The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Sipping Super Summer Mocktails Whilst Soaking Up Some Sun.

[Mouseface]

Hello, tis me, Mouse

I'm what some would call a 'controlled' drinker these day, but I wasn't always and I'm not alone on this wonderful bus, Gerald, when I say that.

We have drinkers who drink each day, those who abstain completely and those who are not sure what it is that they actually want just yet....

We won't judge you for drinking, no matter what your reason is, we've all been in your shoes somewhere along the way!! And we have ALL used every excuse under the sun too!

We have some Babes who ride on the Roof-Rack, (clinging on for dear life ) and then we have an expandable Side-Car, which some Babes use, but the bus, well, the bus, our wonderful Gerald, who takes us here and there, to pick up people in need of an unbiased and much needed ear to listen to. :)

There are lots of ears on this bus, and not a single one will turn you away and not listen!

Two things that we do believe here are -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

If you are lurking and reading this thread, there is a reason for it, isn't there?

Stay lurking or come and say hello! We don't always bite.

And for those who'd like a bit of history, HERE'S THE LAST THREAD

And of course, THIS IS WHY WE ARE ALL HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE, A VERY AWE INSPIRING READ

See you soon x

littlewhite I'm right there with you... Technically day 6 here but have been af on 10 out of the last 13 days and have not drunk past recommended levels anyway and today I feel like crap and am totally fed up. Woke up with a massive headache as if I'd downed a bottle of wine. Yuck! Plus it's bloody Friday. So it's wine night, yes? Grr. I think everyone's weekend should be cancelled, just for me...

Morning babes
Another sober week-end ahead. I hardly think about week-ends any more. I still occasionally get the odd OMG how I will I get through birthdays (done that, was great), BBQ’s, Summer etc. etc. I have this thing that I need to get through each occasion just once and from then on it will be fine. It’s like having a soft drink with a friend who is drinking wine. In the beginning you just can’t imagine how you’ll do it. And then you do it and really it’s not that bad at all. Then the when you’re faced with that again it’s not really a problem. So how many years do I have to be sober to get through every temptation/difficult situation once??

venus I battle to orgasm after wine so ‘sober sex’ is rather fabulous.

vicar took me ages to feel better. Just bear with it. But after a couple of weeks the quality of sleep is incredible. Omg, my sleep is amazing. And of course, feeling well rested gives me more strength to face the day. Sometimes I reckon people around me wish I was back in my safe little foggy hungover box. I’m a little more, forthright and sooooo much less tolerant. Sobriety has given me my moral compass back and anyone who deviates from it gets to know alllllll about it. I think when I was drunk and hungover all the time I didn’t have the strength or conviction to stand up to shit. I still have a job though. So that’s good.

Hello isinde no one cares here whether you’re drinking or not. Stay with us. The bus certainly keeps “not drinking” on your radar when you participate here so even if you’re not abstaining thoughts of us will be lurking in the dark mire of the back of your mind. Eventually, you’ll just have to step back on the bus.

Well done stepaway on going to the pub. That’s an achievement especially in the summer. It’s not so hard once you’ve passed a certain point in your mind and in the moment of the occasion I find. As soon as you order that first soft drink and not alcohol, you start to relax and enjoy yourself. It’s that first order that you need to keep all your defences about. Not sure if that makes any sense, but you probably know what I’m trying to say. Well done on 4 days. I found day 4-5 very hard. And trust me, I had lots of experience doing Day 4-5. Over and over and over again. What I’m doing now is a doddle in comparison.

demented how was your meeting?? Or is it still going. Come back with all the sordid details. You love sordid details.

Margaret well done on walking past all the pubs. Those hot days in the pub gardens are amazing. It must be incredibly hard at the moment to be surrounded by all of that. It’s easy for me. It’s dark, cold and raining here and I’m just living like a hermit which must be helping me hugely.

Good luck rural hope it all goes well. We’ll bring the bus around and come and visit you.

alias that’s one of my strategies for not drinking is that I know if I drink today I’ll more than likely drink tomorrow. It seems to be a combination of hungover (wine fixes that) and as you say, not feeling as strong. I fell of the bus once right in the beginning because my husband sweetly offered me a glass of wine and I just said “yes” and that was the beginning of another 2-3 week daily binge. So after that I told him to never offer me a drink. Ever again. Poor man can’t get anything right.

littlewhitebag it’s not instant, the nice effects. It took weeks, but anything is better than going back to what I was before. 14 days is amazing. Just keep going.

Hello spanna lovely mouse. You are lovely too though spanna annie baby, lovely baby thanks for remembering me in the middle of the night. I hope I didn’t scare you. beaches looking goodness I hope you sort everything out. guggs wry la Mad welcome back troopers. and all other lovely babes. Everyone on this bus is doing so well.

Hope I didn’t forget any of you lovely, mad lot. I’m off to the town hall tonight. Quite nice to do something completely random on a Friday night because (a) I’m not drinking and (b) I can drive there…..
See you all on the other side. Soc. xx

ladame oi! you think if you speak French you can sneak a green opal fruit from me? Think again! I've lived and worked in France a long time ago I was an au pair so my main job was hiding sweets from children (I can also tell fairy stories in French/insist that hair must be brushed/accompany a small child to the toilet and agree that her poos are magnifique / ask for nit lotion at the chemists.)

With heavy limbs, aching sinuses and a feeling of 'oh f@ck' I begin a busy day of deconstructing furniture, visit to the bank, solicitor and garage and the normal running people around and feeding them. All made so much harder because I drank 3 large glasses last night. It is NOT worth it. So why do I keep doing it? Use my miserable example as a reason to high kick the saggy titted WW to touch tonight babes.

Spanna what you doin in ma crib girl? I took you advice and let my eldest and his mate lose with Allen keys and screwdrivers yesterday and they dismantled a bed and a bookcase. New house is good, should be a good fit for us all. It backs onto an old railway route that has been converted to trails so great for walking the dog and biking. Hope you are feeling at home in your place now, do you get down to the beach much?

baby you are right, a new place is a new start. A new chapter and a chance to get off this hamster wheel. Sorry about the horrible nightmares you are having but I suppose it is the subconscious mind sorting through some of the stuff you mentioned. Hopefully they will settle soon, as you become more accustomed to your new voice.

soc it is really encouraging to know that you find it easier as time goes on. Those first few weeks are a real wrestling match but the thought that it gets easier is a real comfort.

Now because I really cannot procrastinate any longer today, (and I am desperately afraid that if I try and do a roll call I will leave some out ) I am sending each and everyone lots of love, strength and magic sleep sprinkles to you all xxxx

Well i went for a walk and reflected on how i was feeling. I have come to the realisation that i am lonely and that wine had become my best friend. It was always there, never let me down and made me feel great - until the next day.

I need something else to fill that void but i don't know what. Something that involves getting out of the house and meeting new people. Anyone got any excellent suggestions?

littlewgitebag I so get that. I'm not sure what to recommend. At the moment I'm sitting in a cafe/restaurant on my own stuffing my face with really decadent desert. I miss my faithful old friend but hate everything it does to me. I'm going to start Friday night yoga. Maybe I'll meet some non drinking earth organic types who'll entertain me with cups of peppermint tea and wheat free bread. I'm just fucking around. Some of my best friends are hippies. Those that still talk to me
:-)
But babes. I'm knocking off another sober Friday with barely a twinge.

littlewhitebag think you've hit the nail on the head there. We all get lonely when we sit in and drink rather than go out with friends. I got very lazy and found being indoors with family + wine much easier than socilaising,except of course,that easy isn't really very good for anyone.

I'm much better at contacting friends when I don't drink.I have some hobbies which give me things to make small talk about. Just going to the cinema or swimming /gym means getting out of the 'sofa and wine' habit.

It's a hard one to tackle but getting out to see friends is the best possible way to give the ww the kicking she deserves.Is there a rambling group near to you? Church group? Knitting group? Try anything at all because something might just work out as being a thing you love and can make connections to people. Good luck.

Also that feeling of being tired of it all is normal when you've given the ww the heaveho. Partly you are missing the booze and the fake high you get from it,not to mention the enormous amount of sugar. You miss the familiarity of it all and I bet that you have more spare time on your hands then you know what to do with???

Please just see this stage through,even though it sucks. It will soon pass and you will feel much stronger. Personally,I don't think it's helpful to pretend that sobriety is wonderful all the time, sometimes I feel shitty about it and have to make changes to what I do. I eat earlier or more or find a film to watch or just lose my temper and strop about like a 13 yr old with pmt.Just see it through even if you are white knuckling it,it will bugger off after a little while.

How about a treat of some kind? What do you do for treats? Make it bloody extravagant whatever you do. I caved in and lapsed when I'd allowed myself to get bored with it all.Looking back I was attempting to live like a particularly frugal nun. So ignore the advice about knitting groups/ church groups- fuck it. Get yourself out there and learn how to do something outrageous,find love,swim with sharks,whatever but don't pick up and don't cave in to the boredom.

Will shut up now. Promise.

loving all the banter but cant keep up with name checks
I am indeed the nork master and I have a meeting later today with distracted chap. Oh look, I seem to have accidentally put on a low cut top.....
indie here, have this.... Self loathing not allowed. Stay on the bloody bus, drunk, sober or in between.
beaches good to see you and ol spanna
ladame no you may not have un opal fuit vert. they are for rural to help her recover so the rest of you can keep your "mains sales" off them!
why is it I have to work in an office on a day like this - melting.
hope ds is ok and enjoying the holidays. how nice of you to ask after him

ma good luck with 'Distracted Chap' (is that his actual name?!)

Hi again and thanks for the welcome.
I didn't exactly win the battle last night.. but got it down by a glass.. it's a small start I guess. Tonight I am aiming for two glasses max. Not brilliant , but I KNOW if I say to myself 'right that's it', I WILL fail (been there done that) and my aim is to reduce it to a glass. Preferably with a few days with none a week.. but that's a slow long goal for me.

My biggest problem when I managed to go a few weeks before was the total insomnia that resulted. I'm a poor sleeper anyway (my wine has always been the thing to help me to sleep) and without it i was watching the sun come up..not ideal when I work in a job which entails being alert at all times. Has anyone any tips to help me with this? (non medicated tips, as I could get addicted to ANYTHING) I find sport..(I do a twice weeky sport) just keeps me awake, and I can't play my flute late at night to occupy myself or I may end up divorced!

It is lovely to be in the company of people who understand. I still don't know how I got from 'occasional glass' to 'get me a bottle NOW' , but my Dad is a (functional) alcoholic, and my Mum (divorced from him), freely admits she doesn't keep any in the house because she would always drink it, (she only has wine at visits) so I suspct there is a tendency towards alcoholism in my family.

I'll never keep up with names and the speed of chat, but will try :)

joey Je suis completely told off. I knew i wouldn't get one, it was mal suffi when Ma was giving them out. J'ai recu an orange one once (eeuggh) c'etait deesgusting.

petiteblancsac I know what you mean, some mornings when I have been AF for a while, I still wake up feeling like I sank a bottle the night before , but I didn't have the 1000 or so calories and my tongue isn't stuck to the roof of my mouth.

Guggs i saw some of the spideys getting on a ferry pour Angleterre xx

rural meant to send you my love. Hope everything goes ok babe.

Indie !!!! My veg patch is your veg patch (arf arf) - come on over, have some sneaky non-vegan cheese and a hose down, I'll wait at the end of the lane ....

Hi everyone,

Would you mind sharing your fave sobriety quote/phrase/saying? I am only two weeks in but would like to get a really nice silver bracelet with an inspirational quote engraved onto it, something I can keep with me at all times.

Thanks!

I'm not drinking tonight. If I post it here, I'll stick to it. Literally thought about a glass of wine all the way home. Pathetic really. I'll have completed a week when I wake up tomorrow.

The wine witch really can fuck herself.

The wine witch really can fuck herself

This was not meant to be your inspirational quote btw Fattymcbatty!

evening babes.

i still found it really hard to get up this morning and am starting to feel pangs...

dd and i had a day out today together, but i had to stop at the supermarket on the way home. I had some steak in for dinner for me and her, and i ended up caving and buying one of those mini bottles of red wine to have with it. (it was £1.49....and very mini)

i feel a bit of a failure but on the positive side i have only had that and nothing else, and it was with my meal. ive not got any other wine in and am not feeling the need to rush off and buy more so thats good i guess.

i also stocked up on nice "grown up" soft drinks and im going to crack one of those open in a mo. its nice soft drink weather anyway.....

i thnk i will struggle a bit over the weekend to stay completely off the booze because i dont get many weekends off and i have this one off, but one thing i have noticed is an increased desire to go out and do thiings....am toying with asking DH if he fancies an evening run out to the coast tomorrow with the dog for fish and chips on the sand....keeping busy is working for me.

i feel good about managing to have the mini bottle and stopping but i also think i need longer without anything, its too early days probably to try and have one every now and then.

think i will go and have a soak in the bath with a magazine and some raspberry lemonade.

Hi fattymcbatty
The obvious one is ODAAT.
One Day At A Time

Meeting with distracted chap went well....*fans self"

Oh yeah....
and I by his mischievous blue eyes....

I think probably the less I have to do with him the better.......

Well fellow bus babes, what an evening i have had.

Last week when trying to think of things to do to occupy Friday evenings i came across a show at a local theatre. The Bay City Rollers show. I took this to be a play, maybe with singing, about the BCR, and booked tickets.

Went off tonight with DH to find it was the ACTUAL Bay City Rollers!!!!!

Oh how i sang and danced and waved my arms about. Shang-a-langing and Bye Bye Babying all the way.

DH looked like and and .

I looked like and .

All on NO ALCOHOL.

We got chips on the way home and i am enjoying a cup of Earl Grey.

I feel much better about life now.

Hope you are all having a shang-a-langing Friday.