How effing nice is *this*?

[GiraffeGotTheLastRoomInTheInn]

I am suffering quite badly from what the doctor today described as 'one of the worst cases of tonsillitis I have EVER seen'.

I feel like I am dying, I haven't eaten ANYTHING for four days and am struggling to swallow my own saliva, let alone drink anything.

And dp has....

wait for it.....

gone to stay with his parents 'so he doesn't catch it', only returning home to collect ironed shirts and (admittedly only once) ask if I could just make him some lunch.

My mum has been helping me out with dd this week, thank goodness, but she is going away tomorrow so i have got to cope with dd all by myself.

So he says to me on the phone tonight

'I'm going climbing straight from work tomorrow.Don't suppose you fancy it, do you? No? Oh well I'll speak to you over the weekend then and see if you're better.'

What f***ng world does he live in?

Do you know, I feel like telling him I am better and ready to give him a celebratory blow job, then when he comes rushing home, give him a big snog, making sure my tonsils come into contact with his....

And then leave him on his own for a fucking week in HIS hour of need.

yes thats true kh

I might show him this thread when he finally decides to return, like the prodigal lamb, expecting me to be pleased.

erm..i meant the prodigal son, obviously

Sadly he doesn't sound like a 'keeper'

ah maybe you are thinking of a sacrificial lamb - making an example of him maybe

I would help but doubt you are anywhere near where I am (NZ)

His arguments may just about wash if it wasn't for the fact that he has completely left you to it! Has he offered any support? Like picking up your prescription, getting you some food etc etc? It sounds like a crappy excuse to me. Each time dh has had tonsillitis I've kept my distance but been in the same house and taken on the lion's share of the work. He could easily just sleep elsewhere in the house and keep his distance the rest of the time.

It's taking selfishness to a new level!

P.S. If you're in the Edinburgh area I could help??

AND, the first night I was ill(before he retreated to his parents' house), he asked me what was for tea, and when I suggested that he heat something up from the freezer, he decided to ignore me and cook himself a chicken stir fry, using ALL the chicken from one planned meal, all the peppers and veg from another and noodles from another.

So half the meals on the plan were scuppered in one fell swoop.

I know that's petty to get annoyed about, but to my knowledge it was the first time he has ever cooked, and he also left noodles everywhere, didn't wash up (it's still there now!). the sink is blocked by noodles, noodles draped all over the sides.....

Kill him.

You're not selling him to us Giraffe....

right, I'm off to bed but I hope you get a good night's sleep and feel better tomorrow

hmc, unfortunately not.

a bit for my dd i think, she loves him and it will be v confusing for her if he moves out.

AND for me too, I love him but I cannot live like this.

kh/mrsj- we are in cheshire so not really close enough for you to nip round and do the school run!

And no help at all apart from a galss of water the other day/passsing me the paracetamol once- i had to set my alarm to ring the doc (have to ring at 8.30 am to get an appt same day)
I had to drive to the docs (nearly crashed the car)
and pick up my own prescription.

Sod.

I wish he was a sacrificial lamb.

Ummm - your dd loves him, you love him

Have you had this out with him? Just maybe there is hope if he realises the errors of his ways?

no, do you know what, it is only when i type all this stuff here that it becomes clear to me what a selfish git he is. I mean, don't get me wrong, he has some really good points and he can be very caring. I chose to be with him and I am not an imbecile, so he must be a fairly reasonable choice, but i am starting to think for the first time that maybe the good doesn't outweigh the bad.

Sorry it's late - just realised that you said that you had a big talk with him a couple of weeks back.

He's a man (sorry sexist) he may need it reiterating a few times before it sinks in...?

yeah, we had a BIG talk a couple of weeks ago. So this has been brewing for some time.

Oh poor you Giraffe. I understand as I get bad tonsilitis every year.

Am fluffing up your pillows and folding down the sheets for you.

Gargle disprins- I found that was good for the pain.

Has yours got great big white pus nodules on too?

I didnt think tonsilitis was infectious anyway. None of mine ever get it like me! DH is nearly as bad, have to rely on my dds to bring me water and food up. And if I am really neglected my Mum comes round and gets cross with him.

I am sure you will wake up feeling better tomorrow on the ab's.

NEVER NEVER nurse him when he is ill. Go shopping. Keep that thought in your head when he crawls back.

(((((hugs))))

Anyway - you need to try and get some sleep (probably quite hard when you are in pain) - it will aid recovery.

Try and go to bed!

I bloody will not nurse him when he is ill.

I was wide awake, just now, because i have been asleep nearly all day! But you're right, am going to try and go back to sleep now as i will have to get up in the morning.

I know you won't see this until the morning. But am also at the way you're being treated. See if you can get some Difflam Oral rinse on prescription from your GP it helps lessen the pain and would let you at least drink and swallow. Take care of yourself and make dp suffer big time for this.

I'm stunned. I can't imagine what i'd feel if my DP did that to me...how hurtful. Hope you get better soon. Try some nice ice cream

I hope you feel better soon. I suffered from tonsillitis loads when younger, often one bout straight after another, until I had them taken out because they were so bad, so I know how much you are suffering
Wait til you're really better to talk to DP, you wouldn't want to hurt your throat again shouting! He does sound like an arse, sorry.
But I didn't think you could catch tonsillitis? I never managed to pass it on to anybody

You are stone cold last in his pecking order. You are also waking up to how selfish he actually is as you are seeing the extent of his selfishness. Your daughter may well be accpeting of him but this is between you and your partner.

Also what is all this teaching your DD: that it is okay to leave someone very ill to fend for themselves?. You can just about look after yourself currently but are expected to look after your daughter as well.

He has put himself above you and has not to date even looked after your DD by being there.

His climbing quip would be the straw that broke the camels back.

agree with attila.

I'd change the locks.

It does sound like Quinsy. My mum once had it. According to NHS, it may need hopital treatment. nhs quinsy link

If his mother is such a frickin' saint for "looking after him", may I suggest you call her and say you may need to go to A&E as you may need an emergency tonsillectomy and ask her to help you since your partner has seen fit to go and stay with her.

And tonsillitis, whether bacterial or viral is only transferrable by airborne droplets. see here .

Tell your partner to get his fucking useless arse home with a surgical mask and some hand sanitiser.

I am so sorry for you.

hope you are feeling a little bit better this morning

you need to build up all your strength so you can give (D?)P a bll*cking when he comes back