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Original poster

Dh has done it again

132 replies

jampots · 29/12/2006 14:13

Initially we were going to scotland for a couple of days between xmas and new year then that was too far so we looked at closer for an overnight which bizarrely morphed into a day at Warwick Castle - today! Couldnt book tickets online so went along admittedly just after midday, the car park was full so I thought we could park on the other side and walk through a different entrance. Dh bearing in mind is whining and yelling at me because the car park is full which is my fault entirely. Unsure of how many hours to park the car for (pay and display) he asked me - ive never actually been into the castle so have no idea how long which i told him. He didnt want to make the decision so huffed off and left me the keys to teh car! He decided to take the train home. So armed with no money to pay for entrance tickets we;ve had to drive home. Dont have a clue where he is now though,

OP posts:
Dinosaur · 29/12/2006 15:02

Can you do something tomorrow without him?

Guttersnipe · 29/12/2006 15:05

Sounds like the sort of disaster dh and I usually manage to concoct between us. FWIW in future, Warwick Castle is a full day out!

Original poster
jampots · 29/12/2006 15:13

yes we (the children and I) are off to teh castle tomorrow morning!

OP posts:
NOELallie · 29/12/2006 15:14

Bug*er me Jampots! What an arse! I hope he apologises to you very soon. My DH can be a bit of a 'joy leech' at times too - he can't cope with all three of ours together with or with me - he's had 3 days off while I've been working and is pretty close to the end of his rope but never ever has he spoken to me or the kids like that, nor has he ever abandoned us. Twat! You just can't do that to people that you care about.

Original poster
jampots · 29/12/2006 15:14

I will spend dh's would be entrance price (about £12) on ice slide tickets for the children !

OP posts:
Original poster
jampots · 29/12/2006 15:15

noellallie - he has abandoned us many times. Once when ds was about a week old afer me having c/s - en route to my mums house - I had to get in and drive

OP posts:
NOELallie · 29/12/2006 15:15

Sorry that should have said 'with or without me'.

Guttersnipe · 29/12/2006 15:16

Good idea. Honestly, I don't know if it helps at all, but what you experienced today really is very similar to what dh and I do to each other (usually, I have to admit, induced by my behaviour ) so you are not the only couple. Is there any way you can heal today's rift and let him come with you tomorrow? or is that really not what you want?

NOELallie · 29/12/2006 15:17

Why does he do that? Does he ever explain or apologise. You must be a saint to put up with it....

Original poster
jampots · 29/12/2006 15:17

nah he's a knob - he will only f* tomorrow up anyway. Obviously if he really wants to come i cant stop him but 20 mins in teh car as a captive might be more than I can bear. At least at home I can get away from him

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 29/12/2006 15:17

jampots

This is not the first time he has pulled this crap is it?.

I would ask him (when he is calm and if you are feeling brave enough) what his actions are teaching the children?. Damaging lessons are being imparted here and they're learning fast. After all they learn about relationships first and foremost from their own parents.

How would you feel if your children went on to pick partners just like him?.

If this is indeed representative of day to day life I have to ask why you are with him.

AttilaTheMeerkat · 29/12/2006 15:21

"You must be a saint to put up with it...."

Or alternatively so run down and defeated by it all that a way out or a way forward cannot be readily seen. A joy leech he is indeed. Goodness only knows what your own self esteem is like Jampots.

2nervesnapartridgeinapeartree · 29/12/2006 15:23

If this was my Dh I would arrange all future days out without him. If he likes it that way then at least those that do go won't have a 'joy leech' around to spoil it. If however he wants to come I would refuse until he promises to behave and put his children's feelings and needs before his own temper and whims.

Of course I have no idea how your Dh would react to this, he sounds like a bit of a bully.
Im sorry you and the kids had such a crap day.

NOELallie · 29/12/2006 15:26

Well yes Atilla - that's the other way of putting it . Sometime it just seems simpler to put up with stuff but it's not in the long run.

12yeargap · 29/12/2006 16:05

Uggh.

Horrible, horrible man, I'm so sorry.

The bit about it being 'your fault' that the car park was full rang a few bells, DH tried that in the Lake District in the summer, threw a massive hissy fit because he couldn't park, and apparently I 'should have known', because I'd been to that village once, about five years before.

Tossers, aren't they?

Monkeytrousers · 29/12/2006 16:25

Absolutely agree, what a tosser - but WHY is he doing this? It can't be making him feel better about himself and his family.

Has he always been like this Jampots or has it been a steady increase in mega strops over soem time? If so I'd try to get to the bottom of it. Ask him why he's not happy..

PanicPressiePants · 29/12/2006 16:33

Am so shocked. Wouldn't speak to him for days, thats if I allowed him back in at all.

NAB3 · 29/12/2006 16:38

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SherlockLGJ · 29/12/2006 16:39

OH Jampots

Why are you still with this man, he seems to take great delight in upsetting you. Does he have any redeeming features ????

nutcracker · 29/12/2006 17:00

Jammie, you are far too nice to be with such a low life tosspot, why exactly are you still with him.

I would have run him over with the bloody car.

idontlikecrusts · 29/12/2006 17:05

I didn't realise your dh could be as much of a wanker as mine.

Poor you jampots and thanks for offering me your support on one of my threads.

This is exactly the sort of thing Ade would do.

hunkermunker · 29/12/2006 17:11

Oh, Jampots

You're such fun, and he is not.

I wish you had someone as nice as you

mummytosteven · 29/12/2006 17:33

why did you have no money to pay for entrance tickets? just wondering if he's keeping you on a bit of a chain moneywise?

Original poster
jampots · 29/12/2006 17:40

i think if it wasnt all so ridiculous it would be very upsetting. Here's the latest:

One of us needed to go to the supermarket as we are akin to Mother Hubbards cupboard, so possibly to redeem himself he suggested we all go (instead of just me). This sounded like a reasonable idea as I wouldnt then have to bring hte "wrong things" back. So eventually end up in Tesco carpark - I was driving as usual and spotted a woman loading her car right next to the P&C spaces (regular space though . So I pulled over and indicated to wait for her. In the meantime dh decided I was causing trouble despite the fact that cars were passing me by within the car park and I was a lazy bitch (granted I am lazy but not the point). So eventually I parked despite his prediction that I wouldnt get it in. Then dh decided he wasnt coming in he was staying in the car! so I said fine and played along with it. As I was walking over to fetch a trolley he yelled over at me to lock the car - he was walking home!!!! and [despondent snigger] "OK - see you at home then" I called back and went on my way. Took him an hour to get back!!! Freak!

I asked him when we returned what possessed him to do that and he said "I cant stand you" !

OP posts:
NOELallie · 29/12/2006 17:41

Oh jampots.... that is truly awful.