Getting married in two days and feel like running away

[sunshineandspiders]

That's it really. I'm sick with worry that I'm doing the wrong thing. Guests are travelling tomorrow from all over the UK and I feel like the axe is coming down on my head. I'm so embarrassed and feel I'm going ahead with it just so not to look stupid.

My partner and I have been arguing for weeks about his negative sarcastic behaviour and more recently about his nasty arrogant attitude towards my daughter. He's like an addict who can't see how his behaviour is so destructive. Even after two days of intense discussion and arguments, the first words out of his mouth when I came in earlier were negative.

It's dragging me down and making me depressed. If I had more time I'd suggest some space apart to try and work out what the issue is. But I feel I don't.

I hate him at the moment and can't pull myself out of it.

Oh I had to post. This was me. How I wished I'd called it off. No one will blame you as you so clearly have your doubts. Call it off, then take yourself and your daughter away for a few days to give yourself some head space.
Be true to yourself. Big hugs xxxx

Please call it off.

It may be awkward and a little embarrasing to do so, but nowhere near as difficult as getting away from a man like this years down the line and rebuilding your DD's self esteem.

Call if off.

You should not marry a man you describe in the terms of your OP. You can call it off 2 minutes before it happens if necessary. All it will do is cause a stir for a few minutes before people go back to their own lives. Don't marry someone who is destructive, mean, arrogant and makes you depressed.

Skip the divorce: don't get married in the first place. Worked for me.
The train has not left the station...You are not married yet. Call it off...But you must speak up because no one will be able to read your mind.
You do not need to give a reason; just inform people the event is cancelled.

Let us know if you go through with it today??

Thinking of you!

Whatever decision you made, I hope you'll find happiness. MN is great in what seems like a hopeless situation, it's always here if you need it.

This is so depressing if the OP doea go through with it. I left my XP a few weeks bwforw the wedding. Yes it was weeks, not 2 days, but we'd already paid for/committed to pay for almost everything. Am married to a lovely man now.

OP - if you're reading. Go with your gut instinct. Not what you think people want you to do.

I was ditched about a month before. At the time it was devastating but it was the best thing. It would have been far more hideous after. Please don't go through with it. He doesn't sound like a nice person.

3m before here, and I agree, it took a while but a year later I was glad, and continued to be gladder every year. (I'm still in touch with one of my would-be inlaws, she's brilliant, but her tales make my hair stand on end! Lucky escape)

Hope you are ok OP. Hoping you have called it off. If not, do find support here or in real life. No one will judge you.

thinking of you again today OP
we are here for you :)

How are you, sunshine? Hope you are happy with your decision, either way also I really want to know what happened

Oh gosh I do hope you called it off. I didn't have the guts and took 18 months to pluck the courage to divorce. 18 miserable miserable months...X

You got married didn't you op.

its ok. How are things now ?
Are you ok?

I hope she called it off. Four days before my wedding I nearly called it off but the only reason I didn't was embarrassment. I felt that people would be talking about me, I would have been ashamed and also everyone had gone to so much trouble. I went through hell for the next 3.5 years til we split and then divorced 1.5 years after that. I wish so much I had listened to my gut and had a few weeks of embarrassment compared to years of misery.