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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Support for Spook 2

502 replies

Janstar · 09/05/2004 17:14

Here it is.

OP posts:
spook · 05/07/2004 21:23

So what's new Clayhead. I really thought I was making some progress this week.Still living in this pathetic little dreamworld that its going to come crashing down on him what he's done and come home to us. I am living on Planet Stupid.I just miss him and my marraige.

Clayhead · 05/07/2004 21:25

Spook, you're not stupid, just grieving, which is horrible and painful and takes time. You're not pathetic, you're strong and getting stronger all the time.

spook · 05/07/2004 21:27

I know I know Clayhead.I'm in that horrible anxious desperate frame of mind that I get in when things are really bad where I just want to scream and stamp my feet. Can't describe it. It just all feels so bloody unfair.I am SO angry. My fingers are twitching towards my phone to text her-and I am well aware that is a very bad move.

Original poster
Janstar · 05/07/2004 21:44

Stay on mn Spook. That'll give you something to do with your fingers and some sympathetic people to have a rant to until you feel better. And Clayhead is right. Your grief is a measure of your strength of character as it's proportional to the depth of your love and commitment. It should make your h ashamed.

OP posts:
spook · 05/07/2004 21:48

But he hasn't even replied to my text!! You think the tw*t would have a shred of humility and realise that leaving those pictures out was totally out of order.The boys do NOT need to see that. The man is an absolute monster.WHY am I kidding myself that my soulmate and love of my life might make an reappearance some time soon???

Blu · 05/07/2004 21:49

Errrr yuk! HOW PATHETIC! No Spook, it isn't you, it's pathetic and vain and childish of him, but I'm afraid is typical of his whole behaviour. He should have been more thoughtful - to you.
Keep on MN and don't text her. Silence is v strong, and v dignified.

beetroot · 05/07/2004 21:51

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Message withdrawn

Blu · 05/07/2004 21:51

posts crossed.
He's all puffed up and self-important in his candy-floss world - it wouldn't occur to him to be sensitive about piccies. Even if a sensitive father who knows his own kids would instantly know that they would home in on them. But he's only seeing ANYTHING from his point of view, isn't he.

Blu · 05/07/2004 21:53

It doesn't matter if he doesn't text you back about it. He isn't going to apologise, he will just blame you for being hysterical. Not because you are, but because he can't bear to be put in the wrong. I can just imagine his cheesy sub-Athene style pics. hope he cringes one day!

spook · 05/07/2004 21:55

I won't girls.I promise.Coz I know you'll be proud of me. I'm going out again tonight-drown my sorrows (again) My social life is like buses...last night,tonight,tomorrow,Saturday,Monday.Good grief.Then on Tuesday I die.

Blu · 05/07/2004 22:00

yes we WILL be very proud of you. We are proud of you anyway. Glad you're going out - what are you doing, cocktails with girlfriends?

spook · 05/07/2004 22:03

Exactly that! Unfortunately last night I threw my guts up in a restaurant!Can't take it anymore girls.Think my minging hangover is part of my general miserable demeanour today!

Blu · 05/07/2004 22:06

Oooh, have 'healthy' cocktails, you know ones which have actual fruit or juice in them, not just 100% martinis! I'm sure you could get your 5 portions a day like that!
Where are the good cocktail bars in newcastle now? I haven't been for years - I was at Uni there, and loved it. Would love to come up soon and see the new bridge, and Baltic. But i realise that's GATESHEAD!!

spook · 05/07/2004 22:11

It sure is.It's also where my twat of a husband lives.Some swanky apartment in the Baltic! There's loads of nice places now. I'm going to a great bar tonight called Popolo and the bar bit of the Tyneside Cinema does a fab Sea Breeze!
Must admit-my get up and go has got up and gone though.Babysitter will be here in 10 mins and I've not even started to getr eady yet. Too busy cuddling my soft boys and writing this!

spook · 05/07/2004 22:12

Oh-I read a wonderful quote in a book I'm reading today..."the memories of happiness are almost as painful as the absence of it" Thought that was fab.

spook · 05/07/2004 22:13

Blu-when were you at uni here???So was I!

Blu · 05/07/2004 22:13

Concentrate on the cuddling, and have a good night out. Feel all nostalgic now - i used to go to the Tyneside cinema, but it was a small scruffy little place then.

Blu · 05/07/2004 22:15

Tha is a brilliant quote.

I am OLD, certainly the oldest owner of a toddler on MN, and was at Uni 1976-9, reading English lit. Lived in Jemond - Lily Crescent - what a life. Sunny days at Tynemouth, sledging in Jesmond Dene, legless in the Bigg Market....

spook · 05/07/2004 22:16

Oh-you were 10 years ahead of me honey. You're right though.Halcyon days...

beetroot · 05/07/2004 22:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Blu · 05/07/2004 22:22

Alright alright Beety, no need to THAT far in order to distract her from texting evil barbie bitch athena-poster reject!

Blu · 05/07/2004 22:23

And Spook - get out there and have a nourishing Sea Breeze!

spook · 06/07/2004 14:47

Hi everyone.Yet again nursing hangover from hell. I'm getting used to living my life in a fug. I'm off to pick the boys up-no more adult conversation for 3 months! Gulp. (no more alarm clocks or uniforms or homework..Hurray!!)
Thanks for all being there last night too. Had not surprisingly had NO response from him about the photos. Still residing on Planet Twat.
Lots of love all of you XXXXXXX

Blu · 06/07/2004 15:06

There's always MN for the adult conversation (just about...)

Beccarollover · 06/07/2004 15:06

I used to live right near Lily Cnt in Jesmond - oh, and whispers I wasn't even born until '80 hehehehe

Hope you had a good night spook mate Im in the process of packing my job in so I'll be available for fun days out with the kids [winks] for the summer