side of the family. I've had the same experience. We weren't particularly close and, in fact, hardly ever saw them due to distance and ill health. STBXH would go up on his own to visit his mum - not enough room for all of us to stay. I did all the cards, presents, flowers, new baby gifts, wedding presents etc - like most women I guess. It was my birthday a few weeks after he left and, for the first time in 26 years, there was no card from any of his family. I knew that he must have told them, but just didn't know what and, like you, didn't know if they hadn't sent anything because they were awkward or angry or what. Just cards, but I was so, so incredibly hurt. Just chopped out of the family after all that time.
We'd never been particularly close and didn't really get on that well - STBXH told me once that his family didn't like me - but it still hurts. I decided to work on the basis that his elderly mum felt awkward rather than angry, so when it was her birthday I got the DCs to sign a "Granny" birthday card and I put a little note inside to say that she was welcome to call the kids on the home phone when she wanted to speak to them and, if she felt that was a bit difficult, then I listed their mobile numbers. She did call not long afterwards and I answered the phone. We had a brief, perfectly civil if somewhat stilted, conversation and then I put the kids on. There has been nothing since, but the kids have phoned a few times to keep in touch and I will keep up the Christmas/birthday card and present from them. I feel that I've done my bit and, after all, none of this is her doing. She's just an elderly lady and I thought about how I would have felt if it had been my mum. Still hurts though 
Anyway, enough misery for today! I must say, your cake making skills sound really impressive. You ought to post some photos. Do you do it as a hobby? I know of a couple of people who started out making cakes for friends and then expanded over the years into full-on business. There seems to be a big market for theme cakes. DD1 will be 21 later this year and three weeks later DD2 and DS1 will turn 18. I have been thinking in terms of a small family tea with a special cake for them all. Not hinting, by the way! They will not want to hang around for long - clubland will beckon 
Keep going Hush. That's all we can do. Have you managed to move on any further with house sale, solicitors etc? It's a horrible, horrible thing to have to do, isn't it? I'm hating every minute of it. It's being forced into taking action and making decisions, all the while he sits there deliberating over what he is prepared to "let" me have. He sent a mealy-mouthed message to say that he wanted me to be financially secure in the future and that it was his intention to be "fair and supportive" to me "and our children". Oh well, that's OK then! Ooops, Tartan's slip is showing
Waves to everybody else on the thread. Hope you're all doing OK?