The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Sipping Super Summer Mocktails Whilst Soaking Up Some Sun.

[Mouseface]

Hello, tis me, Mouse

I'm what some would call a 'controlled' drinker these day, but I wasn't always and I'm not alone on this wonderful bus, Gerald, when I say that.

We have drinkers who drink each day, those who abstain completely and those who are not sure what it is that they actually want just yet....

We won't judge you for drinking, no matter what your reason is, we've all been in your shoes somewhere along the way!! And we have ALL used every excuse under the sun too!

We have some Babes who ride on the Roof-Rack, (clinging on for dear life ) and then we have an expandable Side-Car, which some Babes use, but the bus, well, the bus, our wonderful Gerald, who takes us here and there, to pick up people in need of an unbiased and much needed ear to listen to. :)

There are lots of ears on this bus, and not a single one will turn you away and not listen!

Two things that we do believe here are -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

If you are lurking and reading this thread, there is a reason for it, isn't there?

Stay lurking or come and say hello! We don't always bite.

And for those who'd like a bit of history, HERE'S THE LAST THREAD

And of course, THIS IS WHY WE ARE ALL HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE, A VERY AWE INSPIRING READ

See you soon x

wry that plonker does not deserve to lick
your bloody boots, you will find the strength to leave him because you are amazing, I smile every time your name pops up and your compassion and warmth towards others tells me all I need to know.

pink I have often thought about you and it does my heart good to hear about you phenomenal success. I'm so so so chuffed for you. I'm at a month but struggling with my weight as I'm using food as a wine replacement. Please share how you got so much weight off, I'd love your advice as you are a true master of your own success, your an inspiration to us all

Don't be a stranger xxx

Nice one Pink!!! Sorry, That's who I remember you by. YOU ROCK xxx

wry - I love that photo! I used to say to anyone moaning on and on and on at me as a did what the chap in the pic is doing "Sssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, what's that noise?"

Person - "Erm, I don't know"

Me - "It's the world's smallest violin and it's just for you!"

Just popping to say goodnight and that to those who think they will never be where they want to be with their ongoing battle with booze, look at Confused/Pinks post? Look at me? From 90 units a WEEK!!!

They think that I will always stand by is 'YOU REALLY HAVE TO WANT TO STOP MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD'

You do, sorry but you have to breathe it. Need it. Feel it. It is the only way. YOU have to start the ball rolling, then get the help you want/need if you feel you do.

Night gorgeous Babes, lovely to meet all of the newer posters :)

Be back tomorrow xxx

I didn't drink.

I didn't phone him.

He's in the cupboard with her. That WW one. He can have her.

venus, you're right. It's all down to me, isn't it? Not work. Not him. Not her. Me. My choice. Proper light bulb moment for me.

So why have I just woken up again at this ungodly hour?

I have mentally wodged LittleLab in front of the cupboard door to jam it shut. Good luck shifting her. I have to tip the lazy little article out of her bed in the morning to go out to pee.

I feel a snack coming on. Porridge, banana and peanut butter. See you in the morning lovely folk. xx

Well bloody done wry. fuck em both

xx

hi, can i join?

im going to go to my first AA meeting on weds. im managing currently to sip my way through about a bottle and a half of wine per night. that needs to stop. i have an incredibly stressy life involving a stressy job, stressy son with SN and stressy MH condition.....so am currently stressy. and driniking too much.

Welcome something. Like your name
I was on about 1.5 - 2 bottles of wine a day (depending on what time I started). It's a horrible way to live. Also have a child with SN, but I could use every excuse under the sun to justify my drinking. I'm good at that.

I'm on day 71 without wine which is nothing short of a miracle. I went to AA a few times and really liked it. I'm quite sorry it hasn't worked out for me (various reasons) as I would love to still attend meetings.

Stick around. The babes on this bus are fabulous and have been such a enormous help to me. Reading here and reading many, many blogs about sobriety has helped. I'd start with "Mrs D is going without" and read other blogs she has on her blog roll. It's really good to read about people who've been there and see what you're going through is normal. Well, there is no normal on this bus.

thank you.
you dont happen to have a link to those blogs do you?

the night before last i didnt buy wine. i felt great. i woke up feeling good.
but if its in the house i drink it.

Here try this.

livingwithoutalcohol.blogspot.com.au/

Welcomevicar
I think that is a good abbreviation for you. We need someone with good morals on this bus load of trollops.
Well done wry. Give yersel a bosie.

Today this bus is off to Liverpool to find indie

speak for yerself ma

Well...look who's calling us trollops....

mouse hooray mouse is back,now about those mints...
Very impressed with the pain clinic. Are you going to have a hip op?

baby hope you are ok after that fall from a big beastie? You've done well to stay off the sauce,you sound strong and calm these days. Lovely.

welcomevicar excellent advice from soc as usual. You will be much better off without the booze I just go to the one aa meeting and it's great for staying stopped. I'd recommend a women's meeting if poss.

wry good for you for staying off the booze and for the lightbulb moment. You can only look after yourself (and LittleLab) he can go sort himself out or bugger off

Apologies for not doing a full NC. I'm still sober and will not be drinking today. I have to say that hot evenings are a massive trigger for drinking for me and it hasn't been easy to stay off the vino,but as soon as I've had a meal stuffed face on cake I'm fine.Better than fine- who wants to wake up with a massive hangover in this heat? No thanks,I'd rather enjoy the day and then sit outside with a book long into the night.

Last night I watched the sun go down,sitting next to dh.This year that sunset did not spin round hopelessly,I did not feel sick,I did not have to pretend that I was sober or that I could walk in a straight line. If I had continued making myself unhappy by continuing to drink then I honestly believe that I would have eventually lost dh & ds. It's a nasty and progressive illness,and the ww can fuck the fuck off away from me and the bus,we want a great and memorable summer thank you very much!

Things get easier. I just cooked a big Sunday meal. Normally that would be a huge trigger. Drinking while cooking seemed excusable. By now I'd be the same guggs. Pretending to be sober. Talking slowly. Trying to stay awake. Wanting more and more wine. It's a shit way to live.

Instead. Here I am in my nuns habit. Reading. I'm mellow. I didn't even think about drinking while I was cooking. That was a revelation. The first time I cooked sans wine was so hard. Now it's great. And my cooking is better. Strange that.... But really, truly as much as I miss it sometimes this is a million times better.

There endith the lecture.

Someone correct my last sentence. It's not right and I can't for the life of me think what it's supposed to be.

Hi babes not posted in a while, everytime I try to on my phone i get a message saying the site is not safe? I'm tempted to ignore it as I think if I don't post I'll slip back into drinking wine everyday but I don't want to knack up my phone.

The past few weeks I've just been drinking lager, that was ok as I don't much like it so never have more than two bottles. It was nice to put the recycling out with no wine bottles in it! Here's the but...friday I decided to share a bottle of wine with H, it didn't even taste that nice but I told myself as I'd had less than 2 units all week it was ok Felt fine yesterday and didn't want any more until H said to get another bottle and it was like I had 'permission', the decision had been made for me. I drank it although I didn't enjoy, got annoyed with H as he wasn't drinking it and was like 'you made me get this wine so bloody well drink it!' Actually that was a huge about turn on a year ago - never would I have argued with him to drink more of the wine!!!

Anyway I can definitely tell I had a drink last night, got up late and still feel tired. I've poured the rest of the bottle down the sink. I very much agree with joey that after drinking wine for two nights it's much harder to stop. This has very much confirmed to me that wine is my problem, I can stop drinking it but it's much harder, and I suffer much more the next day.

Well done on nine months pink, I often think of you and I've wondered how you were doing. Amazing weight loss too, so inspiring :)

wry I like the idea of putting him in the cupboard with the ww. I can imagine him locked in the cupboard glugging a bottle of wine! I'm going to try and visualise whatever is prompting me to reach for the wine, in the cupboard with the wine, and the door firmly slammed

Great to see you posting again mouse, well done on 71 days soc, welcome vicar, waves to all babes

Today I will not be drinking

Hi, thank you for this thread, just finished reading through and feel inspired today on day.

I'm a heavy drinker - starts early and can get through two bottles of wine no problem.

Why can someone be so determined to stop but not be able to do it? The booze has ruined my life and marred every special event in my life over the last few years.

Currently lying in my bed as DH has taken away my DCs to get away from me. Have the shakes, I stink (literally) sweating like crazy and haven't eaten a proper meal for over a week. Tried so cereal this morning but threw it all up. This is bad right?

Everyone in RL was supportive at first but I've managed to isolate myself from everyone.

So right now.

Ohmydayz Welcome. I am a newcomer to the bus having just been AF for 8 days now. However, i have spent months dipping in and out of this thread, reading but never posting. Still drinking the wine.

One day a light bulb will switch on in your brain and you will stop. For now maybe it's enough to acknowledge you have a problems. The support on this thread is awesome. Keep posting, keep talking. It helps. Don't be isolated, come here.

Good Morning all Brave Babes

It's been a while since I've posted but read regularly

Soc Babe you're doing so well - I am so impressed, you're like a new woman - I want to be you

Beaches twinkle how are you doing sweet thing? how's the move going?

Why equally you sound amazing, it must be so lovely, comforting, dreamy to be with your DS

Ma - Number 10 - look at you!!!!

Baby how's your bottom babe? not too black and blue, I hope

I'm come out, come out where ever you are

I am on Day 2 today. And I will not be drinking today. All very up and down for me. I'm finding it really difficult not to drink. But I have got to the point where I simply can't afford it, same with smoking (yep I do that too) So I finished my tobacco last night and I'm going 'cold turkey'. I have been listening and reading the Paul McKenna stop smoking and have found that helpful. I am feeling ratty and feel deprived, if that makes sense

Saggy tits has already been whispering

Sorry not to NC you all but I think of you all often

welcome ohmydayz. Sorry you're feeling so shit. I hope you can stay in bed today. Drink loads of water. I found warm water helped with lemon. And if you can eat. This bus is amazing. Post often and stick around. It helps. Even if you post nothing but shite, it really doesn't matter. It's good to check in here and also good to post. I reckon making contact in any way is good. And this allows you to be anonymous so you can tell us everything. And you'll find most of us have been there done that so there is zero judgement.

annie the only thing not safe on this site is dementedma. But yes, I try and imagine having a glass of wine and I know once I have that first sip I'll want nothing less than 2 bottles and then the next day I'll drink because I've 'fucked up' so may as well have some fun. And back to square one. I really hope I've got the strength to never drink again.

baby hello. You're doing bloody well. I love your posts.

littlewhitebag 8 days AF is amazing. It's much better than 80 days (or whatever) because it's sooooo much harder in the beginning.

Good night. Soc xx

Ohmy welcome Babe and taking that first step of joining us on the Bus. Can you bring yourself to have a bath with some lovely bubbles or bath oil or a shower. Then get yourself in PJs onto the sofa and watch some shite TV. Do you have any sweet treats? I always find that a 'fat' coke and bacon sarney sorts me out

little Well done on your 8 Days x

Hi spanna, welcome ohmy

soc I find there is definitely something about wine, it's so much harder to control. i keep thinking of the Pringles add, 'once it you pop, you just can't stop', it gets to me in a way lager and spirits don't. It's funny years back I'd occasionally have spirits, quickly realised I went from tipsy to head down the toilet drunk, so stopped drinking them without a second thought. I've had some bad hangovers off wine but I still persevere with it, trying to stick to a 'safe' level

Thanks,, managed to drag myself up and shower. Would have had at least one drink by now - so little milestone for me.

Welcome dayz and ignore all the horrible things they say about me!
soc I believe the phrase you are looking for is "here endeth the lesson"
Good church girl here doncha know.
Just done 5 mile walk and am in dire need of a drink....so am having tea!

Thanks for the hellos babes. It's great to hear how well everyone is doing. Welcome Ohmydayz. I was where you are now a while ago. I kept slipping back, deciding to deal with it later, trying controlled drinking and all sorts. When will your DC be back? Do you mean they have gone out for the day or has your husband literally taken them from you?

Babyjane a month is amazing, well done! Tell yourself that as you have done one month you can do the next one (after all, you will only be doing what you gave already done once before) that worked well for me. Re the weight loss, I took one thing at a time. Someone said on here once that you should tackle the problems in the order that they're killing you (or something like that) so as drinking was my biggest problem I tackled that first so I would say in the first month I just concentrated on not boozing and I did replace it with ice cream etc. I had psyched myself up to stop drinking so then I just did the same for starting an exercise and healthy eating programme, I chose a date and got mentally ready. But I didn't try and do it all at once.

Someone said to me the other day that they think I have replaced the alcohol with exercise ie a new addiction and I think I probably am quite addicted to it but it's not doing me any harm so I am ok with that. It's better than wine. The rare times I imagine drinking again, I instantly think 'but it could ruin my running!' It's become a mental block to drinking again which can't be a bad thing eh!

It was so so hard at the beginning but I can honestly say it's easy now. I don't think about it and my body has gone so long without that cravings literally never happen, they do wear off, you just have to ride it out which I know is so tough and easier said than done.

Pink :-) X

Sorry, I am still catching up with all the lovely new Babes on the bus.

Well done dayz :) even the smallest steps build up to a mile of walking! You should be very proud of yourself. :)

Hey Annie - how's things with you? x

Soc - I hope things are good with you? Why is Ma not safe? Is it cos she hides all of the opal fruits? x

Guggs - hello you, looking back over this bus and the few pages, I really have missed you guys. I really have.

Yes, I need the op, I can't keep getting stuck in bed for 4 hours with pain spasms. There is nothing that stops is from happening. I just have to deal with it. No prevention, I just have to try and get through it with all of my meds.

We worked it out, I take at least 7,500. meds per year. That's without the addition of emergency spam.....

Anyway, I must go and grab some milk before the heavens open!!! xxx

im reading that blog.....it strikes so many chords. its frightening. and so is the thought that i will be giving up.

i want to say ill do it when im ready, but i dont think i will ever be ready. ive just been to the shop to get some foil, and butter, and im cooking tea for me and dd.....i told her i was going to AA and she is hugely supportive. she is 17. and wise.
i asked her if she worried about my drinking and she said yes, i asked her if she thought i had a problem, and she said yes. she said i drink alone and i "go mad with it".....

i told her i was going to the shop, and that i would probably come home with wine too.
and i did.

but im not kicking myself. ive decided to stop. ive decide to get support. i drink every day, so going from that to nothing is going to hurt.....