Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Flip

1 2 ··· 7 8 9 10 11 12

Original poster

1 month old too young for football?

284 replies

charlottetrip · 30/07/2015 09:26

I don't know if I've posted this in the right place, but any way.
My bf wants to take our 4 week old baby to football match on Saturday. I think this is far to young to be going. However when I expressed my feelings it was if I was being irrational and over worrying for not letting him go.
I'd just like to know other people's thoughts?

OP posts:

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 14:38

Well you have the opportunity to educate. How about giving a few examples of suitable outings for a month old baby? How do you feel about baby friendly cinema showings, for example? How about a trip to the pantomime with older siblings? An open air classical concert? Which of those is selfish?

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 14:40

I took one of mine to an open air performance of A Midsummer Night's Dream, for example- was that selfish? She slept the whole time, by the way.

seagreengirl · 31/07/2015 14:48

If you are talking about outings that are purely in the interests of a one month old baby then a nice turn round the block in a pram would probably be the thing that would give the baby most pleasure. Anything else is for the benefit of the parents and if there is a something that they both are happy with and is not a distressing environment for a very young baby then that would not be selfish.

I am afraid that I cannot make it any more clear than that, but as I suspect, you are deliberately goading and misunderstanding, there is nothing more to say.

Offred · 31/07/2015 15:54

The whole point about a 1 month old is that it isn't that easy to tell that they are stressed like with a 6 month old.

Redtowel · 31/07/2015 16:01

OP have you been to a football match? I was a regular at old Trafford for years. The noise was deafening, even for an adult. I cannot begin to imagine taking a one month old baby to a match.

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 16:01

Well, I could certainly tell that my sound asleep 4 week old wasn't stressed during my outdoor performances. Unless my selfish activities secretly stressed her.......

Offred · 31/07/2015 16:09

If you can't see the difference between watching an outdoor play and going to watch a football match you are either purposefully thick or just plain thick tbh.

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 16:22

The concert was Beethoven- amongst other stuff. Very loud indeed. Baby slept throughout. If she hadn't, I would have taken her home. As, presumably, would football match dad.

seagreengirl · 31/07/2015 16:29

BertrandRussell

Well then if you were happy, your partner was happy and the baby was happy, what's with all this passive aggressive "selfish" nonsense. What a pity that a topic can't be debated like adults.

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 16:41

It wasn't me that started with the "selfish" thing.

If my partner had said that he didn't want me to take our baby to a concert or a play I would have said that I was sorry he felt like that but I was still going to go. And I would be hurt and possibly even angry that he didn't trust me to care for our baby. Why should the father in this scenario feel any different?

SurlyCue · 31/07/2015 17:07

This thread has become ridiculous. All football matches equate to Old Trafford not the ones ive been to! Carrying a baby in a sling equates to "slinging into a sack" it seems that its ignorance driving these "concerns" and accusations of ignorance. Some people seem to have either selective memories of when their babies were small or just didnt have any life at all during that stage. How sad for them. Its made them all very pious.

Are you really unable to identify activities that prioritise the comfort, wellbeing and interests of a 4 week old baby

are you? You havent been able to identify any yet...

SurlyCue · 31/07/2015 17:08

accusations of selfishness

Offred · 31/07/2015 17:25

Since you really don't seem to be able to see the difference;

A play or a concert involves passive watching/listening to either speaking or music. If it was really very loud maybe some protection for the baby's ears might have been in order but the actual noise could not be expected to cause stress.

A football match involves active participation in supporting a team who are playing a competitive sport. The noise reflects times of heightened emotion and that is the reason the noise may well stress a baby.

Can you really not see the difference?

Offred · 31/07/2015 17:28

And this is not about not having a life. If this was a single parent who loves football I'd be thinking well if you must go then do. This is a dad who doesn't need to take the baby to enjoy the hobby - he just wants to for some reason.

Offred · 31/07/2015 17:31

It's not about wrapping babies in cotton wool, never letting them be stressed ever or having no life once a child is born. It's about someone specifically wanting to do something entirely unnecessary and stressful because they want to use the baby to show off.

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 17:58

I just don't think a 4 week old tucked into a sling cuddled up to his dad is going to be stressed by being at a football match. And I don't think there's anything wrong with showing a baby off.

Santanna15 · 31/07/2015 18:04

There is nothing wrong in showing off a baby, but not to the detriment of the baby. It is not being done for the baby, it's all about what the dad wants.

Offred · 31/07/2015 18:09

No, there's nothing inherently wrong with showing off your baby. If you think a newborn won't be stressed by a football match then you could have saved a lot of time and energy by just saying that in the first place rather than all this ridiculousness about Beethoven....

BertrandRussell · 31/07/2015 18:15

I have been saying it since the beginning of the thread!!!!!!!

Offred · 31/07/2015 18:18

Then why bother making such a massive deal of it?

Offred · 31/07/2015 18:19

And going on about things that are not football and nothing like football...

Offred · 31/07/2015 18:23

And actually reading your posts you have pretty much said everything BUT that tbh...

SurlyCue · 31/07/2015 18:36

Fuck this is insane! Its going round in circles.

Some people think its fine. Others dont. Those that dont are no more right than those who do. It is a matter of opinion. If you think its wrong then dont do it, but that doesnt make those that do (including OP who is now doing it) selfish.

MissBattleaxe · 31/07/2015 19:29

The baby is a boy. I knew it. This is about the father wanting father/son footy bonding time. I bet you anything he wouldn't bother if it was a girl. This is about the Dad romanticising the "That'sMyBoy" father/son football thing.

Santanna15 · 31/07/2015 20:05

The op did not want her baby to go but the dad has brushed aside her very legitimate concerns about her newborn's welfare. That is not on. Would any health professional seriously think this would be a good idea?

Flip

1 2 ··· 7 8 9 10 11 12