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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Oh God. I just went for my exH mistress...

126 replies

spook · 01/10/2006 13:19

Why oh why am I such a dick??? Just bumped into my exh and the horrible bitch he left me for. He is 48, she is 26. It's the first time since it happened-2 and a half years ago, that I have ever seen her-or them together and I just couldn't deal with the fucking smug look on her face.
But my boys were there and some friends and I just lost it. Calling her a whore and saying I'd like to land her one
I am so ashamed of myself and feel sick and dirty and really really stupid. I am better than that and have lowered myself to their sordid level.
I know noone will tell me its OK. Just needed to offload.

OP posts:
Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 10:05

The fallout with my ex has not been pretty thugh I can say...

OP posts:
anorak · 07/10/2006 10:05

Just thought of what you should have said:

'Oh , you didn't tell me you knew David Dickinson (turning to CSR) Mr Dickinson, I'm a great admirer of your work...'

Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 10:08

Snort Anorak
This is just a snippet of what I have had this week....

After your lunatic behavior on Sunday I do not want to see you in any capacity at any time. I am furious you did that.

He now texts me when he picks boys up so he doesn't have to look at me!!! PMSL!!

OP posts:
anorak · 07/10/2006 10:11

So you're to stay away from public streets in case he is out promenading with Judith Chalmers then?

anorak · 07/10/2006 10:12

For God's sake, woman, can't I commit adultery in peace?

Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 10:13

"promenading with Judith Chalmers"

OP posts:
Marina · 07/10/2006 10:19

Am working and sulking about it so big thanks to everyone on this thread who has made me ROFL citrus faced skip rat...fabulous spook

Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 10:24

Anytime Marina

OP posts:
Blu · 07/10/2006 10:40

LOL -he's just scared you'll do it again!

Judy1234 · 07/10/2006 11:07

May be it's good she knoews the extent of your anger and how much she's hurt you. People try to smooth things over with their new partner, say their ex wife or husband is fine about it so perhaps you've helped in some ways let her understand the hurt she's caused.

Anyway you don't need to see him. My ex comes to the door and the boys go out and I don't see him at all.

Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 11:14

Well she can't be in any doubt now Xenia!!

OP posts:
Freckle · 07/10/2006 11:19

I'm just surprised that he's prepared to be seen out in public with her. Surely he's just demonstrating a severe lack of good taste.

Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 11:28

Ooh-Freckle. Hi
Can I ask you something please++

OP posts:
Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 11:28

Ooh-Freckle. Hi
Can I ask you something please++

OP posts:
selma · 07/10/2006 11:49

If I am totally honest I am disgusted at this thread It smacks of jealousy and spite.This poor woman has done nothing to deserve this and to attack another person is undignified and the name calling is just school yard.I have been the partner of a divorced man and recieved similar treatment when I eventually met the ex wife even though I had done nothing wrong She was bitter and jealous and this was eventually the end of our relationship as she caused so much trouble.I hope to god your kids don't see this what an example!

fuzzywuzzy · 07/10/2006 11:53

Selma, the orange faced skip rat, had an affair with the husband of the op, she was the contributing factor in the break up of the marriage.

Spook has been fantastic for the past two and half years about this, and if she lost it once, well she's a bigger person than me, I'd have cut up my husbands bollox and posted them to his mistress.......

(Sorry I've lurked on Spooks threads in the past and have been silnelty routing for you).

BATtymumma · 07/10/2006 11:56

hmm - am i the only one who is feeling a huge lump of hypocracy over this thread? (im thinking of yesterday)

I actually think that although your behaviour was probably not your finest hour it is totally understandable and if after more than 2 years it was your first explosion i guess you have done really well.

if it made you feel just the slightest bit better then at least it had a positive.

Im sorry but the woman in question has done something worng, she was having an affair with a married man who had children to care for....she deserves every bit of public shame she gets!

Marina · 07/10/2006 11:59

Context is everything in this case selma. Most of us supporting spook here know the circumstances that led to her relationship breakdown and the disgraceful, utterly unreasonable and hurtful behaviour of her ex and his mistress.

Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 11:59

Mmm Selma. Maybe get your facts right before posting. I think you'll find the skip rat in question had done PLENTY to deserve a tongue lashing actually.
Thankyou BATtymumma and fuzzywuzzy! You're pals!

OP posts:
Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 12:00

And Marina

OP posts:
Amanda1 · 07/10/2006 12:01

Message withdrawn

Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 12:01

AND Selma-if I cause the end of their relationship I will be singing from the rooftops. As will half of Mumsnet.

OP posts:
Amanda1 · 07/10/2006 12:02

Message withdrawn

Original poster
spook · 07/10/2006 12:03

Thanks Amanda1!!

OP posts:
WaitingForGodKnows · 07/10/2006 12:06

Selma, perhaps you should make use of the search facility before sounding off next time. You may have been innocent, the CSR most certainly was not.