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Original poster

1 month old too young for football?

284 replies

charlottetrip · 30/07/2015 09:26

I don't know if I've posted this in the right place, but any way.
My bf wants to take our 4 week old baby to football match on Saturday. I think this is far to young to be going. However when I expressed my feelings it was if I was being irrational and over worrying for not letting him go.
I'd just like to know other people's thoughts?

OP posts:

SurlyCue · 30/07/2015 21:57

We are talking about a four week old baby here, not an older child, and a woman who has just given birth expressing concerns

Yes i know, ive been following the thread from the start. My comments are already based on the information given in the OP. Im not sure why you think repeating these facts would alter my opinion, that is based on those same facts

Soft play v English Channel swimming?

One is reasonable the other isn't!

Who says one is reasonable? Who says it is any more reasonable than a football match? What some people on this thread are saying is that if one parent is worried then they get right of veto, so if a dad is worried about softplay then he gets right of veto if we follow that rule. No-one would think taking a newborn swimming in the english channel is reasonable. Plenty think its reasonable to take one to a football match.

Original poster

charlottetrip · 30/07/2015 22:24

I have come to a compromise and going to the football match with them.
I just feel like it's a long time to be away from my baby and in an environment I don't feel totally comfortable with.
At least if I am there I know he'll be okay, and not sitting at home worrying.
The thing that's annoyed me the most is that my bf doesn't understand my worries and just thinks I over worry about things.

OP posts:

Tangoandcreditcards · 30/07/2015 22:44

Good shout OP. I took DS to cricket at 6 weeks old and it was nice. By the time he was 5-6 months it was a bit hectic for him. You can always leave then if you aren't happy. 4 weeks post birth (until about 8 weeks) I'd still get little anxious moments and it was nice to have the control to just be able to go home in my own time to ground myself a bit.

SurlyCue · 30/07/2015 22:47

Good compromise OP. I hope you all have a lovely day out.

Santanna15 · 30/07/2015 22:48

Charlottetrip - you are not being unreasonable by not wanting your four week old baby to go to a football match. I think the idea is completely mad! Crowds, drunks, noise.... Never in a million years would I allow it for my baby. Stand firm on your motherly instincts.

Original poster

charlottetrip · 30/07/2015 22:52

It's not that I don't trust his dad on hie own with him it's just the environment he's taking him in.
We'd discussed it before he was born and it was never the plan to take him so young. It was always just to take him to meet his friends before the match and then go home. But because the plans of doing that haven't been able to happen, it's turned into taking him to the match instead.

OP posts:

Original poster

charlottetrip · 30/07/2015 22:54

But it only has to happen this once until he's older. Hopefully it'll be okay.
It will probably be me doing more whinging about being cold and bored than the baby haha

OP posts:

Jdee41 · 30/07/2015 22:59

OP - hope it's a good game, at least! Hope you all have a great day out.

Santanna15 · 30/07/2015 23:01

That's the thing though, you are his mother and primary carer at this vulnerable age. You have the main say of where your baby goes and if you are not comfortable with it, that is reason enough for him not to go. He should not pressurise you into it or make you feel stupid. I can't think of a worse environment for a baby actually.

redshoeblueshoe · 30/07/2015 23:15

I can - soft play is a fuckingnightmare
well OP I hope you all enjoy your trip out

IamaBluebird · 30/07/2015 23:53

Hope you all have a lovely day op and congratulations on your new baby. Just to let you know I took my baby to a football match at two months old. Lovely and snug cwtched in my coat.

mellicauli · 31/07/2015 00:52

Hope it all goes well. If you still feel uncomfortable about it, you can always ring up your health visitor and ask their advice.

firesidechat · 31/07/2015 06:19

It's very sad that you can't see it's selfish. It's a generational shift. Do what I want and if there's "no harm to the baby" doesn't matter ! What the hell!

Cheers it's not a generational shift at all. I am the previous generation and I don't see why this is such a terrible idea. The baby won't even know and will be with one of it's parents, who hopefully isn't a complete idiot.

Don't go trashing an entire generation just because it's something you wouldn't do.

munki · 31/07/2015 10:43

I took my 5 week old to loads of Olympic events. He fed, slept, fed, slept, fed, slept - no problems at all.

OhItsYouAgain · 31/07/2015 11:11

I love watching football on TV and was excited to go to my first match but hated it!! Everyone around me was drunk, shouting at the players and standing up leaning over me!!! I hated it and it's put me off ever going again. I wouldn't take a baby.

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 13:38

I wish somebody would tell me what a suitable, non selfish thing to do with a month old baby is.

Jo4040 · 31/07/2015 14:07

Well TBH...

It all depends whos playing....

seagreengirl · 31/07/2015 14:07

I wish somebody would tell me what a suitable, non selfish thing to do with a month old baby is.

How about something that both parents are happy with, all it takes is compromise and consideration. It's not hard.

Offred · 31/07/2015 14:10

Well, I can't see that many people would enjoy going to a football match where everyone was required to stay quiet, be sober, not celebrate their teams goals or complain about the other team getting a bad ref decision... That fact is that all that noise and emotion, for a 1 month old is just going to be scary noise and he will get nothing out of it. That's why it's selfish - because you subject him to an environment that will cause him stress just because you want to force your hobby on him/show him off.

Hissy · 31/07/2015 14:13

you going too is a brilliant idea! IF your DC doesnt like the environment, you can easily take him out. Chances are the game won't have a large gate if it's a pre-season.

I too want to know who you are going to see...

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 14:25

"That fact is that all that noise and emotion, for a 1 month old is just going to be scary noise and he will get nothing out of it. That's why it's selfish - because you subject him to an environment that will cause him stress just because you want to force your hobby on him/show him off."

I would be amazed if a 1 month old baby in a sling was stressed by a football match! 6 months maybe- but I month? But if he showed any sign of being unhappy then the could be taken out- obviously!

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 14:26

"I wish somebody would tell me what a suitable, non selfish thing to do with a month old baby is.

How about something that both parents are happy with, all it takes is compromise and consideration. It's not hard."

But people are saying that taking the baby to the football match is inherently selfish, however the mother feels about it. I just want to know what a non selfish activity would be.

CheersMedea · 31/07/2015 14:32

I just want to know what a non selfish activity would be.

The stupidity of some people is extraordinary. Do you not actually understand what the word selfish means?

The fact you are evening asking this illustrates the extent of the problem. It's become totally normal for parents to just do whatever they want irrespective of the best interests of the child.

Are you really unable to identify activities that prioritise the comfort, wellbeing and interests of a 4 week old baby as compared to slinging into a sack and buggering off down the football because YOU want to?

CheersMedea · 31/07/2015 14:33

YOU meant in the sense of plural you - "one in general".

RiverTam · 31/07/2015 14:37

'Slinging into a sack'? What the hell does that mean?

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