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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

DRY 9!!!!!

999 replies

CheesyNachos · 11/10/2015 20:39

The DRY 8 thread suddenly came to an end! 1000 messages before we knew it.

THis is the thread for those who are abstaining and who want to abstain from alcohol. :)

All are welcome.

Previous thread is here.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2432985-DRY-8?

OP posts:
Seabiscotti · 22/11/2015 16:14

In my case the restaurant is slways the start of the night. Unless a table is booked for a late time, they seem to want you in and out.

Brighit · 22/11/2015 16:17

As I see it the problem with pubs is that alcohol is the main focus. Well obviously there is the social aspect but other than that, it's booze. At least a restaurant has food to focus on.

TeapotDictator · 22/11/2015 17:58

Hello all. I wouldn't have gone on a night out to a pub in the first few weeks, but I don't think you have to avoid them for good. I'm happy to go to one now although will ALWAYS want to know that I can make a sharp exit when I'm ready to. Alcohol is the lubricant that makes you not give a shit whether you go home now or later, whereas when you're sober if you want to leave, you WANT TO LEAVE RIGHT NOW Grin

This is a great post from Hip Sobriety re. any sense of FOMO here, in case any of you fancy reading.

I've just started tackling my eating, which recently had become a bit compulsive/addictive in a way which made me feel uncomfortable. I've finally sort of woken up to the fact that I cannot eat sugar and bready things in a normal fashion, so have decided to cut them from my diet. This time last week I was grazing non stop and thinking about food all the time; it's made such a difference to just cut it out. I think that for me - a bit sadly - this is going to be the same as with the booze; impossible to moderate and far easier to not have it at all.

Seabiscotti · 22/11/2015 18:53

I know teapot and I will be avoiding pubs for a while now. Thanks for the link. I definitely have fomo and fear I will be boring. Interesting read.

Original poster
CheesyNachos · 23/11/2015 10:19

I know it is not always practical but I tend to meet friends now for lunch only. The emphasis is less on drinking (or not drinking) and I usually then have to do the school run so I have to drive the car. Itis more restful for me to not even have the possibility of alcohol on the table.

But it's not always possible to only meet for lunch, I know.

OP posts:
Seabiscotti · 23/11/2015 11:04

It was lunch CheesyBlush

My friends all work, so very rare to get together on a week day. Sad

laughingatweather · 23/11/2015 18:27

Hi, I posted under a previous NN ages ago on a previous thread but I left as I couldn't manage even a couple of days and felt too embarrassed.

Now, day 11 which even a few weeks ago I'd never have believed I could achieve. And to be honest, I'm not really struggling or having lots of cravings which is a bit odd as I was drinking 50 plus units a week for the last 6/7 years (God that sounds awful).

But I do feel quite low sometimes and a bit tearful, particularly in the evenings. Did anyone else experience this?.

I've had serious depression in the past and am worrying I'm becoming ill again but it has just been since I stopped drinking so I don't know if it's a normal adjustment reaction or something?.

gingersam · 23/11/2015 18:36

Hi all just checking in and reading with interest i think the telling people theme is interesting I think I might avoid it so i can still stealth drink as i fi d it scary to think I will never be able to do it again. What i found was that it didn't come as a surprise to many people! Clearly i am not the. Subtle drunk i thought i was! Things are monumentally crappy at the moment dd ( i keep putting ds by mistake) drugs are having side effects of not sleeping and mood swings we are trying to buy a house and work is crazy busy. It was a family birthday yesterday and I had a drink as apparently toasting with water is dull.to be fair the don't know how bad things are for me. My favourite non alcoholic drink is grapefruit soda and a dash of angostura bitters. Aromatic and not too sweet good pub drink as tall with ice bloody hell hang on is that stuff got alcohol? I am off to google it love to all x

gingersam · 23/11/2015 18:38

Laughing
I think that is a totally normal reaction you are doing so well, never be ashamed keep posting and get support no judgement here x

Brighit · 23/11/2015 19:59

Fantastic laughing, well done on eleven days. I would say the feeling low and tearful is completely normal. Alcohol does strange things to the body and mind, can take a while to find some sort of balance again. See how it goes and you can always contact your gp if it persists?

3phase · 24/11/2015 07:30

Hi everyone

I hope your DD is OK GingerSam

Well done laughing

I'm on Day 16 today and completely relate to feeling low. To be fair I'm not sure I picked the best time (if there is such a thing) to stop drinking but I'm still waiting for the elated, focussed feeling I thought I'd 'deserve' by now!!
I'm ill with what's turned into a chest infection and still want to crawl into a dark, quiet box most of the time.... DD has fortunately recovered and went back to nursery yesterday so that's something. I have a mountain of paperwork to deal with left from last week when she was poorly so I've cancelled everything I had in my diary today and am just going to slowly plough through it all. At least I'm not hungover. If I was hungover I'd be less able to do that than I am ill!

Original poster
CheesyNachos · 24/11/2015 13:43

Hi everyone. Just checking in as have a shocker of a cold and feel dreadful.

Hope everyone is fine. Thanks

Anyone read today's MN blog of the day? Written by a blogger called Rachel in Real Life and details her recovery from alcoholism. She is so brave and writes so well. And her DS is a gorgeous little poppet.

Hugs everyone. I am feeling so so grateful to have you all here, posting, offering support.xxxxx

OP posts:
3phase · 24/11/2015 14:00

Will have a look now Cheesy Feel better!

3phase · 24/11/2015 14:01

Sorry Cheesy - probably being dim - how do I find the blog of the day?! Blush

3phase · 24/11/2015 14:02

Yep, being dim. Ignore me. Just spotted it. Duh!

Seabiscotti · 24/11/2015 16:42

Hope you feel better soon 3

I read the blog Cheesy. I get what she was saying. I feel like people will think I am stupid and boring, and need a drink or three to bring me out of my shell. It is not the only reason, but it is one.

BitterLemons1 · 24/11/2015 17:05

Hello all,

Just wanted to check in here - I'm on Day 4 myself. Going surprisingly ok so far but I have a bit of a dread that I'll suddenly change my mind and return to the bottle. Hoping I can hang around here with you nice people in the hope of avoiding that...Hmm

Lucy2610 · 24/11/2015 17:10

sorry fell off thread Blush
Cheesy you're welcome re Sally Marlow webinar - she was ace wasn't she? Me too on the drink driving Sad
I can't believe we're a month away from Xmas already Shock Have sober advent calendar lined up for blog in December as I know what a tricky time of year it is for us sober warriors. Gorgeous famous sober people to look at and remind us how cool we are Grin Wink Off to read blog of the day! :)

donajimena · 24/11/2015 20:36

Hello all. Im just checking in to say excitedly that its day 15 for me! I feel like a new kind of 'normal' bitter welcome! You will get lots of support here.
I don't know if any of you remember but in my first post I mentioned that I very recently lost a friend to alcoholism. The day that we cleaned up her house (which was not a nice task) was my first day of being dry. I don't know what clicked that day and I really don't think it was her premature death but this is the first time I have 'got' it. I can't help but think its a little bit 'woo' and I am not a spiritual person.
Just wanted to share. Well whatever it is I am just happy not to be drinking.

gladistopped · 24/11/2015 22:25

dona Flowers and a hug for what you did for your friend. Sorry cant do tildas!

gladistopped · 24/11/2015 22:25

tildes [oops]

Original poster
CheesyNachos · 25/11/2015 11:25

Morning everyone. Welcome Bitter.:)

Looking forward to seeing your sober advent calendar Lucy!

OP posts:
Lucy2610 · 25/11/2015 18:15

I hope you like it Cheesy! :) I've teamed up with the brilliant peeps over at A Royal Hangover and it is an awesome quote about their sobriety along with each image to keep us feeling strong and like we're hanging with the cool kids Grin Wink

Brighit · 25/11/2015 21:31

Hope you're feeling a bit better now Cheesy. You too 3phase

Awesome Lucy, looking forward to reading your advent calendar.

Well done dona and so sorry to hear about your friend. I lost someone at the start of the year because of liver failure. She died about 2-3 weeks into this attempt and it really reaffirmed how pointless and poisonous alcohol is. Such a waste of a life. I'm not woo in the slightest and think when you die that's it but during the times I feel weak I imagine what she would say to me for contemplating it if she was somehow watching over me.

Hi and welcome Bitter, hope you're still going strong :)

wickedfairy · 26/11/2015 07:31

Marking place - am very interested in joining, although I may wait until the new year. Clean slate, nowhere near as many meets to sway me...

You are all inspiring!