I agree, dippin and gotta that kids make things hard and you do need child-free time to yourself as well (plus time to get stuff done that is easier to do child-free). My DS is only 2 which sort of makes it easier. He never gets up or comes downstairs in the evenings so (as long as I trust the guy, have met a few times and know plenty about him - where he lives, works etc), I'm happy to watch a film or something after DS has gone to sleep. I have introduced a previous boyfriend to DS - DS just saw him as one of my friends like my other friends some of whom he knows well and some less well so it wasn't really an issue and didn't spend enough time with him to get really attached, just the odd day out. I guess it just depends on the circumstances.
I got a text from the man I'm seeing, this afternoon :). He isn't working this week due to big family issue and said he felt numb, it sounds really hard. I just said I hope it goes as well as poss tomorrow and that I'm here if he wants to talk or needs anything etc. He said thank you etc. I think it's all fine, it is just hard as I don't know quite what he wants/needs (as I don't know him well enough) - trying to be understanding/supportive and not too needy/clingy. For myself, I just need to work out how to step away a little emotionally in the short term to keep myself on more of an even keel. Today, this has mostly been achieved through internet shopping! I have work tomorrow so I hope that helps.
gotta I agree, effort to communicate is important in early stages.
In terms of phone calls before first dates, I generally find them a good idea if the man suggests as it means he's happy to be relatively chatty/proactive. For me personally, I wouldn't call a man who didn't initiate one - not for any male/female reasons but just because I'm slightly on the shy side so wouldn't want to be stuck with a one-sided conversation. All the pre-date phone conversations I've had have been really easy and nice though. I also did a skype before a date once! They skype was fine but he ended up being a weirdo :/.