Step right up, it's dating thread 97

[MyGastIsFlabbered]

We don't half get through these at speed!

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now)

Just wondering about Soho H Mrmusic etc & how they try to end things before they can get hurt - @about 2-3 months...
I had some other insight but it escapes me...
Oh yeah - mid 50s men much the same as younger - dysfunctional, IDWAR or sweet shop mentality. .. :(

Totally agree with you Waving risk of hurt is worth the risk but these men should stop pretending to be looking for a relationship because their behaviour makes being hurt a certainty! :(

Nothing wrong with a rebound as long as it helps clear your head and not make matters worse. Do you want to see him again Waving?

Oh no, don't agree with me, I don't want to be right! It is slightly depressing. I take your two points on board though Sassy and I am definitely trying to deliver less moose burgers, and set my own standards a bit more but I'm not even getting to that stage at the moment.

Still, all I can do is keep plugging away, meeting people and learning things and hope that I'll eventually meet someone that I like enough and that likes me enough and things will just work out pretty naturally. That's the dream, aynway.

Waving Glad you had a good date! Think it was probably just what you needed. How are you feeling about Soho today?

Sparkly That's a shame but I agree, maybe give him another go to see if there's anything there?

And, I have to say, being on this thread is so helpful. The next time I'm approaching a relationship, I am going to be so much more sorted and prepared.

Oh god, they really are identical. Bee claimed to be looking for a forever relationship then admitted to me on our date he'd only been single a few weeks, and had cheated on his previous partner because of alleged abuse by her. Then couldn't even maintain a friendship with me, let alone anything else. ARGH.

Oh bollocky bollocks! Just seen on FB that Mr2015 is going to an event on Sunday that I was planning to go to
I've been meaning to go to this thing for ages, finally plucked up the courage to go as part of my whole "getting out there, meeting new people" thing and he's going to bloody be there! I really, really don't want to see him at the moment. If I ask him how he is and he tells me about the new GF, I'll probably just cry in his face....and it's a smallish event so won't be able to avoid him. And even if I do, I'm going to be all tense and weird which is going to make it tricky to socialise with anyone else. And what if he brings his new GF?! That would be horrendous! But then, there's no telling that he will definitely be there...people say they are going to events all the time that they don't actually go to. And I don't want to miss out on this. I'd have to wait for a month for the next one and might not be able to go anyway.

This is so ironic, a week or so ago I would have been over the moon about the possibility of seeing him and now I just want him to fuck off for a bit...

I just asked for my last two posts to be withdrawn as I'm worried my abusive STBXH might find them.

Waving, I'm exactly the same, I had a few relationships before my ex-H, who I was with for over 10 years, so this is all new, and I thought I was a good judge of character, but am swiftly finding out that I'm not!

Dunno waving! Part of me thinks, "fuck it, why should I change my plans just cos I might bump into him?" and that I should just go and style it out. But then another part of me thinks it would just be too awful and painful to see him right now. And also, I've realised that my status on the event is "interested" and if I change it to "going" now, he might think that I am just going because he is, which couldn't be further from the truth! And it feels weird not to message him to say "hey, are you going to that thing? Me too!" as I would with any other friend. But then he must know that I am interested in going and hasn't mentioned it to me either. Modern life is rubbish sometimes. I wish I didn't know that he was seeing someone and I wish that I didn't know where he might be!

Anyway,well done on all your irons! It is a bit off of IDWAR not to message you. I think I got bombarded with messages when I joined OKC...you always do as newbie on a dating site, I think and then it calms down a bit.

Folk can't you corner a friend into being your plus one at that event? I think you should totally go!

Waving, yes that is rude, but then you had a good time with him last night so not too bad for a rebound.

Waves to everyone else!

MrTheatre and I are planning a date for tomorrow or Friday. Perhaps both if everything goes according to plan. We have been messaging for about a month now so it is high time we meet up. Eeeek I hate the pressure that comes with the long messaging!

TinyGrey has finally got the message that he was being OTT so he is now pacing himself. Good boy. Might land him a date next week.

Since joining Tinder last Sunday I have scored over 130 matches!!! I had no idea there were that many people on that app! I am talking to a couple of them, will see where that goes.. Watch this space I am back in the game!

I've presently got five, but I deleted a whole lot, and I don't often right swipe. I think it would be much more if I did, as I've experimentally right swiped and match with all sorts!

Not dating tonight, but out at a comedy fundraiser with my favourite humans, and currently chatting to my POF iron.

I am going to go I think. On the basis of 1) he might not go anyway 2) it's actually going to be bigger than I though and 3) I really want to go and I think it'll be really good for me. And actually even seeing him might be good in a way? Dunno. I'm going to see if I can rope a friend or my sister into coming with me but it's a bit late notice now. I changed my status on the event on FB to "going" so he must know and I really hope that if he was planning to bring his new GF, he'd let me know beforehand...he would, right?

130 matches! Blimey! I deleted and reinstalled my profile last night (I like to "purge" it every once in a while ) and currently have 0 matches. I have no irons at the moment either, even the weirdy ones have fizzled away. The pessimistic part of me says that I will be obsessing over exes for everymore. The optimistic part says that it's usually when things get really bad and lose all hope that I "meet" someone so fingers crossed...

Hi all, can I join? I am at work so can't post much but just wanted to ask Waving if most of her ok Cupid newbies were from Morocco, North Africa area? I had circa 10 messages on one night, I think Monday from that area which is mad. I wondered if they had opened up the website to that area which might explain it.

Now I'm just jealous.... 😆