It begs the question why are you choosing to post here moaning about people posting, and not posting on the threads that don't attract that much attention?
That's easy DeliciousMonster it's because I post on the threads I have experience of, especially if I'm not in the majority with my experiences. I have experience of what this thread relates to, I'm not in the majority so I'm posting here.
Twinklestein As far as my own previous thread goes, thank you so much as you've summarised that thread for me perfectly. 
Here's the update. I didn't bother wasting my time putting it on that thread for the reasons you've summarised. 
The advice I was given wasn't right for us despite me repeatedly posting saying so and trying to explain why. People read into it what they wanted to.
He certainly hadn't compromised at that point. He thought he could work ridiculous hours and do enough to tide us over at home. Not possible.
We still needed to go through that period of transition and adjustment. This was something I knew only time could fix hence the rant as time and change can't be rushed and I can be impatient.
I am not pushing myself too much as I am only studying the equivilent of full time hours plus commute. I have school hols off to be with DD if he doesn't have time off. This is not unreasonable. This is no more than if I were at uni full time so how could that be unreasonable?
Getting DH to see he was doing far more than other managers at his level because he didn't have home responsibilies as they do certainly wasn't unreasonable of me. I just needed him to see it and then have time to implement changes. I didn't want to dictate as things go better when the other can see what is fair and change because of it. It has now. 
The suggestions made to allow me to continue to do the majority of all things at home (as a cleaner isn't what either of us want) was hardly a push for women's rights and feminism so I ignored these as not relevant.
Having a cleaner is not right for us yet many didn't accept this as not right for either of us and posters were like a dog with a bone. It makes me smile you've bought it up again! I can assure you, neither of us want a cleaner still so that was ignored too!
We all have our lists of jobs, he has all the jobs that can be done when he has time and can be left for a week or two without much impact. Myself and my daughter do all the jobs that can't really be left and ought to be done consistently each day/week.
I did use an ironing service once after being ill which was great as he wont iron. Now DD will do this (but not his work shirts boo hiss as they take so long) for extra pocket money if needed to. That was something I'd never considered and helps.
He discussed things with his peers after me pointing out the continuing Facebook digs from them about the amount of time he worked. He's gradually trimmed back the hours, trained his department to be more self sufficient and is learning to trust them in that and not to micro manage. These things are a work in progress but so much better.
He now also works from home when he can to save on the commute and his phone is switched off after 8pm to let the out of hours team deal with. These are all things the others at his level do. He's worked away a number of times but that is part of his job, can't be changed and has always been the case.
Everything is good, we now have equal responsibility for things at home (and why shouldn't we!) but flexibility so that if he has a long week, or I have exams, we compensate for it.
Things have panned out per my ranty OP when I was impatient to be where we are now. Nobody would know that unless interested enough to remember that thread and then piece together what I've written since on other peoples threads.