depressed about sex life after talking to friends

[daffodiljar]

We were having a conversation about Valentines day and they ended up sharing details of their sex life which quite frankly is much more adventurous than mine. I was quite happy with how things are with me and DH but now I feel quite depressed. I think I would be mortified presenting DH with a cock ring etc. Am I a prude?

Well, you're not having sex with your friends, are you?
If you and your DH are happy the way you are, then who would benefit from you capitulating to some imagined cultural pressure?

Don't worry about what your friends say they do. Good for them if they're happy, and good for you as well.

Don't be depressed - be more adventurous! There's nothing exotic or unusual about a cock ring. Or a paddle. Or a prostate massager. Doesn't everyone spice up their sex life these days? My wife and I probably spend more at lovehoney than we do at Tesco!

Now I'm even more depressed! Is everyone else really spicing things up? Feeling very much like I'm behind the times!

It's a strange phenomenon but those couples who are most 'out there' with broadcasting to others how very happily married they are with such great sex lives.....often seem to end up divorcing. Perhaps they are trying to convince themselves

You are not behind the times.

Good quality 'vanilla' sex is going to hands down beat spiced up sex if that is shit.

Some are into toys, some harder stuff and some nothing.

There is no right or wrong as long as it is consensual and both partners enjoy.

There is no need for toys if you and your DH are happy with what you do.

Isn't that really kind of KOH to try and make you feel better by listing the sex toys he uses ?

yuk

op, take everything people tell you and discard 50% of it because they lie

If you and your H are happy with your sex life don't let anybody make you feel inferior

not everybody thinks they should be reenacting 50 SOG imbetween emptying the dishwasher and putting the kids to bed

I feel like I'm typing in invisible font today.

Thing is you have time for all the extras. I have been with husband for 25+ years and its only recently we have moved on from the vanilla and onto other things. You don't have to get it all out at once so to speak and have time to explore different things.

Why, Gilbert ?

Getting ignored left right and centre, AF. People seem to react only to the most provocative posters at the moment, have you noticed?

That is a good point, l8

my sex life is much better these days as the kids need less attention and my hormones are having a last hurrah before menopause

But everyone is just replying with their own opinion, Gilbert

there is no need to address yours, especially as it is in keeping with the majority of the thread and you didn't ask any questions

Well I don't feel unadventurous and we don't have a 'paddle', a prostate massager or a cock ring. I have a rabbit but that is it. We have a great time in bed, I wouldn't describe it as 'vanilla' and it suits us. If your sex life suits you, just ignore anyone else.

Well I think you've made pretty sensible points, Gilbert.

Why do people feel the need to regale others with details of their sex lives? It's so tacky.

To be honest I think its a private thing anyway and people who tell everyone every intimate detail are probably (definitely) over-exaggerating anyway. If you are both happy - who is to judge.

I like to think I'm pretty open minded and have a reasonably spicy sex life.

But I've just done a face at "prostate massager"

OP if you are both happy, then you are doing 1000% better than most I'd say. Relax. It's all fine

gilbert I think you need to stop expecting everyone to gather around you nodding tbh

If you are yapping about your sex life to all and sundry I will bet it's not so hot really

and yes, Gilbert, I totally agree with what you said

Agree with BitoutofPractice's advice to Gilbert

But on the upside, we are all very aware of what you have posted now Gilbert - in fact I've re-read your post several times out of guilt

Oh bore off kingofhearts

daffodil I second/third/fourth what others have said - if your husband and you are both happy then who else cares what you do in the bedroom? Don't feel insecure.

I have been SO vanilla recently due to babies and pregnancy but we're both happy and things may or may not pick up again in the future. No big deal.

Gilbert Blythe and prostate massagers in one thread eh? The former is sexy but don't like the sound of the latter, sounds medicinal and bladderish. Whatever would Anne say?

It's very easy OP for women to make out they're having sex 100 times a week, but you 're not in the bed room with them.

I had a friend who used to insist on giving me chapter and verse on her sex life and asking me about mine which I refuse to talk about. I'm not a prude far bloody from it! But it's between me and d.Sex made my dd and my angel. It's not something to brag about. People have been doing it since the beginning of time. It's no big acheivment.
In the end I turned around and said to my friend. I'm not interested, and you sound like you don't get any when you talk like that.

Sex, what's that?
Solitaire's the only game in our house.
Each to their own.

Who says they're telling the truth? And who cares anyway as long as you and your DH are happy - then again, if you're posting a thread on here maybe you're not happy? If you aren't, talk to him! I can't get how people can sleep with someone but not talk to them about how they feel or what they want.

I tried to find his prostate and couldn't - like a needle in a haystack and I even watched Colby Keller's video