Do you have a fetish?

[NameChangeSoStrange]

NC'd as both mother and a close female friend know my MN name and quite frankly don't fancy them reading this (or knowing it is me when they read this at any rate).

I was wondering if any MNetters have any fetishes?

If you don't want to say what it is that's fine just curious how many people have a specific niche - is it as common as a phobia (the opposite presumably) or is it a little more rare?

I find them fascinating because I'm curious if there is normally a specific cause for a fetish and would be interested to see what posters post on here.

I would say my fetishes or more aptly for myself, turn on's is a little bit of dominance (the other person) but not to the extent of being abusive/nasty. I also like the thought of more than one man at a time (though in reality I'd hate this, so no idea why my mind likes it).

I know it's a very nosy question but as we are all anonymous I thought I'd see what others say.

MNHQ feel free to delete away if a fair few are offended.
Feel free not to answer if you really don't feel comfortable nobody will make you.

Thanks for engaging if you do answer :)

~NiC~

My XH had a plastic / PVC fetish, so yes, it did get in the way of normal sex.

I used to feel like I didn't exist. He was having sex with the clothes that I was wearing. I could have been anyone , he wouldn't have cared.
When I met him I was 18 and I thought it was all really cool. I was very naive and stupid really. All quite sad really.

It got worse when he started cross dressing.

I used to yearn for vanilla sex.

No, I'm not making it up.

" I could have been anyone , he wouldn't have cared."

He might have cared if it turned out it was the Creme Egg Guy he'd been getting jiggy with.

That sounds like the Gullible World Records to me. "Yeah, the last one only managed 8, I bet you could beat that."

paxtecum Your ex sounds like a prize bellend. Sadly, you get as many knobbers in bdsm as you get anywhere.

GF he wasn't into BDSM, but we did go to a few cross dressing weekends, which were interesting.

He was a complete prize bell end, though.

I do wish MN had been around many years ago.

Re cream eggs: the space up a bum is rather endless. I do know someone who lost a large vibrator up there and because it was on vibrate ( with new batteries of course) it worked it's way up and up. He ended up in A &E. They eventually removed it late the next afternoon.

All very embarrassing for him.

"the space up a bum is rather endless. I do know someone who lost a large vibrator up there and because it was on vibrate ( with new batteries of course) it worked it's way up and up. "

Similar to how the Channel Tunnel was built.

My XH had a plastic / PVC fetish, so yes, it did get in the way of normal sex

Why would it?

I like PVC but it doesn't get in the way, it's an addition to the repertoire.

The aim of sex for us is to please the other, as well as being pleased, but it's got to be a '2 ticks in the box' activity.

There are things both of us would like to try that the other doesn't, or things we both share that one might be in the mood for when the other isn't. That's fine and fully understood and respected.

Having a kink shouldn't be all consuming or disrespectful of your partner. If a person with a kink is disrespectful, that's because of who they are, not what their kink is.

I hope you don't get the conditioner mixed up.......

ooops,looks like im about 10 pages too late with my comment!

Haha LEM- was that someone's OH's hair washing bj penchant?

I had a friend who dated someone who liked to be her shower. As in, he stood there naked in the bath, holding the shower head in the air, eyes closed, massive hard on, whilst she just took a shower, without touching him.

Paxtecum your ex sounds like a selfish arse, I'm so sorry. Congrats on him being your ex now though

GF and JoysMum I'm glad you say that it's more a case of adding to the repertoire. Good sex (and I guess healthy relationships in general) are about open honest communication and mutual respect at the heart of everything really aren't they, and I guess as long as that is there then the addition of any kink should simply be that, an addition, I guess.

I'm really enjoying re-exploring the wilder, darker side with a new partner in a much maturer, more respectful way than with anyone else before- it's all about each other's pleasure first rather than our own, if that makes sense.

I know I'm late to this thread....but pegging?? Who knew?!

Joysmum

The poster who felt her XH's fetish for plastic/PVC got in the way described it as feeling like her XH was making love to the coat, not to her, IIRC. That's not good, if the fetish becomes more important than the person you're with.

FryOneFatManic

I think my last paragraph covered my thoughts on that.

Sex is an act I believe that should give equal satisfaction to those participating. There's no excuse for her shit partner but he's shit because of who he is, not because of his kink. I'd hoped I'd made that clear.

I just read an article (don't you just love a lazy Sunday morning, trawling the Internet inspired by MN threads...!) saying the difference between 'kink' and 'fetish' is that kink enhances the intimacy with a partner, whereas fetish replaces it. That's just semantics clearly, but there is a point there- and perhaps a line between healthy and unhealthy relationship? Perhaps fetishes are best practiced with partners that you are not also emotionally intimate with, as they are an end unto themselves? Just a thought

But some people have a fetish for being objectified, like the human shower man. It's more that you need to pick a partner with the same fetishes and kinks.

I guess. And the human shower man's fetish did get in the way of the intimacy for my friend and was a major reason why she stopped seeing him- and she's far from being a prude.

I hope one day he finds a nice woman whose fetish is having a shower

test

I have a fetish that is actually a bit of a menace in my life, because it is almost exclusively the only way I can get properly turned on (not just enthusiastically faking).

It's displays of fear, specifically by men, and particularly if it is fear of something alive/conscious and more powerful than them. Sci-fi and vampire shows are perfect for this. I have USB sticks of film/tv clips from these sorts of shows which I can orgasm to just by watching on repeat (not even anything physical needed). I don't want them to be physically hurt or killed, just scared.

However, I find it a very sinister part of my personality, and am both ashamed of it, as well as confused as to what it is all about. I would rather get rid of it completely, but have never been able to. Destroyed many usb sticks and sworn 'abstinence', only to get triggered by a random clip on tv, and end up accumulating another collection.

"It's displays of fear, specifically by men"

Strangely enough, yes! Many a cartoon character in collections gone by (Rabbit, Sebastian the crab, Lumiere from Beauty/Beast, Woody, many more).

Abyss- is it ok if I ask how it started? Did you ever enjoy standard sex before? Do you imagine yourself as the being inspiring fear?

If it is such a problem for you though, then maybe psychosexual counselling could help.

I don't mind, I've tried for a long time to try and make some sense of it myself. Have come up with many answers, but none of them really stick. What I really want is to conquer it. I don't feel good about it, and really am far too embarrassed to go to counselling for it.

I've never known normal feelings around sex. Was abused growing up, along with violence, and was usually the one feeling fear. Maybe it's a straight forward revenge fantasy, I've sometimes wondered, but just doesn't quite fit somehow.

In any scenario, I'm detached. I'm not there, I'm just watching. In fact, I think a big part of it is feeling perfectly invisible/untouchable myself.

TheAbyssStares A lot of people who've survived abuse of all kinds find that if they act it out sexually, but where they're in control, it's oddly cathartic. I've know many rape survivors who do rape play because it lets them run through the scenario but in a controlled way. I was abused by my ex husband and I like inflicting emotional pain on men who enjoy it. And I am more contented than I've ever been in a relationship which allows me to be childlike as I was never parented adequately.

When I first started to be interested in ageplay it took me a long time to even allow myself to think it, and even longer to say it out loud.

Shame around sex is very common in our culture, even for nudity and "normal" sex, so not having an environment where you can talk about these things is very isolating. I'm a member of a kink community and it's the one place I can truly relax and be completely open.

In addition to being a pervert I am also a professional in the caring field. Feel free to pm me.

I don't mind a foray with a toy-boy or two.. dont judge me until you've tried it, message me if you want some recommendations.

do you have a store cupboard full of 'em ?

Fetish for Furries (don't ask)