The Dating Thread 84.

[MadeMan]

Well, fancy seeing you here.

Thanks doc! Yes I agree with a different activity, the zoo! Haha

Thanks doc people are strange but have learnt through OLD not to take it personally and get upset, just move on.

Blah - definitely see him again. I know exactly what you mean, but I think the first date is the most awkward by far. See how you feel after another date.

Blossom It's happened to me countless times. It always feels pretty pants but I learnt to move on quickly.

Blah yes - it will get easier when you both get over initial shyness & get to know each other a bit....then you have to decide if you want to keep seeing him...if it isn't any less awkward then don't continue!

No conversation was fine.. It's the new person thing that freaks me out. Also I feel pressure from myself to do things that people should do on a date. E.g. We didn't kiss, cos I just felt too weird about it hopefully be easier next time. He's still texting a lot.

Blah First dates can feel like your going to an interview. I like meeting new people more when its a planned date rather than a room full of strangers. You don't need to kiss a stranger if your not comfortable with it. I have had dates with nervous people and I find it sweet and just try to make them feel comfortable and ask questions.
If he's still texting then that's a good sign, sometimes I have had a good date but no contact after date, he likes you :)
Rioux I'm not up to speed on dating or MN.
Seeing MT Tomorrow for coffee, watched American Psycho last night to see if MT might be a psycho :)
He did give me a card and pressie but I don't want to read into it, I know it will be seen as creepy by some women. I think its thoughtful.

My date delayed he busy I'm busy , he did ask me over for a butty on Xmas day but I'll be doing the tea lol

Might suggest boxing day cupa , we seem relaxed with each other

Hi fellow daters...

well I'm probably breaking all the rules of fight club sorry dating thread I mean the rules that were posted a few days ago!

Not intentionally - I've had a few messages which have replied to but no replies back so want a back up person...

but I saw Mr Sexy Blue Eyes (best name for him) on Sunday for a coffee date and OMG, it was amazing.

We went for coffee, then to see a sort of independent film (which threw up a tricky topic for me), then had pizza afterwards... and had a lovely walk round Covent Garden Piazza area and then to my bus stop.

And I am one smitten kitten. Drag me back down to earth sometime please.

He wants to see me again was talking about taking me to see Book of Mormon and he's totally the opposite of Kent Lad and the other twat I was dating the other month with the kid.

Gotta - trust your instincts (not read whole thread) re Major Tom. I know some well meaning women and men here are giving advice against him but its a lot different IRL sometimes...

I had one guy I dated years ago described as a Narc but I really think he wasn't, I think he had problems but wasn't a Narc.

Can you believe I've only just got your David Bowie Major Tom reference!

Blossom - Mr Builder's loss (just catching up here) glad Mr Football has got the message and Mr Lotus sounds a real contender... which is good.

jesy update on your date? sounds promising... even if delayed.

Christmas is so hard to arrange dates or around it... I only managed this one as it was the one day I had free (and night).

Rioux hardly been up to anything bar texting but my gawd he's sexy.... Puts Kent lad and his self proclaimed sexiness to shame.

Super Your date sounds promising, its good to be smitten, better Than not being sure if you like someone.
Love Bowie :)

Just going to see how things progress with MT, we have sexual chemistry and so far so good in that area.

These threads move so fast -I posted a while ago but it's moved on to two new threads since then!

I'm still doing occasional dating and wanted some opinion on doing the deed - especially after reading through the discussion at the beginning of this thread.

I DTD with someone at the weekend after three dates and it was DIRE. The worst I've ever experienced, but he's such a lovely man that I want to let him down gently. How to do this - any advice on not alerting him to the fact it was crap for me even though he enjoyed it?

On the plus side. I've realised I need to DTD reasonably soon. I don't want to invest my limited time and energy on chatting and dating someone if the chemistry isn't there after all. I never would have imagined I'd hold this view when I was a married woman - how times change!

"I DTD with someone at the weekend after three dates and it was DIRE."

If he seems a decent man, could you maybe try again to see if it's better the second time?

I don't think I can try again - the thought is making me cringe (it really was bad). He is a decent man but I'm not invested enough to make it work.

How can note him down gently? It's probably that we weren't compatible and another woman would like it with him, I don't want him to guess this is the reason why I don't want to meet again.

Well, I think there are two schools of thought on this one, Daters. On the one hand some people say you should tell someone the sex is bad otherwise they'll never learn, whilst others say to be more tactful about it.

I probably fall on the tell them it needs improvement side of the fence; it may hurt them but at least it's honest and it gives them a chance to sort it out.

On the other hand you don't really know him that well, so you don't owe him anything and aren't obliged to tell him.

Thanks Made. If I knew him better and could see the potential of a longer term relationship - I might mention it in a gentle way and work on improving it between us.

But I don't, and life is short, so I'll have to find a way of saying thanks but no thanks.

"so I'll have to find a way of saying thanks but no thanks."

Sometimes things are easier explained using sock puppets.