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Original poster

1 month old too young for football?

284 replies

charlottetrip · 30/07/2015 09:26

I don't know if I've posted this in the right place, but any way.
My bf wants to take our 4 week old baby to football match on Saturday. I think this is far to young to be going. However when I expressed my feelings it was if I was being irrational and over worrying for not letting him go.
I'd just like to know other people's thoughts?

OP posts:
Enoughalreadyyou · 30/07/2015 19:56

Far too young. Too much bustle and loudness. Poor thing.

SurlyCue · 30/07/2015 20:04

It isnt selfish.

Your opinion is not fact. Nor is mine. Both opinions. You state yours, i can state mine.

sonjadog · 30/07/2015 20:05

I wouldn't have thought taking the baby to the pub on a Saturday was a good way to avoid crowds of inebriated people...

pieceofpurplesky · 30/07/2015 20:05

Bertrand you clearly didn't read my post. I said to take baby to a pub if a big match. I also stayed the op was bu to say her DP couldn't take the baby. If it's a small local match no problem but a big match is a no no. Not weird at all. I often took 4 week old to the pub with me for tea etc

sonjadog · 30/07/2015 20:11

But... If it is a big match, all the pubs near the grounds are going to be packed after the game. If the OP meets her DP after he has been at the game, then they are going to be meeting in a crowded pub full of football fans drinking pints.

pieceofpurplesky · 30/07/2015 20:12

where did I say pub near ground?

SurlyCue · 30/07/2015 20:13

I dont see how the pub is any better than the football match. Confused

pieceofpurplesky · 30/07/2015 20:14

For the record I have had a season ticket at a premier league ground since I was 8 (now 45) so I do know about football grounds and surrounding pubs

pieceofpurplesky · 30/07/2015 20:16

Surly - a family pub as opposed to a screaming horde of football fans? With baby change facilities and places to sit comfortably without being knocked or jostled. Again if a small match no problem.

sonjadog · 30/07/2015 20:17

You think the DP's friends are going to travel away from the ground a good distance to a quiet pub just for the chance to meet their friend's 4 week old baby when they could be hanging out and enjoying the atmosphere in a pub filled with chat about the game? I guess you know a different sort of people than I do.

BertrandRussell · 30/07/2015 20:18

"It's very sad that you can't see it's selfish. It's a generational shift"

I am probably old enough to be your mother.

Explain to me why it's selfish to tuck a tiny baby into a sling and take him with you to something you want to do. The baby won't know where he is except safe and warm and cuddled up to his dad.

It might be selfish when he's older, and more aware and likely to be frightened by noise and crowds, I agree. But at 4 weeks, all a baby needs is warmth and cuddles and milk. He really doesn't care where he is when he gets these thing.

When mine were tiny I watched whatever I wanted to on TV while I breastfed. As soon as they became more aware of the outside world I didn't. I stopped watching Eastenders, for example because I didn't want hthem to hear the angry shouting voices. But at 4 weeks? No problem.

pieceofpurplesky · 30/07/2015 20:23

I guess Sonia it depends what type of friends the ops do has, not mine or yours. Lots of my friends drive to the match as no longer live locally - quite often all going back to one area later to drink a few and talk about the match. Doesn't have to always be wild you know. Also depends on age.

sonjadog · 30/07/2015 20:25

True. Tbh, this whole thread is just speculation without more information from the OP.

seagreengirl · 30/07/2015 20:26

Yes it is selfish, it would worry the mother, for another thing. The OP's DP would willingly worry the mother of his tiny baby for a whim. There are other places for his friends to see the baby, men can happily exist away from football grounds and pubs you know.

imwithspud · 30/07/2015 20:31

I really don't see how it's any different to taking them to a picnic or a coffee morning with friends

What kind of picnics and coffee mornings do you go to? Confused

In all seriousness it depends on the kind of match. If it's a big game involving Premier/Championship level teams where the attendance is likely to be in the 10's of thousands then no I wouldn't be happy with it - to crowded and too much noise. I wouldn't feel comfortable in that environment with my 9 week old.

If it's a smaller team where the attendance is likely to be a bit more modest then yeah I would probably feel a bit more comfortable with it.

SurlyCue · 30/07/2015 20:54

a family pub as opposed to a screaming horde of football fans?

Is that where the mates are going to be after the match? Doubt it.

Yes it is selfish, it would worry the mother, for another thing.

so its just as selfish for the mother to take the child anywhere at all if it worries the father, yes? Thats what we're saying here isnt it. That if one parent will worry they get the say over whether it happens and it automatically makes doing it selfish.

seagreengirl · 30/07/2015 21:00

That if one parent will worry they get the say over whether it happens and it automatically makes doing it selfish

When the baby is this young yes, of course. If my DH had expressed concern over something that I was planning with our newborn, of course I would reconsider. Wouldn't anyone in a loving relationship? The OP doesn't imply that she is stopping him taking the baby out, but she is worried about the football.

ButterDish · 30/07/2015 21:06

DH, who works for a PL club, has just noted that there's no PL-wide policy on minimum age, but that his club doesn't allow under-twos.

Charlie97 · 30/07/2015 21:11

How many of you go to picnics or coffee mornings with police being present???

If it's a premiership match there are police present to deal with crowds! Every single premiership match has that!

So slightly different to soft play, picnics etc!!

SurlyCue · 30/07/2015 21:21

If my DH had expressed concern over something that I was planning with our newborn, of course I would reconsider.

Really?? So if your DH didnt want you driving your baby anywhere you would reconsider? If he decided softplay (where baby would be nowhere near the apparatus or other kids) was too risky (germs) you would reconsider? Personally i'd be angry that my DH thought me such an incapable idiot and wonder why they thought it a good idea to conceive a child with someone so incapable of judging for them-self what was ok for them to do with their own child.

Question for those saying a worried parent gets veto- does this still stand if you are separated from child's parent? You would reconsider going to softplay or driving with your child if your ex objected out of "worry"?

Charlie97 · 30/07/2015 21:27

Surlycue, if OH said they were taking a four week old baby to swim in the English Channel as he loved cross channel swimming, would you say that was fine? Everyone has their own limit of what is acceptable, so therefore

Soft play v English Channel swimming?

One is reasonable the other isn't!

BertrandRussell · 30/07/2015 21:34

"Surlycue, if OH said they were taking a four week old baby to swim in the English Channel as he loved cross channel swimming, would you say that was fine?"

Nope. Because the baby would most definitely notice that he was in the Channel. He won't even notice that he's at a football match!

seagreengirl · 30/07/2015 21:40

SurlyCue

We are talking about a four week old baby here, not an older child, and a woman who has just given birth expressing concerns. But of course on Mumsnet new mothers always have to suck everything up don't they, everyone deserves an equal say. Well no actually, new mothers have more say. If anyone had tried to take my newborn to a football match I'd have flatly refused, call me controlling if you like.

Charlie97 · 30/07/2015 21:40

But he will If he is crushed and squashed and his sleep disturbed by people jumping up and down screaming all around him!

Charlie97 · 30/07/2015 21:42

And Bertrand why do they have police at all premiership football matches? ...... To control the crowds! It's crowded and the crowds need controlling!!!