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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The worst bit of being cheated on?

136 replies

MadeofCheese · 02/12/2015 12:34

For me, the worst bit is that he knew he'd done it and was still doing it and he continued to have sex with me, while I was blissfully unaware. I feel very violated phyically by that part.

OP posts:
wintersocks · 03/12/2015 21:21

So much of this resonates with me -shitty background with untrustworthy men in it, exh was the first man I'd truly trusted. The betrayal and lies hurt the most, the fact that I still look back on bits of what I'd thought were happy times with young dcs and wonder was he cheating then or then - I'll never know. Also the humiliation, pick me dance, going to relate while he was still secretly with OW and sitting there while he slagged me off Sad

I feel mostly ok now and hope one day to trust and love again. Sometimes I worry people wonder if there's something wrong with me, that made him leave - I hate that feeling. Shame I guess.

SpinachJelly · 03/12/2015 21:40

Our sons are now all in their 20's. We'll never share the joy of grandchildren together.

littleunderdog · 03/12/2015 22:39

The thing that upsets me about it is the way being cheated on (and not knowing) infantilizes you. My husband treated me like a baby all our married life, gaslighting me and saying I was imagining things, was paranoid etc. And he wasn't the only one: I kept going to our male family doctor with constant vaginal infections - especially while pregnant - and he never suggested infidelity might be a reason. One time he even told me I had to get my husband to come in and be treated too, as if it was all my fault for having an infection that had spread to my husband.
i suppose one good thing is i do feel like a grown up now.

BreakfastLunchPasta · 03/12/2015 22:55

This is such a sad thread. I want to give you all the most massive hug.

It's years and years ago now, but the worst thing for me was how it changed me as a person. For the first few years (which were also the first few years of my adorable dds life, and should have been magical) I was so angry and bitter, and tbh a bit crazy and depressed, and bordering on alcoholism too. I had been such a happy, loving, sunny person; I hate that he/they did that to me.
I managed to leave the anger and bitterness behind, though it took immense effort and a lot of time.
Now, nearly 16 years later, I find it hard to give my (very loving and devoted) dh the level of trust that he deserves, especially eg when it comes to being out with colleagues, because my ex cheated with his colleague. I don't like feeling jealous and possessive :(

Justaboy · 03/12/2015 23:44

This is a very sad thread and commiserations to everyone on here. My wife cheated on me but it wasn't for long and I knew she was doing it, long story and I won't bore you all with the details. We're now divorced and that's that!

But on the threads there is of course the OW who must in most all instances know that she is with married or in a relationship man, and yet she takes him in and has a set up with him knowing that he's involved with another woman.

How or what do you think of women who are in that position as the OW do they not think of the damage their relationship is causing or do they just feel so, I don't know, maybe overwhelmed, in lurve with him or whatever?.

I can understand a man succumbing to temptation of sex with another woman which seems to be the more prevalent case, but surely the OW is part of that issue or problem call it what you will?.

BTW I hope any of that wording doesn't cause any upset or offence to anyone I'm just trying to understand these situations.

Baconyum · 03/12/2015 23:52

Justaboy

There are posters on mn that give it 'its the spouse that betrayed you not ow/om'.

Unless the ow/om reasonably had no idea that they are the ow/om I blame them equally! I'll get flamed for that but anyone that knowingly shags someone who is in a committed relationship with someone else especially where children are just as despicable as the cheating spouse!

There are posters on this thread who have been propositioned by mm - and turned them down because ITS WRONG! this is not difficult and it is not rocket science!

There are rare occasions where the ow/om has no idea and couldn't know. A friend of mine supported another friend of hers who discovered at her husbands funeral that he had a whole other family at the other end of the country. Neither had any idea of the other. His job involved a lot of travel and meant he was living a double life. Awful situation.

But most of the time the ow/om knows full well what's going on!

janaus · 03/12/2015 23:55

Just A Boy. You have put it right, I do not blame the ex OW as my DH tried to do. He made the choice. But she knew he was married. What makes them cross that line. Then after a few goes wants nothing to do with him.

SilentBob · 04/12/2015 00:08

That she stepped into my shoes.

'Our' friends were now 'their' friends.

'Our' restaurants were now 'their' restaurants.

'Our' dog was now 'their' dog.

Ridiculous but true. My life as I Had known it for 16 years was over yet his carried on almost exactly the same- the only thing that changed was the woman by his side.

5 years on, happier than I have been for years, clear (at the moment) of depression and in the most fabulous relationship I could ever wish for and even now I do not have friends (old or new.) I can't. I just can't.

PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 04/12/2015 00:50

I'm sorry, I don't have statistics, but the anecdotal evidence that I do have suggests that, A Lot Fewer Times than you think, the OW knows he's married. One mainly hears about the brazen ones, the ones who win the "Pick Me Dance", etc. And those are a very specific shitty sub-set.

But justvthink fir a moment about the very nature of the core of lying bastards: they lie. They've successfully lied to you for a lot longer than they have to that latest bit of skirt. There are so many instances of women who don't know they're an OW. Because the H lied to them too. And, not, like, actually living with the guy and knowing him for umpteen years, or having access to his post, or xomputer oasswords, etc, they didn't see through the lies. And many may (or may not) have heard some version of the truth but ishe doesn't have a lot of choice. (Sorry, but I know of at least two sexually harassed women in job situations). Bear in kind, the fucktard who feels entitled to cheat on his wife, the love of his life, mother to his children, etc, frequently doesn't stop the "entitlement" attitude at general decency or even legality. Consent is based on do many things, and one of them is knowledge and understanding.

And there's a reason we only hear about the brazen, et al. It's still all our fault, no matter what we do. Earlier, I asked if any of you, who have been hit upon by married men since you're now single, have told the relevant wives, many of whom were your friends, what had happened.

Crickets chirped. Indeed, the only follow-up, if you want to call it that, is a lament that, in so doing (albeit, being done to, so to speak), some of your own support network is diminished.

And, you know, I am saddened by this. But, in the same way, I am angry. Doesn't that make you angry too?!? That male assholiness can not only go unpunished but, as a bonus, taint and diminish a women's own legitimate relationships? How can this be acceptable?!? I seriously boggle!

I'm not asking you to spend any amount of time worrying about the OWs. Really I'm not! And, I seriously don't know what the percentage of unknowing/unwilling OWn would be. Although, i should imagine, if every woman who'd been lied to, sexually coerced, raped, paid, promised, or even just [unsuccessfully] propositioned by a married scumbag suddenly woke up tomorrow in a society where they'd get to tell their story with no repercussions, the statistics would be vastly different.

All I'm asking is that you keep the bulk of the anger where it needs to stay: with the lying scumbags. The ones who KNEW exactly what it was doing to YOU, and did it anyway.

And the system that places all the blame on women.

PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 04/12/2015 00:51

Feck, that was long. Xmas Blush

Baconyum · 04/12/2015 01:01

My anecdotal evidence is different. Most affairs I have personal knowledge of the ow/om knew the mm/mw was married/in a committed relationship.

People who believe the 'they don't understand me' 'we don't sleep together' 'the marriage has really been over for ages we just haven't got around to making it formal' bullshit should grow up and get a clue! And say to mm/mw no I'm not going to get into a relationship with you because you're not single!

StarkyTheDirewolf · 04/12/2015 02:33

I never blamed the ow (plural) per se, but when I did eventually find out about the sheer numbers involved, and more than one of them had been a friend/aquintance /work colleague, I was angry and upset initially, but more than anything, after a while, I realised that they'd done me a favour. Realising that it wasn't just random women he'd picked up and charmed, but in seeing how manipulative he actually was, and how selfish. Because it showed that he didn't actually care one jot if his dalliances spilled over into my life. And when that penny dropped, no amount of sorry, grand gestures, tears and tantrums could have pulled me back.

isthismylifenow · 04/12/2015 06:36

I asked if any of you, who have been hit upon by married men since you're now single, have told the relevant wives, many of whom were your friends, what had happened.

No, I haven't. I just can't. I can't put her through the pain that I have had to endure. I am barely coping with my situation anyway, and as I mentioned upthread I have already starting losing friends as I think they think I am a threat to their marriage in some way now. It is just ridiculous in my eyes though, I am the very same person that I was a little while ago when I did wear a ring on my finger. 2 months later now, I am not wearing it, and some are treating me as though I am now a completely different person because of it. Yes, I have changed somewhat, I am going through one of the worst times of my life, and I have to think of my dc and myself before anyone else now. Selfish, maybe yes, but if this whole experience has taught me one thing, and that is that I need to look out for myself as well now.

How do you go and tell a friend who is trying to support you that her husband is a scumbag? If my situation were different, as in I were in a different place at the moment, ie not just trying to get myself through the day...yes I may have told her. But at this moment in time, I just can't do it. Maybe I too am not a good friend right now. I just don't feel I am to be held responsible for his actions, that I have not encouraged. Why must I be the one to devastate her life. I haven't done anything wrong.

novemberchild · 04/12/2015 06:45

The hardest thing for me...so many things.

Knowing he planned in advance to cheat on me when I was going into hospital for a big operation. He admitted he bought condoms and downloaded sex apps days before because he knew I would be away.

Knowing that he hid his wedding ring when the person he had sex with was on the way to his hotel.

Finding photos of him posing in our bedroom with his dick out.

Knowing he sent nude photos to other people and 'talked dirty' to them. He never acted like that or talked like that with me.

That he lied for almost 2 years.

That he called me paranoid and questioned my mental health.

That he continued to try to conceive, having unprotected sex with me and claimed he did it because 'he used a condom with the other person so there was no risk'...

That he is still lying to me, blaming me and refusing to move out when I am pregnant. I told him I would only consider trying again if he stopped lying. He offered that he would 'stop lying about the big things', and thinks so little of me that would be acceptable.

It's not, though.

novemberchild · 04/12/2015 06:48

Oh, and that I am now a 'crazy bitch' for telling him to leave until he thinks he can actually tell the truth.

I may be a crazy bitch, but I know what made me crazy.

isthismylifenow · 04/12/2015 06:55

November

You are not a crazy bitch. He is a lying deceitful bastard.

ravenmum · 04/12/2015 08:45

the OW do they not think of the damage their relationship is causing or do they just feel so, I don't know, maybe overwhelmed, in lurve with him or whatever?
Like the husband or wife, the affair partner is working hard to convince him- or herself that what they are doing is forgivable or OK really because ... blah blah.

I can understand a man succumbing to temptation of sex with another woman which seems to be the more prevalent case, but surely the OW is part of that issue or problem call it what you will?
(In my case the OW was also cheating on her husband. Including her, I know of three cheating wives among my friends and family, but no cheating husbands. It might seem more prevalent here because more women post.)
I didn't know the OP, have never met her and want as little to do with her as possible, including spending very little time thinking about her. I vaguely think that she must be a bit thick / desperate / slutty / all of the above, but if it hadn't been her it would have been someone else.

TheKnackeredChef · 04/12/2015 13:19

Ravenmum, I think you mean OW rather than OP there, don't you? It took me a minute! Grin

ravenmum · 04/12/2015 13:34

Eeek, yes! Sorry!

TheKnackeredChef · 04/12/2015 13:38

If it helps, Raven, in my case I knew the OW rather well and she was indeed all of the above. It must be an OW thing.

CeliaSeal · 04/12/2015 14:46

In my case the OW knew she was becoming involved with a married man. And of course, her behaviour was completely wrong. But she didn't betray me. My husband did that.

MeganBacon · 04/12/2015 15:32

Him making me think I was going insane. All his talk about what an honourable decent good Catholic he was, moralising about the difference between right and wrong, when he was opportunistically shagging anyone he could.

Him taking advantage of me financially when he knew how destroyed I was.

The neighbour telling me about the women he had been having round whilst I was at work for the last TWO YEARS. Why didn't he tell me two years previous?

Also actually, going to counselling and the counsellor seeming to believe him, that I genuinely was nuts and he was such a reasonable good hearted bloke. I'm outraged at her still. God he was convincing though. AT least I had the strength to put a stop to that before shuffling off into anonymous obscurity and away from all these people he had convinced and living a very quiet low key life for a while.

It's 13 years ago for me though and a very distant memory - life does rebuild itself I promise. It's just one chapter of my history now, nothing more. Wishing lots of strength to all those for whom it's still fresh and awful.

northernpixie · 04/12/2015 20:19

The betrayal, the lies, the re-writing of history.

It had been going on for just over a year after 25+ years of "happy" marriage. I was told that:

It just seemed to happen and I just went along with it
I didn’t think anyone would find out and that no one would get hurt
We are really in love - this is the real thing
He is such a good and honourable person, you would like him if you got to know him
He is so good and hounourable he stays with his wife and family even though he doesn’t want to
The other affair he had was different, she seduced him
We can't have been happy otherwise I wouldn’t have done it
etc etc I have a long list

I quite recently looked at the Ashley Madison member details (that website for people who want an affair), I wasn’t really surprised to find someone with roughly his height, age, weight and post-code centered on the town where he lives had registered 3 months before the affair started, not his real name as the username but that of his treasured dog!

Justaboy · 04/12/2015 21:59

novemberchild That is an awful thing to happened him meeting up whilst you were in hospital, that's just downright despicable:-(

I trust you are long rid of him.

Nodramallama · 04/12/2015 22:56

The whole betrayal, the fact he told her that we had split up long before we did.
He had made up a completely new life for me, one which I wish I had.

He made me feel as though I was going crazy for even thinking that he was cheating even after I found condoms in his bag (that he wasn't using with her, or anyone else) as he got a different ow pregnant then made her get an abortion.

But what hurt most was that he used to take dcs round to hers so they could go and play happy families and pretend she was their mum.
He then moved in with her changed his number so I couldn't contact him and used to tell me he had to concentrate on his new relationship instead of seeing dcs.
Yes I done the pick me dance, I loved him and yet he done that to me.
Still after two years I still feel the pain I felt when I found out I've stayed single and don't trust anyone I've closed myself off from friends and family as I don't want to get hurt anymore
And he still to this day Denys anything ever happend and insists that I get over it as its all in my, head charming ay?

One thing though that does make me feel better is that he is now cheating on the ow living in a single room that he cannot even stand up straight in.