DRY 5

[allhailqueenmab]

Starting this before the old one gets filled up!
this is the thread for the alcohol free.
Join us!

Morning everyone. :) So good to see NewName and teapot. Welcome.

I have been feeling a bit - ugh for a few days. DH has gone away again for work and I feel lonely, sad, a bit fed up with myself. Danger time for me.

So, today I plan a treat. After DS's bedtime I plan to make myself a cup of jasmine tea, and instead of running around the house picking up toys and clearing up I will sit on our patio (such as it is) and read a magazine.

Anyone else have treats planned?

Forgot to say YAY FOR 9 MONTHS BIGGLES !!!!!!

Morning Cornchips. I've been a bit the same. It's very up and down isn't it! But great you recognise it!

Tortoise - I LOVED your blog today. As a Facebook addict (yup that's being addressed along with the sugar sometime after I get to 6 months) it really spoke to me. Hope you don't mind but I posted it on BFB - expect a little US traffic spike - and I'm going to link it here for anyone new.

afteralcohol.wordpress.com/2014/07/29/lies-damned-lies-facebook

Morning all. How is everyone feeling? Well done Biggles, that is brilliant and super inspiring. I am doing ok; I have got back on the running and although I am quite the sweating and unfit tortoise, I really enjoy it again. I have signed up to a 10k in September and I am actually looking forward to that.

I have a wedding this weekend and it will be the first one I have ever attended sober. I don't know if I am nervous about it but it is playing on my mind a lot. I know I will not drink and I do not want to as I am coming up to 5 months and it is the best thing I ever did, but I think I am nervous because I just have not done it before, ever.

Anyway, hope everyone has happy Tuesdays

Hello, from a cautiously positive person on day 2. Feeling ok physically and have found the perfect evening displacement activity - (apologies if tmi) delousing the entire family, took three hours and arms far too occupied with the critters (and kids) to countenance lifting a glass of wine. So the time passed. Not an enthralling occupation, but it certainly filled the evening - albeit not sure I'd want to repeat regularly.

Hope everyone is doing well.

PS - meant to say, Tortoise, that I also loved your blog today - resonated SO much. Thank you. Your clarity of thought and style kept me pondering and reflective even when I fell comprehensively off the wagon, though mostly I was too embarrassed to read sober-stuff then because it made me too ashamed of myself. Now back reading Seven Days Sober and itching to take it by the scruff of its neck and give it a proper proof-read. Or maybe just itching - see post below, and also that early-sober skin itch thing I seem to recall passed after a few days last time? Had also forgotten just how tired quitting can make you feel - so, with that, off to bed. Night all

Hi NewName. Glad your day 2 passed even if it was rounded off with delousing. There is something satisfying in getting the little buggers.

Kate - good luck at the wedding. I don't have one until September but it sounds like you are prepared & resolved.

Lucy - how was your few days away? I hope lovely - I missed your blog posts.

Off to bed. I only have one child this week as my eldest 2 are off camping. Very calm household.

Hello everyone, sorry I havent checked in much. I've had 28 dry days so far. Been out a few times and it's been ok. Best wishes to everyone here.

Evening all!
Sorry been buried under washing since we came back and only a few days in to hols and I'm refereeing between the kids already! Haggis thanks for asking after me - it was fab and my first sober holiday passed without angst. That's all the big sober first milestones done now - hurrah!!
Waves to all and will catch up proper tomorrow :)

amazing positive posts on here, just catching up.2 days, 28 days,9 months, all fantastic achievements I remember them all, my 2 days I couldn't believe it . Still feeling guilt, shame and self revulsion, but once I was feeling physically better and looking better, just got better hang in there, one day at a time
I am off to a ladies meeting OF A A this morning, didn't think it was my cup of tea but its great. so much laughter in the room, not bad for a bunch of drunks eh

although I am quite the sweating and unfit tortoise

Oi. That's MY role around here.

Glad you liked the post, Haggis & NewName. Thanks for the traffic, Haggis my love, always appreciated.

Lucy well done on the sober holiday! I'm really looking forward to having one of those. Holidays were becoming a problem, by the end, because although one has an excuse to booze it up every night, I was finding that without my usual stash, and my usual pockets of solitude to go and buy more alcohol, it was really difficult to make sure I had 'enough'. My last holiday was largely dominated by me thinking about how I was going to manage to drink without DH saying something. It sounds so, so much more fun to be able to go on holiday and just have all of that not be an issue.

Hi StayingDry - good to see you! Noshow - well done on 28days. With the day counting thing (and I am a counter!) it's so correct as Staying says that each day is it's own little triumph.

I am feeling a little more chipper. I am getting shit done!! Stuff they I have put off for ages. That's got to be the no drinking, right?

Girding my loins for my first sober holiday starting Tuesday. Yikes! But inspired by Lucy and Tortoises' words that it will be easier not to be thinking about bloody booze all the time. My only hope is that they have Fever Tree ginger beer at the hotel bar we are at . My plan is to enjoy time with the kids, cycle lots, go to the gym lots, get a massage - stuff like that. Pray for some nice weather in Scotland - though I fear they have used up their decades quota already this summer.

Hello again everyone.

Put out the recycling today. It gave me such a little lift of joy...... just 2 wine bottles and a couple of beer cans- all DH's. It used to be embarrassing putting my recycling out..... i'd layer newspaper on the top so no-one would see. :)

On the other hand, I have fallen insanely madly in love with a gorgeous art deco diamond ring at a local antique jeweller. Ahem. I think it would take up my ''not-drinking-wine-money'' for the rest of my life.

We have a holiday coming up too, and I am already feeling a little nervous. I keep telling myself to stay in the moment.

www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2014/jul/31/sobriety-tags-offenders-alcohol-related-crime-pilot-scheme-london

In alcohol-related news.....

cornchips, you're an expensive lady to keep I settled for a gazebo
I'm going for something a little more special I hope for my year.hint hint DP theres a lovely site you can buy sobriety jewellery from, after a necklace with my sobriety from date on.

I am expensive .... the ring was 46k. Seriously..... can you imagine being able to spend that on a ring??!! I can't imagine, but am happy dreaming.....Mind you, Jason Vale thinks the average (heavy) drinker spends 100k on booze in a lifetime..... Oh,it is so beautiful though. Sigh.

Actually- most of my not-drinking money is going on the garden. :) That is also giving me a great deal of pleasure.

I really like the idea of your necklace. I think marking such a big life change is really important.

I started to feel quite weepy and sad this afternoon. So have had a bath, and am about to listen to a meditation cd. :)

Hope everyone is fine and having a lovely evening. [waves] see you all tomorrow.

46k! Lordy goodness. Did you take a sneaky photograph that you'd like to show us?

I told you guys about my little writing room, didn't I? My budget for that was $1000, because I started the process on day 100 and I calculated that I was spending $10/day on booze. And it's almost done now! My little room. Squishy leather armchair from a charity shop, hot pink velvet curtains, turquoise walls, loads of throws and cushions. Oh it makes me so happy.

Haggis how many days are you now, can I ask? It sounds like you're doing beautifully well.

I've got to go and ring up the general manager of a big sober site and ask him questions today. I think he thinks I'm, like, a real journalist. Talk about faking it till you make it, I tell you what.

Oh I wish I did have a photo. I rang DH and asked him 'how many more years are you planning to live, and how much do you think you would be spending on me for birthdays in that time?'

Your room sounds fabulous tortoise. :)

Feeling a bit brighter this morning....amazing how good it still feels to wake up sober. I am currently watching a red sunrise out my window.

Happy sober days and glorious sober weekends to everyone.

tortoise, your room sounds great, a great gift of sobriety.
cornchips, I too have spent alot of great time working on my garden. time otherwise spent wastefully. I get loads of pleasure from the garden, very peaceful to be in and to look at.
it hasn't cost too much, I tend to "find" plants, l borrowed some ferns growing wild, there was millions, and I planted out my wee pond with reeds growing in the canal. all looks great and keeps my gratitude level up for being sober.
I truly believe that as recovering alcoholics we are so much more grateful for things other "normal" people take for granted, seeing the sun rise and set, children playing, a clear conscionce, all these things I for one never noticed in drinking.
I am always at my happiest pottering in my garden, not having to worry about what i couldn't remember, what I said, or embarrassed about what i had done. I don't want to be one of lifes big players, just happy and serene wil do me

Staying - what a fab post!!! I agree. I want to start doing stuff to my wee garden. You & Chips have inspired me.

Chips - loving that your rang up your DH asking for his anticipated total gift spend on you! Jaysus 46k - that must be some amazing ring. Do get a photo of it. You might be able to get a contemp designer to do a version of it?

Tortoise - so glad the room is shaping up so wonderfully. Is that the room at the back of your property you wrote about on the blog? Can't wait to see some photos too. And you know what - you are a proper journalist! Your writing is read by thousands of people - probably a lot more than some writers in obscure trade journals!

I'm on Day 48 today (thanks for asking Tortoise). Had a really fleeting moment of thinking - why don't I just throw the towel in (going out for dinner with my closest friend and her husband before they move away for good tonight ). Had some ginger beer & strengthened my resolve.

Hope everyone has a good weekend x

:) Haggis. DH sounded a bit taken aback when I opened the conversation with 'Sweetie, how many more years are you planning to live?

I LOVE the idea of getting a contemporary version made, thanks. What a great idea! I could get it done with crystal and agate or something like that. Gosh, that would be BEAUTIFUL.

Yes I agree also, Tortoise IS a proper journalist.

stayingdry, I have heard other sober people say that actually their former drinking problem can be seen as a gift, for exactly the reasons you outline above. I think there is something in that. I know that I have experienced feelings of almost overwhelming joy lately at little things.... watching my son concentrate on an ice cream for example. And also have had feelings of such poignant pain pierce me (when he was being slightly bullied last weekend and was completely oblivious to it and was his usual cheery self). A clear conscience..... not having to re-run evenings in my head to see if I made a fool of myself ...... heavens I am so grateful for that.

I was in a very risky situation last night. I popped out with DS to have an early dinner at a beer garden with friends. I thought I would be able to handle it, but it was really really really triggering for me. And everyone else was concentrating on their wine and conversations and I really did feel left out and unable to join in, which also triggered a bit of anxiety which was one of the reasons I used to drink. So we left early and I just felt awful when we got home, and binge ate half a roast chicken I was meant to be making soup with. So, this morning I have woken up with a new resolve to just be better prepared and not let it sneak up on me like that. We are supposed to be meeting up again today to go to a fete. I'll go early and have an excuse for needing to be at a playdate over lunch so I cannot stay as people want to be in the real ale tent. I will go, I will take my favourite bottle of ginger cordial and ginger ale with me so I have something I like to hand, and I will be cheerful.

On another note- I really need to lose a stone in about 5 weeks. I have put on half a stone in the early days of blood sugar madness when I stopped drinking, and was a stone overweight anyway. In 5 weeks I have a function that I really need to look reasonably good at. What do people think- is it do-able? I am pretty rubbish at losing weight. I'm on WW, but am not losing weight at all fast enough. I have made a huge bowl of veg soup and thought I could just eat that all day and then eat a proper meal at night. I can't exercise much as I have chronic back problems...... have a pilates dvd that is helping with that a bit though.

Sorry very long rambly post this morning. :) How is everyone?

Morning all!
Tortoise - room sounds fab
Staying dry - our garden needs some serious work - you've inspired me to start next week
Haggis - congrats on day 49 today
Cornchips - well done on resolve in tricky situation and forward planning for today. As for weight loss - friend of mine has been doing diet found on Groupon and will find out what it's called and come back to you. He lost over a stone and a half in a month :)
Kids hovering so back later ....

OK Cornchips the diet he is doing is called Exante and it's on offer on Groupon quite a bit. I believe from what he's told me (school bus stop chat) it's a 600 calories a day diet hence the rapid weight loss. Here's the link to the site www.exantediet.com/home.dept. I can't personally recommend it as I've never used it but it seems to be working well for him!
Off for a run. Happy Sober Saturday folks :)

Brilliant! Will check this out, thank you so much!

Thanks again Lucy. :) I have had a good look at that site, and the plan is based around meal replacements which I have never tried before. I have made an order for a one week starter pack as a 'try it out' kind of thing. I need to be very smart about this...... understand it is for a short time only, and not tip over into disordered eating. Well! Let's see!