Brave Babes Battle Bus is Racing Along.....

[venusandmars]

Our lovely mouseface usually starts these threads but I've just noticed that the previous one is almost full, so I'm facing technology and get the next one set up.

Anyone, absolutely anyone, who feels they have a problem with drink is welcome here. Whether you're trying to stop, or cut down a little, whether you've been sober for years, or even if you're too scared even to contemplate what is happening. If you think it will help you to post, or lurk, then please do.

There's often a lot of nonsense and banter, but lots of good sound advice.

And there is always lots of support and care and no judgement.

This is the link to the previous thread, if you want to read what's been going on so far The Previous Thread

And this is the link to JesusWhatNext 's original thread started 6 years ago The Original Thread

Im in bed. Not drunk at all just feelin sorry for myself . I could have easily went those few houts with a juice but I didn't know what to say and felt trapped in a sense. But im not drinking now and I never drank enough to make me "drunk" thanks god xxxx

ma!!!!! ma!!!! How did ye get on the day quine? Were they lovely to you, my thistle-heided pal? Did it sound promising? Wis thinking of you when I was painting, but had mucky hands so couldn't come in to wish you luck without clarting everything in Forest Brown. xx

joey I had good butteries yesterday. Well fired, crispy, greasy discs of Aitkensy goodness. Nay. Greatness!!. The bag wis wringing with grease by the time I got home. I ran the gauntlet of hungry digger drivers and emerged victorious! The world is as it should be...I am making my way through another Stuart MacBride at the minute, perfect bedtime reading! xx

Glad you made it to work okay Lala, you okay? xx

halle tis but a teeny blip, m'dear, you haven't gone back the way, you're having a wee piaffe to yourself. You can go forward from there, you just need to kick yourself on a bit, and we all know you can do it, xx

muddle a wee slip up here too, how are you tonight? xx

hope you are like a big comforting hug, I see your name and I just go aaah. How are you my friend? How's life going? Have you managed to sit in the sunshine? If I could shine a sunbeam on you all day every day I would. I have had another day in the garden, it looks pretty ruddy good despite being secure. I got caught in a thunderplump yesterday, just after we'd painted the last section of fence, I could have roared, but it survived. (Thank you Mrs Cuprinol). Washing all out today, blowing in the sunny breeze, just away to iron it, where's Columbo when I need him...

Dreading work tomorrow, I can front it out, but I've had such a nice few days off. No sooner did I relax it's time to go back. Little notebook will be at hand to pencil in anything. The stress of it all has given me a lovely eye twitch, so will be winking at everyone tomorrow as well. I am having the last half of my elderflower cider tonight, after my ironing.

claret I am gutted, no time for a puzzle today, sheesh, it's addictive once you start! Next door's hairdresser assured her that Scotland will get a summer this year so I do plan to relax in a beautifully manicured garden when it arrives.

But...I will need green tinted sunglasses to view the grass. She has burnt it to buggery with her hydrochloric pee. Next door offered their all singing and dancing scarifier but I think it's past help. She's already eaten the flowers off the strawberry plants, which is a shame as she's partial to a strawberry. I would buy spiky shrubs but that won't stop her.

P.S Lala your pup will be fine me dear, don't worry. She is probably just as happy as you are that man flew the coop last night. They are incredibly resilient wee things, they just need love, food, water, playtime and toileting and you give her that in great big dollops, xx

Unless you ever have a lab. Then it's food, love, food, water, food, playtime, food and toileting with a side of food.

halle you've absolutely not failed, those af days are still under your belt - no one can take that away from you. You managed to drink responsibly then stop. The holy grail right?? Bag that up and continue on. Well done you.

wry addictive is an understatement - I can get totally lost in a puzzle or two! I bet your garden looks absolutely fantastic, isn't it a lovely time of year when everything starts to bud. Our (small) but pretty garden is such a nice place to be these days.

elba your post sounded full of promise, I think it's fantastic that you are feeling able to speak in rl to someone honestly and frankly and completely. That takes some doing. Well done! I'm so pleased you feel this bus has helped you. Sometimes I think back to before I was on here and it was a much darker time.

faire what a great analogy!! My spin on it would be its like a spot that needs squeezing, you look forward to it all day...then when you pop it, is actually a huge anticlimax and just leaves you feeling a little disappointed

wry she is a Shih tzu. Just had to make other arrangements for her when I am having to go away with stupid work. I haven't had dinner yet because I have been doing a bit of self pity.

Cba ironing. Done my uniforms and pyjamas, that's enough for now

Lala if anybody is entitled to a bit of self pity I reckon it's you, that must have given you quite a fear last night. But..you have organised puppy care, you made it through a tough day at work and you have made it home. Please have something to eat, even if it's a wee bit of cheese on toast washed down with a mug of tea. You will feel better, xx

claret spring is so wonderful, so fresh, so full of vibrant colours and new beginnings. I lay under next door's cherry tree today just looking up at the blossom. Incredibly pretty, incredibly peaceful. I am so going to get a cherry tree once she's stopped doing her black beaver impression.

I have my eye on a steamer chair next. I would dearly love a hammock but would need to reinforce the rowans a bit. They would morph into hysterically weeping willows almost instantly.

faire love the boil analogy too! Just googled to find a pretty picture, eek!

wry I love you and your musings. I am stuffing my face with spring rolls. I feel so sad for my puppy, I am leaving her with total strangers when I go away... Having a few glasses of wine to get over yesterday and also face tomorrow. If I say anything more it will out me, but again, tomorrow is a bit deal... As in career depends on it.
Love to all the babes that Re doing really well. I am a failure and crap. Hey ho

Now you see, you can't go wrong with a spring roll petal. Your pup will be fine, and she will give you the full on hairy ambush when you get back. That will make you feel like the superstar you are.

Good luck for tomorrow, make this glass your last for tonight and brush your teeth so if your are tempted for another sip it will taste vile. Somebody a long, long time ago told me about the brushing teeth trick, and it really works. Night night chicken, sweet dreams xx

Wry a hammock? In Scotland?!

Have you actually lost your mind?

Morning all

You guys make me laugh. I love this place lol. So maybe im breaking the rules but so what - it was a tiny slip and I wasn't drunk so im on day 8 sober! Not AF, but definitly sober as I was not drunk last night. So im
Gonna sit on 1 day AF and day 8 sober. Thank fod
For
This place. I thought about it a lot while I was sitting drinking and I really think U all helped me to take my time and think about what I was doing. I feel so grateful for that and it's for that reason I never over done it and im not the tiniest bit hungover and I still feel fresh. Thankyou guys. And just for the record ... I had a better time the other day with a cup of tea watching the film "sisters"
Than what I did sitting out having a drink and chatting. It really wasn't all that fun AT ALL. Infact it was pretty boring and I found my mind wondering a lot (hope they didn't notice) but I was thinking about the mountain of washing and dishes I was wanting to tackle
Before they turned up and school stuff I had to iron. I actually felt like an "adult" lol x instead of like a stood child who drinks and find that's more important than anything xxx

halle alcohol is always a disappointment ALWAYS. My fondest memories are my sober ones. i can just see you completely smashing this - your desire to stop jumps out the page, you're doing fantastically.

lala hope it goes ok at work today, you've got a lot on your plate by the sounds of it. Hope you're ok

Happy hump day babes.

Can I join?
I don't want stop drinking I just want to cut down. I generally do 2 days per week AF but on the other 5 I often (not always) end up drinking equivalent to a bottle of wine.

We have a very social life and I have a stressful job. We are also part of a club that makes drinking too easy.

Yesterday was AF and today should be too however the DC have a sports club and I know DH will suggest calling for a drink. Tomorrow I have family round to celebrate, Friday we are out with friends, Saturday we are going for dinner but I am driving so that will only be an issue when we get back! Sunday we are at a party all afternoon/evening with friends and then Monday we are going out for dinner again as its BH.

Every week I say I will do Monday-Thursday AF but it doesn't end up working like that. If I am at home I can quite easily not have anything.

I have a quieter week next week so tempted to wait until then.

Lala - glad you're safe.

Elba - long term therapy is a brilliant thing to do for yourself. I had quite a lot once and it really helped.

Wasn't taking offence at the twice a year comment, I know what you meant. It is just that prompts a huge period of shame and guilt in me. I basically think that dh and I can be moderate on our own but not in company. Which I don't really understand. I've said next time we are drinking in company I will drive as that has worked before in that I'll rein him in.

Anyway three days AF here and no desire for a drink at all. Still feel too shitty. Did an online shop for the holiday and ordered a bit of wine and beer but would never get lashed with the people there. They offer a cup of tea after two glasses and I go along with that as I don't want to shame myself!

Cauliflower, welcome to the bus! You'll find a whole range of drinkers/non-drinkers here. I am much like you...it's only a handful of times a year (and usually with a certain group of people) that I simply cannot control myself and end up doing something awful or putting myself in terrible danger: other times, yes I drink too much, but can moderate with apparent ease. What I have noticed though is that my 'moderating' is increasing in volume and frequency so I want to get a hold on that.

My only advice is that there'll always be an excuse to drink, ALWAYS, so putting it off is fruitless. You have to make your decision and then comit to it becoming reality. If your goal is to cut down, you might benefit from a drinking app (I use the dry January one) or marking af days on a calendar? It's helped me as i can see patterns (what days I usually drink etc) and tots up my numbers of days af per month. It's very motivating! I like to try and beat my previous months af days.

Hi all, hope everyone's ok.

halle and claret I totally agree that drinking is generally a disappointment, I'm actually finding that I don't like the taste much at the moment. It's more of a compulsion I think.

cauliflower glad to hear therapy helped you. Now I've finally decided on it I'm actually quite excited, in a weird way!

hello welcome to the bus!

wry hope work is ok, or at least not too horrible. Just make sure you take note of everything, in case you need (or want) to escalate and above all remember that although it's horrible and stressful you are the better person in all this

lala hope everything's going well at work for you too!

Managed an AF day yesterday so haven't had anything since Monday morning after work, and that's 6 days this month. It's probably the longest AF period I've done (54 hours and counting), just trying to fight the urge to binge tonight as a 'reward'.

Congrats elba you should be proud of yourself. The work thing went surprisingly well today, but I now have the sorest throat in the world, literally feels like it has been sandpapered. Colleagues are all in the pub celebrating, I have pleaded illness so have come home.

Puppy had an hours walk this morning, but either dog walker forgot to shut her in the kitchen, or she somehow managed to work her way out. Just been clearing up the carnage, including an entire shredded toilet roll all over the house. Abusive messages from the now ex. All a bit emotional right now after the last two days. I am having a quiet glass of wine (I know I know), and metaphorically rocking back and forth and shaking my fist at the sky with a 'why me?' sort of theme. Was going to go back and join people at the pub, but think it's best I finish this glass and go out for a dog walk, then a bath, or the way I am feeling, the fall out just won't be worth it if I am let loose although I know I'll probably have a another few glasses when I get back from the walk feeling pretty wretched right now.

How are you all doing? Sorry for being such a melodramatic drama queen these last few days

Go elba that's fantastic!

lala you've not been melodramatic at all - by the sounds of it you've dealt with everything with dignity and respect. Take care of yourself, perhaps get yourself something to eat? Hope you feel better soon

Thank you claret. Feeling just tired of it all right now! another drama queen statement had a lovely dog walk, which is one good thing.

Now I need to try and find the poo that the puppy has inevitably done somewhere in the house. Three floors! Wish me luck!

Aw lala I want to hug u right now. You sound really stressed so it's no wonder your drinking. I messed up to last night (Ragin at myself all day tbh) but im AF again today and im
Hoping to keep trying to get as many days in a row as I can and hopefully each time I fall off it will be after longer than a week and it will get less and less until im just not drinking anymore cause I simply don't like it and that's it! Which honestly lala, last night was shit. My night was crap. My mate came round the other day and we had cups of tea and watched the film "sisters" and we laughed so much it was the best fun I've had in ages. And there was absolutely no drink involved. I found last night quite dull and boring and I was honestly finding each mouthful of drink yuckier and harder to drink each and every time. I can honestly say the smell and taste just was not nice last night and I really wanted them
To go so I could make a cuppa and have some chocolate and get some
Ironing done lol (what a saddo) but seriously I wish Id just told them
To fuck off. I gained nothing but a few
Empty calories last night and it sounds to me like that's all
Your gaining from drinking now! It's just not fun anymore isn't it not?? I genuinely didn't have a good night and I swear a few months back that would have been my ideal night. Wine and girl
Chat! Not now though and I think ur getting there but the stress of everything else is holding you back xx love and hugs xxx

I am drinking wine but only having 2 max! If I only have that it's ok. Next week WILL be a good week!

Hi one sorry I wrote a paragraph to you earlier but forgot to put your name in front of it! (Paragraph started with 'my only advice'...)

Hope you have a nice evening and good that you've got a limit set.

I'm just watching BGT before I get an early night. Hope everyone is ok.

B claret
that is how I am. It's like pathetic peer group pressure but everyone else involved seems unconcerned. I am clear now that I can't EVER drink in groups that aren't my immediate family.

B Elba
Be prepared to cry a lot and feel exhausted afterwards but it's definitely worth it. I had CBT too for anxiety, wish I could bloody well apply it to booze.

Gah - formatting fail!

Completely agree cauliflower - what is it with that! I sometimes think of particular people who mostly have seen me at my worst and wonder why they still bother talking to me. It's utterly horrible. We have a saying here on the bus 'one day at a time' and no wiser words have ever been spoken...take it a day at a time and approach those tricky social occasions with care and with a plan!