The ignoring....gaaaa

[jellybean2000]

That is all.
Yes, I'm divorcing him.
He will continue to stoop to whatever method he can to control, upset and anger me.
Delay, delay, delay.

I've been here for a while but NC a while ago.

Of course he can't stop me in theory but he can make my life (more) hell.

Apparently that's ok though. I just have to suck it up as I'm not in danger.

Grrr......
I can't imagine how frustrating this is for you.
What advice have Womens Aid offered?

Everyone told me to get a non mol.

I was thinking of you today.

That's really shit but at least he knows nothing about it.

I think he needs mental health help, what sort of come back is that? What an idiot. Perhaps he would like you not to work and he can then get a proper job and support everyone! It's your bloody job that's kept him very comfortable all this time. What does he think is actually going to happen, that he could use your car forever?

Sorry I'm rambling. I'm just sorry is all, sigh, dust yourself off and carry on getting that mortgage through.

Oh that's just shit. Sorry FV45.

So sorry that didn't go the way you deserve.

Actually the law might state that what he's doing to me is bad enough (along with 2 police reports eh...) but the judge said I was not in immediate danger so couldn't do it ex parte.

There is a condition that allows them to grant an injunction ex parte if not having it thus would prevent the applicant applying and that's what I was going for, but still not enough.

She regarded me saying that I would withdraw the application as blackmail.

Who regarded it that way, the judge?

She didn't say as much but it was inferred....a sort of "don't try and pull that stunt on me" attitude.

I just cried through the whole thing.

I feel EA has been completely minimised.

Sounds awful!

Some people just don't have a clue what it's like to live with, clearly she is one of them. Probably just thinks you can ignore it.

It's one thing if the law states that these orders can only be granted ex parte if you were in physical danger but it's another to belittle you like that. Not necessary.

That is just shit, FV. I'm so sorry it happened like that and the judge doesn't sound like they spoke to you terribly professionally.

I know it's probably not really the time for problem solving, but if he's being an ass about your garden office, is there any chance you could do a short term rental of desk/office space in one of those start-up incubator type places?

At least he can't take your car now ...

How are you today? Hope nothing has escalated since he is off the insurance.

Give yourself a few days breather and then reconsider?

Perhaps with this new added threat going through the non-mol even with notice be the best move. He is clearly just going to escalate the abuse more and more

Set up your office in the lounge?

FV, are you ok? I hope the weekend was peaceful for you following your traumatic week.

You are inspirational. Keep fighting x

Delurking to say thinking of you FV45, so sorry your husband is bullying you in this way and trying to take away your work space. I hope you're ok.

Been thinking about you. I hope you're ok?

I'm also wondering how you are.
Sending positives vibes your way.

Take care

Take him off the insurance IMMEDIATELY

Thank you for your support.

I have had a very difficult week.

Feeling very low and trapped.

Losing more weight. Injured foot so can't run and it was that which was really helping me look after myself. Not sleeping well at all.

Run out of money to pay solicitor, mortgage guy on holiday ( found out via mutual friend, he didn't tell me). He hasn't signed financial agreement.

Meanwhile the abuse continues. Control, threats, using DS2 as pawn.

I closed the joint bank account. Now I need to find a way to separate food so he doesn't eat what I'm buying for me and the boys.

I took myself off for 3 days last week. No phone, no internet, just slept, read and walked. I can't think about it now as I just want to be there, in solitude away from this life.

I have been so worried by your lack of posts.

Do you now have the both car keys? You could keep some food in the car boot if you do.

It is all a mess, as he is being so abusive perhaps you do have nothing to lose by going to court for the order

I think you need to tell your DS2 just the facts that his father will be moving out once the finances and legalities are sorted. He needs to be aware that there is a reason why that man is being so odd in his behaviour.

FV hang in there, you are seriously tough and you can do this.

Thanks. Having a low day today.

Feel out of sorts, restless and uncertain. Waiting for mortgage approval, STBX to sign financial agreement and will then still be weeks.

Daily control and verbal abuse. I jump when I hear him come back.

When I stand up to him he gets verbally aggressive and/or finds a new way to be abusive.

Guess I'm too much of a burden. People have moved on to other threads.

Hiding this thread now. It's served its purpose. Thank you for the support, it has been very helpful. X

I'm sorry FV, I didn't see your last post. You're not a burden - I've been wondering how you're travelling and waiting for you to post again. I wish I knew some way to help.

I'm still here if you need to vent/chat/moan