What would you put in DATING THREAD 101....

[tanyadm]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP.

He's obviously thinking of you though! It's not as if you're a booty call and he's got a list of possible women. Is he a bit chaotic and just goes through life with things happening to him rather than him planning?

Forgetting my manners, good luck Foxtrot

He's uber-creative, Foxtrot - possibly to the point of fecking utter annoyance. Is just is Not That Into Me. You guys know about as much as me.

This would be date 7 and we already got naked.

So we sent a couple of messages each other mine was the last one but not going to get all up tight if he doesnt respond. Will have another look on the app and see if anyone else catches my eye. Had a few messages mostly "hello" and one from someone who wrote "i know this will sound cheesey" and signed off with xxxxx.
None of those really make me want to message back.

Good luck fox

handy do what feels right. I would personally go and talk to him. It is entirely possible that he messaged you to let you know he was free on he hope that you would say 'let's see one another'. Hence the p.s message as a more obvious 'nudge'.
He could be utterly bewildered if you explain how you feel. You hardly know each other. Messaging is the devils work. Talk to him.

Plus. Every single one of us have found ourselves free when a work commitment has fallen through.
Listen to your gut handy overall. If you feel he is a good honest person who doesn't play games, follow that instinct and be open with him.

If on the other hand, you feel he is a player. Or the communication levels aren't working for you, call him on it. But given how much you like him, give him a chance.

handy excellent advice there by sassy exactly that

handy from what you've said on here twix sounds like one of the good ones. If I was you I'd say what you were thinking all this "does it look like I like him too much" doesn't work for me I can't and won't play that game. if he likes you you saying how you feel won't scare him off and you'll feel better.

Thanks everyone I'm here but he's sent me a text to say he's held up and will be a little late. I'm just wondering if I should be brushing up on my MH style flirting techniques in the bar!

Handy it's good advice to speak to him. Is he flirtatious in real life? I know you said he wasn't particularly in his texts. Everybody is different and his love language is not the same as yours from what you've said.

muddling it's good just to get used to chatting to people when you start OLD and it helps you develop that skin.

Actually I'm going to use this time to develop my other irons.

Tinder isn't working on 4G and I don't want to swipe left on pics I can't see in case Stuart the welder is really hot

This thread is galloping along, I can't keep up!

Waving that's so lovely of MTG. I so want you to go to Spain, but I can understand why it might not be a goer am totally over-invested in someone else's love life

Handy oh what is fecking wrong with these men?!! I would find some irons, after a little breathing space. It might be that Twix is thinking it's all good, and there you are, angsting (totally a word) and he's got no bloody idea. If you can bear it, a little diversionary iron might help.

Dr Foxtrot yes go on the date. I am going to do this from now on, I think. Give people a chance. It could all go a bit tits up, but at least I'm trying!

Off to catch up on the rest ....

Thanks guys. I just cut the crap and sent him a very honest text calling him on the lukewarm text, asking him to let me know what he wants and telling him that sometimes texts are shit and phonecalls sre better.

10secs later he called and said he realised his text was a bit under enthusiastic and that it's not that he doesn't want to see me but we both have busy weeks.

He was quite reassuring and lovely am leaving in in a bit to go up there! Except that I've been so glued to my phone I have now lost the dog!!!

Hello folks, may I join? I'm a MN regular but have NC. I've been lurking for a few threads!

Put up an OLD profile on one free site a couple of weeks ago, also joined a paid one this weekend.

Have two irons currently:
Mr Yoof from paid site, he works with youth offenders and sounds lovely so far, but have only exchanged a few messages on site. I'm hoping to entice him out for a drinks date later this week.
Mr Sunglasses from free site, who frankly seems far too busy to be on a dating site. offered me a date on Saturday night, meeting at 10.30pm. Erm, no. Obvious booty call attempt, especially since he said "let's meet at a pub near you". I then suggested a lunch date this week and he said "It's a really busy time for my business at the moment being tax year end..." Well why send messages on a dating site, then, you cock?

I've been reading Matthew Hussey, and I've read WMLB. Don't really have any problems on that side since I know damn well I'm bloody amazing

Hello Doofus! Agreed Sunglasses sounds like a cock, I'd forget engaging with him now unless he does a complete u turn. Yoof sounds encouraging! Which sites are you using?

My advice is: never ever ever ever ever get smitten like this. It's awful!!!

I found the dog...

Handy that sounds better, with a bit of coaxing you can show him how you like communication to be. If it becomes too much like hard work then at least you tried. I still think he's a good one. We all want Twix to turn out good.

314 god, that would dampen anyone's ardour!! Can you get a chain to put on the front door?

DeeDee it's hard to be rejected, I know. That's why it's always a good idea to have a few irons on the go - I didn't do that, and it backfired, so I'm going to try and do that now.

last blimey, you had a lucky escape from that twat! I would have been furious, too.

muddling I've only been OLD since the beginning of February, and it's much easier now to message and chat with people, it's just practice.

ocelot

Oh handy that sounds much better

I forgot to report on my date this morning. It went on for 4 hours, as we were chatting away. And he's been texting me since he got home. Was keen for a second date tomorrow (!) but I've said I can't make it (which is true as I have things to do that I should have done today, on my day off, but didn't because I was on this date!), and said we should try a different day, left the ball in his court.

I have another date on Thursday with N, who is also now texting. We haven't finalised details, so I'm not counting my chickens with that one.

Thanks DrFox, I'm using Times Encounters I'm a lefty though Tried GSM but very few men in my area (Brighton! lol)

Can I ask what everyone's experience of Tinder is? My experience was that is was mainly focussed on hookups, but that was a few years ago and things maybe have changed?

I am staying away from OKC as I keep getting matched with my sister We're both bi, but nothing like the Lannisters

Batshit- 4 hours is an impressive date!

Handy- well done for calling him out on the lukewarm text- enjoy your time tonight!

Foxtrot- I hope the date is going wel...

LOO UPDATE - he's lovely much better than I was expecting but not sure I fancy him...

Batshit that sounds great!

Doofus I love tinder, very quick and simple and I found the standard of men much better than OkCupid.

314 good to hear that your weekend with bear was fun, but oh my god at your mum letting herself in (although a brilliant comedy sketch .

Anna can I just say that I love the pugwash name- can you say why? (Or have I missed that bit?)

Jolly = bacon and that is all..

Foxtrot have a great date!! Lol at your updates for developing other irons whilst waiting- go you!

Handy good result with telling Twix what you thought and subsequent phone all from him- enjoy your night, oh and congrats on finding the dog- lol.

Waving what can I say that others haven't I am soooo loving the MTG updates! Laughed out loud at the ship stalking app ( note to self- need to find a sailor).

Onwards and upwards to all you other lovely ladies.

Handy I share your pain

MrBeard is consistent w