Step right up, it's dating thread 97

[MyGastIsFlabbered]

We don't half get through these at speed!

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now)

Ooh interesting re the 4 components. Is that from a male standpoint? Am asking because 'perceived challenge' sounds like an attribute of male attraction? I wouldn't see anyone who wasn't showing interest as a 'challenge' but I do think blokes do. Cufflinks is a perfect example. I do have mentionitis about him. I need to get a grip. Or shag him and discover he is terrible in bed. One of the two...

My decree Nisi will be read in court in a few weeks. I opened the letter from the solicitor and felt: nothing.

Home alone tonight. And have had the offer of a coffee from. 51yo off OKC but we have exchanged only bland messages so am not saying yes cos there's nothing to get excited about IYSWIM.

Bummer about Theatre, Jolly. 'Not ready to meet anybody' 'meh' and 'double meh' you were messaging for a fair while, do I recall that right Jolly? Perhaps that was a sign....

What is it with all these men not wanting an relationship? yet they are happy to date the same woman for months at a time.

I am half expecting Mr Short to turn around and say he is not ready for an relationship. Its sad when you get to that point where your expecting a man to disappear on you but so many men do it. I had it happen twice and it sucks so I have sympathy with you ladies.

waving fwiw I do think you are doing marvellously re Soho. It is to be commended and I salute you! (still nothing from him nor do I expect to hear from him unless he starts running low on irons by which time you'll be like 'soho who?'.

I am rubbish at "perceived challenge" I offer no challenge at all if I like someone! Actually, that's not true, I am too keen on messaging and then I think I come across as a bit cold on dates as I get shy and insecure. Need to work on that...

And I do find a bit of challenge attractive. Isn't Cufflinks a bit of a challenge to you Handy, in that he's unavailable?

Waving, you are doing so well! It will get better and making a clean break now will make it easier in the long run.

I just counted and I have 8 dating apps on my phone! 8! 3 are inactive though and match is only active for 2 days as I got a special offer. And I just disabled Happn as there was nothing Happning...

folk I feel better about my 8 apps now! Although Match and Zoosk and Happn are due to go off in the next few weeks. So then I'll have a more respectable number. Sort of.

cufflinks isn't a challenge in my mind. Because if I clicked my fingers and said 'let's go out on a date and see where it leads....' He would be round here within 30mins. I guarantee it. So he's not a challenge to me. He is just a very enjoyable flirtation and I'm ridiculously attracted to him. I would put him more in the danger category. But for him I'm a bloody great enormous challenge. Even if it took him a year he would happy to keep pursuing, I guarantee it. His modus is to keep in touch and gradually build a 'false' emotional connection. He knows what he's doing. But it's so much fun I can't not join in. please let cockapoo with his cockapoo hair be attractive!!!!

MrCanceller wants to bring forward our date. That is quite pro-active of him. I suggested tomorrow (about an hour ago, so calm down :-p) but haven't heard back from him. He sent me a song this morning and I liked it. Normally when men send me links or clips I think, omg what nonsense/dirge/filth/propaganda/buddism for dummies.

Laughed out loud re the links/clips. Am exactly the same!!!

You like MrCaneceller - yey that's great! Hope you get the date sorted soon.

Yeah, but to follow through on that is bloody strong waving! Be kind to yourself please missus!

Scarf that internet/communication free night sounds lovely, enjoy! (if you are still reading...)

314 good news re MrCanceller and sweet about the link. I went on one date with a very right-on guy last year and he kept sending me songs. He used to work in the industry and we had very different tastes and I think he felt that he had to educate me...

Handy what I meant about Cufflinks is that he's a challenge in the sense of he's not prepared to offer you what you want. And that's part of the attraction? I do get a bit meh about an overly keen guy...which I why I just messaged MrKeen from Tinder the other night, cos I hadn't heard from him for a couple of days.

Was going to delete tinder, kind of lost faith in OLD. All the normal probably nice ones looking for a relationship I don't like/fancy and all the rats and emotionally unavailable ones I do like. Maybe this means I'm emotionally unavailable.

Messaging a pilot off tinder. Think I will knock this one on the head. I'm an air stewardess and keep my distance from pilots. He's quite fit though.

I seem to like a man who's a challenge!

Oh and waving what I said about the coming back. I usually find after about 2 months you get a "hey how's things" text/what's app.

Could be wrong of course but generally they do come back at some point. Maybe curiosity gets the better of them.

I'm feeling shitty and lonely too. All my irons have gone quiet and I've realised it's always me who initiated contact. If my latest dates actually happen fine but I'm not going to initiate anything else. My resolve will probably last about 2 minutes but we'll see.

Now that you've said it folk I realise you are totally right re Cufflinks. I know there is no relationship on offer. So he's not chasing me per se, just the sex. I think that's prob what he was referring to about it being 'safe'. Blimey you lot are like my therapist which is good because I would never admit to my actual therapist that I was messaging a guy like that

Oh shit gast I'm sorry you're feeling this way too.

Oh, I quite like my new iron. He's funny and chatty and seems so normal!

MrsRolandRat, the worst date I went on was with a pilot. He was so pompous and entitled! eugh. REally fond of himself. Dressed well, and tlal and slim but unattractive and with three enormous red spots on his neck. Yuck. Judged me for drinking (two glasses of wine, I needed them). Then he kept coughing and I asked if he had asthma and he nearly took my ear drum off correcting me.

Oh! I just got a message from MrEloquent! I am and and confused. But mostly . For now.
Need wine...

Haha 314, that sounds like 99% of the pilots I work with. Pompous twats!

Eugh OLD is fucking tedious. Already bored of the "hey how are you" blah blah blah.

I thought I'd found a decent one this time.

Haha 314, that sounds like 99% of the pilots I work with. Pompous twats!

Eugh OLD is fucking tedious. Already bored of the "hey how are you" blah blah blah.

I thought I'd found a decent one this time.

Haha 314, that sounds like 99% of the pilots I work with. Pompous twats!

Eugh OLD is fucking tedious. Already bored of the "hey how are you" blah blah blah.

I thought I'd found a decent one this time.

Apologies for the multiple posts