Ah now, inde is talking horse. That I can relate to. Evening my dear, xx
ma what a handsome wee soul the General is, and so settled already! He knows he's on a good wicket! How are you this rainy evening? xx
I have de-fluffed absolutely everything that can be de-fluffed. I've given myself a manicure and pedicure and at this precise moment in time I am the wearer of a honey, banana and oatmeal facemask. So why oh why did I pick up a mini bottle of wine from M&S?
And apparently I am the proud owner of The Scrooge Hound Of Spring. Not enough that she demolished some decorated boiled eggs in the park the other week, obviously laid out for an Easter egg hunt, now we are debudding daffodils with gay abandon. I can see the headline in the local paper now - daffodil vandal ruins local flower display....
Worse still, I am the puffy, blustery bugger who rages when I see adults pick a bunch to take home. 
I did an extra shift this weekend to stop a potential binge. That makes me sad.
sarahlou come here for a bosie m'dear. I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better. Would your partner understand do you think? I am scared this will hang over you, and potentially make your alcohol intake worse. Would the truth be easier on you, and him? If not, vent away on here, and know you are among friends.
Just before Christmas, we had our work night out. Needless to say I binged, I didn't make a huge fool of myself on the night itself but then I phoned exWB for a lift. I don't know why I did, I guess I felt lonely after being out with everyone else in couples. I'll not lie, I was collapsing drunk. I woke up/came to with him having sex with me. I can't remember everything sadly, but I remember him arranging me, quietly and gently, which in hindsight was very creepy, and whispering how beautiful I was in my ear. He never did that before, so that was strange.There are bits so hazy, he insisted I came on to him, but you know? I don't think I did. He knew fine what he'd done, I'm sure of it, but I had no definitive proof.
That also contributed to me having a major meltdown, I felt so worthless and stupid. Would I have phoned sober? No. I won't be able to phone again, as his number is well and truly deleted now.
What I'm trying to say sarah, in my rather roundabout and useless way, is that we can't change what has happened in the past. What we must do is be kind to ourselves after something like this. We are our own harshest critics. I don't deny an arse kick or two doesn't go amiss if well timed and well meant, but no-one will beat us up harder than we do ourselves. Finding a way to move on is the only way forward.
So cuddle up on the back seat with me and special, help yourself to a hot chocolate and a duvet and settle down.
Hello there bloody, ah, you're here on the bus now, that's the main thing, oodles of support and advice on here, you'll be grand. xx
Will I hope you continued to have a good night, and that your money pot is a little bit richer. Writing this has kept me away from the teeny bottle of wine. Small tatties, I know, but I did it.
Off to warm some milk for some hot chocolate. Catch you all in a bit.