DRY 13

[lilybetsy]

This is the thread for all those who are living, or committed to living, life free from alcohol.

I will quote a sober poster "I'm fitter, slimmer, richer, happier & healthier"

Go sober warriors !

Fucking hell Lucy (scuse the French) that sounds horrific. I can't begin to imagine how painful that must be to be around.

Matron - the wafer thing ham thing made me laugh. (It also reminds me a bit of my dad struggling to accept, and getting a bit arsey, that I had allotted myself an allowance of two small half glasses of different wine on Christmas day, and would not "taste" the third - when I was pregnant.) Did you explain it? Are they getting it?

Hi Finnish
hi efc

Hi everyone!

I hope you've all enjoyed a Monday of getting shit done without fuzzy head and jitters.

P / ex P / stb ex P / and I spoke tonight. It was short, calm, to the point and pretty pleasant. I think we can actually make a decent plan to split that will not be too hard on the dcs. I am weirdly relieved and I also feel free to be simply sad too. There are bits of this that won't be easy. But I feel free to admit to myself how dysfunctional much of the relationship was, how that can't have been good for the dcs, and it seems clear looking back how misguided my dogged stubborn determination has been at times.

While in the adrenalin space, not a thought of booze has crossed my mind. It's the tough / boredom / what next / this is hard / no one loves me space ahead I'll have to watch out for.

Sober warriors.... I'm afraid you'll be seeing a lot of me.

howbad look forward to seeing lots of you and being there to march on with. I wondered if you had spoken yet

lucy I need to do more explaining face to face. I'm preoccupied with work this week but will find a quiet moment. I feel worried about making people sad for me/themselves.

What I witnessed Friday I had seen before but the effects of the physical dependency and the big open gateway that alcohol gave the green light to go through had some shocking activity on the other side.

Howbad I won't be repeating the experience anytime soon that's for sure!
Glad to hear you are reaching good places with your XDP re the way forward
Matron if this week-end has taught me anything it is don't worry about other people worry only about you. How others feel is down to them not down to us :)

I am already worried about ex-P and drink as my overactive imagination spirals into crazy overdrive. There is no point in imagining that my staying with him would stop him drinking - 11 years of experience shows that isn't the case. But ... I'm worried about how he might be alone.
On the other hand - maybe he'll not be driven to drink once I'm not there!

Evening everyone!

Lucy your weekend doesn't sound fun I hope the chocolate is soothing things abit.

Been in work till late so day 3 gone well. Planning to speak to my sister she's very work stressed and normally we'd have a heavy night out to relax- which ends in the exact opposite- stressful work talk followed by anxious hangovers and even more worn out come Monday. I'm going to organise some proper relaxing weekend activities with her- walking, spa even looked into meditation retreat.

Morning everyone. Happy Sober Days to you all.

Lucy your weekend sounds pretty awful. Hope you are feeling better now.

HowBad you are brave and strong.

I've been very low the past few days, but am thinking positive today. Might try the lemon and ginger cordial with fizzy water... it sounds good!

slim sorry to read that you are down. Can you fit in some exercise today? And how about an Epsom bath? (repetitive suggestions sorry). You are a very caring soul can someone care for you and get you back up again. Xx

Thanks Matron. Bath sounds like a good idea!

DH is great. He said to 'leave everything' to him today and I just get on with whatever I need to do. Apparently I need to be reading MN. :)

I have depression and have been on citaloprom which my GP has recently weaned me off.Not sure if it is that, or if I am just having a moment.

Thanks.

slim lovely DH only here could we be suggesting a bath at 9.15am?! Definitely take a walk if you can.

It turns out the okey cokey is not what it's all about after all. It's baths and star jumps! That's what it's all about

Morning all

slim sorry to hear you are feeling down. Don't forget you are in that period when your body is withdrawing from alcohol, so you will be feeling down due to that anyway. You know what to do - be kind to yourself, get some nice food in, baths, early bed.

Nice to hear so many of you are enjoying yoga camp! I am working my way through it on day 17 or thereabouts right now. I don't seem to be sticking to it as well as the 30 days of yoga I did first... A mix of the average session being that bit longer, and having been away so much lately and losing track. I do love Adriene tho

Am away at a funeral this week with my big drinking, wine-loving family. They seem to have gotten used to the idea of me cradling a soft drink finally, which is nice!

Take care all, I hope you are enjoying some sunshine wherever you are.

Hi slim - sorry you are down. Do take sometime for yourself and be gentle with you. The first couple of weeks are very hard emotionally and physically - hope you feel better soon

vxa where are you ? Please come back 🌼

lucy I can imagine that weekend was bloody hard. it must be difficult seeing friends so close up - hope your self care has restored some equilibrium.

matron how are you doing ? Have you told DH and DM that you don't believe moderation will really cut it ?

Welcome efc Good for you making the decision not to drink - and 👍⭐️🌟 For the first three days

Hi to everyone else I haven't name checked .. I'm plodding on - day 74 - looking forward to day 100 ! Have also planned and booked a rather expensive sober treat for me in a couple of weeks ... ,

Lily 🌷

That's day 4 of Yoga camp done - glad you love Adrienne too fuzzy - is it wrong to wish you luck for a funeral? Anyway - hope it goes as well as a funeral can...

Sorry to hear that you're feeling down slim

lol at the 9:15 bath matron

You still there mary?

efc - your relaxing weekends sound brilliant! I'll go if your sister doesn't want to :)

Oooh look pop off for 5 mins and there's so much going on. to efc finnish and considers changing name to englishbiscuiteater...

Matron - really brave but sounds so positive to involve dh and dm. The ham sandwich made me giggle.

for slim, Lucy and howbad. I think the problem of seeing all the possible outcomes and getting anxious about what might happen may be related to addictive personality type. Really recognise that ... And Lucy am sorry your weekend was grim.

Had a moment over the weekend myself - but this was a positive one. Was at a big party for christening of df's little girl and not drinking was such a non issue. Most people had a glass of fizz, maybe a wine or beer but a lot of people stuck to soft drinks too - and they'd made a lovely mocktail. Its very good to have that kind of reality check that socialising does NOT necessarily involve alcohol - and had a great time :)

Sorry haven't commented on everyone's posts but here are to all the sober warriors.

Hi everyone, thanks all. A bath is scheduled for tonight after DS goes to bed. I am looking forward to it. I have a magazine I love also waiting for me. :)

Hope everyone is fine and the day is lovely where you all are.

Afternoon all :)
Don't know if any of you have read Gabor Mate's book In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts. It's superb! If not here's a link to an interview done a few years ago with Tommy Rosen during his inaugural Recovery 2.0 conference
vimeo.com/165933800 Not sure how long he's leaving the link live so get it while you can (it's just under an hour long and he is well worth the listen)

Hi everyone

Slim enjoy your bath and mag!

I love trashy new, closer etc to read in the bath.

Fuzzy hope the funeral goes as well as can be expected.

Sybil glad you enjoyed your party drink free.

I part own a business- today we had to send an employee home after a complaint from a client. This lady was drunk she has been drinking while in work, nobody knew it was a problem. What a wake up call about how evil alcohol can be.

Anyway day 4 here and massive decaf tea being drunk.

Hi Everyone 💁 I'm really sorry about this I've hit rock bottom these last couple of days and even though I don't want a drink I just want to cry all the time xxx I am already on ADs and have been since the age of 29 (now 44) so quitting the alcohol has already improved my moods but then I've hit a slump 😞

I'm still reading Allen Carr I have days when I can take on the world and am strong and calm the other side is paranoid constant crying and wishing I could use something to numb the pain xx

Please tell me it gets easier I thought I was doing so well but don't feel proud or happy 😥

So sorry to hear you are feeling so bad rose. I don't have any words of wisdom but for you. Feeling low and fuzzy headed myself, can't think clearly at all, like I am hungover but am not. Am sure someone will be along with something more sensible to say in a minute! Perhaps this is the release of lots of pent up feelings and eventually you will feel lighter and better. You are doing so well though so you should feel proud!

Rose it may well be PAWS. Lots of self-care and self-compassion needed If it doesn't improve within a week I would head to your GP and discuss it with them lovely :)

Rose sorry to hear you are having a tough time. It really will pass and things will get easier. In the first couple of weeks I went from highs to lows faster than a Big Dipper. Someone here mentioned that your brain has to get used to your new alcohol-free status and your moods can be quite erratic whilst it finds a new equilibrium. So lots of self care, sleep and try to eat well. Maybe a trip to the GP if you aren't feeling better in a day or two? They may want to tweak your ADs now you aren't drinking.

Hugs and

X post with Lucy!

rose it will pass. The troughs are brutal to take. All that raw emotion. Give over to the crying and let it out, nothing wrong with a sob.

True to type I am out of sorts but have engineered an argument with DM and DH (non alcohol related). I now feel dreadful. And so I should. My anger is fierce.

It's because I have stupidly put myself back to square 1 by drinking on Friday. I've got to start all over again and work through a load of shit emotions.

fuzzy thinking of your need to attend a funeral. Take care xx

Cooee great minds :)
Matron be kind to yourself too