Step inside it's the Dating Thread 93

[SweetPotato1]

Looks like this needed to be kicked off again..

The Rules

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin
3. Do no invest emotionally too soon
4. It's all BS until it actually happens
5. Trust your gut instinct
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you
8. If it's not fun- stop
9. Loo update is mandatory

10. No dating the thread

waving yes, tell me to. I appreciate it. I hope it goes well with H. And if it doesn't there are other men. We are slipping in to what Bear wanted all along. He's a Peter Pan in his 40s with no children, no xw, no ties to any one city (in fact he does move between two). I've said my piece and he nodded and was respectful of that in his words. But we are just slipping towards what he wanted and SAID he wanted. For us to sleep with each other, meet up whenever we could but for it not to be 'complicated'. Well for me that sort of shabby arrangement is very fucking complicated!

ps, I haven't actually slept with him. yet nO, ignore that yet. I haven't. I won't.

Handy, yes, I will have to engineer an actual RL meeting, I don't want to have loads of these gorgeous online chats, just to find we don't click in real life.

Waving and 314, why can't you give up on Soho and Bear respectively? It's fascinating that you both have potentially lovely blokes in the wings, but are drawn back to them. Men love bitches, huh? Or women do?!

Lose them! Get good ones!

Haha Tanya - spot on. Note to self : dullness over assholiness.

Popcorn has not sent anything yet. And my ex has been bombing my Facebook feed with pictures of him and the new girl (who physically is just my doppelgänger) and messages of love for the world and general happiness. Rawwwwrrr.

On the plus side: MrIkea sent a sweet new year text at precisely 0.12am. And I went for my first sunrise run in ages.

Happy new year all - hope 2016 is code for awesome dates and no more ghosters/wankers/pricks of all kind!

Nooooo, not dullness, just men who roughly know their own minds and what they want. They must exist, they must!

#spotthenewbie

Waving we definitely are in the same boat - I am kind of afraid to miss out on something if I do not get the chance to sort it out with Popcorn. Because well there was that spark.. So I will be waiting until mid jan before arranging coffee if he does not come up with the idea first. Now I am just trying not to hold my breath for an answer from him. I will see if he is actually into me.. or not. And then completely move on if that is the case. In the meantime I will keep on messaging the others.

Do you know, thinking of Bear and soho and popcorn, I'm just going over some of the things H mentioned in passing, how his x-w who remarried and had another child, invited H to spend christmas day with her, her husband H's teenagers and the younger sibling of his teenagers. He told me he thought about what to get the younger child. (He gave this more thought than my kids' father gave what to buy his own kids). And a cog is shifting in my brain. Now I knwo these things go two ways, and H might go on a second date with me and be the one to decide that I'm not right for him.... but i do really want a decent, good humoured, family orientated type of man with a sensible job!. H talked about skyping his parents who he seems to have a good relationship with despite not living in the same country. Same with his sister and her husband and their nephews who all got a brief mention. His nephews visited him and were shown the bright lights and the big city before he sent them back on a plane sad that he only got to see them once a year. FFS. I want a man like that who isn't terrified of my children, or other people's. No more peter pans.

My head is thinking about Bear and I feel simultaneously bedazzled and cross with him.

Lol at Kondo-ing. I'm on that thread too, and I'm watching luther too! And attracting arty/musical types with no cash. We're all merging in to one person. :-p I've had an artist bf as well and omg that was a disaster. I've my own house and job and he hadn't a pot to piss in.

edited, I mean H might not want a third date with me. And, I might not want a third date with him. What I have to remember is that there are normal men out there.

And what's weird, is I'm a musical type (although a charity comms person by career) and I've accidentally attracted a seriously clever science type. Opposites...

I haven't managed to get to actual date arranging yet, but he messaged me again this afternoon, part of which was "I've really enjoyed chatting with you and would like to continue getting to know you." I'm working on it...

Another vote for Idris here. Sigh.

tanyadm another one here who is a musical type (was by career but not now) also attracting mainly science types! Oddness!!

Did anyone mention Idris?

Stop, it's lashing rain here... I've to start getting ready quite soon and it'd be easier to just settle in to episode 3 of series two. No spoilers :-p
I've to watch everything on netflix before they take the specials off the bbc iplayer.

Well had 2 happy new year messages, one from mr sex and one from me rugby. Mr sex has moved on to whatsapp and is quite frequent with his messages and wants to meet up one afternoon soon!

Mr rugby is troubling me though, I know he works shifts and lives about 30 minutes away so it's difficult to arrange a meet up but (please don't think bad of me!) we have a couple of mutual Facebook friends so I know who he actually is and on his fb profile are photos of a wife and kids who he has never mentioned! I don't know whether to just ignore and see if it comes up or mention that we have mutual friends and see what he says??

Haha Waving that may well be the lawyer's curse that we are experiencing.
Though I would say it am more on the arty side and keep attracting financial auditors, space engineers (!) and mathematicians.

Would love a drummer or photographer or writer me..

Yup, lawyer here too, Waving.
Still not a word from popcorn .. MrIkea though now is texting funny stuff ..to be continued

choccy please give me the low down with mrsex. Am really interested. This is because I've hit a wall with potential dates, and have been messaging a guy who is up for something a whole lot more casual. He's currently abroad. And here's the thing: I'm considering it. Has anyone actually done this?

Am I completely mad to even consider this??

Forgot to say choc could it be pictures of a stbexwife?

If not then that's outrageous.

Handy, I'm beginning to consider it with somebody. I'd have to say ''you're not what I'm looking for". I wouldn't want them thinking I was some poor sap who was going to fall in love with them. I think somebody attractive to you, and nice enough, but not that big a thinker.... I don't know. Any ideas?

I struggle with it though because that group of men that I'd want to sleep with overlaps pretty neatly with the group of men that I'd consider going out with, seeing how it went at least.

I'm about to go out now and I have a rain mac over my nice long belted coat. I look an absolute STATE. If he could see me now, he'd run.

Bear texted me and I was about to respond and then I thought, no, I'm going to give H my attention today fgs.