Am I being gaslit.....gaslighted......whatever?

[neiljames77]

When I split with my wife, I took only the things I thought I needed. Clothes etc. There are other things that I didn't need urgently though. One of them is the little pouch you get with your car containing the manual. It was tucked away in the back of a cupboard in the kitchen. It never gets moved or disturbed. For that reason, I keep my passport and driving licence etc in it because I know it's safe. I turned up at the house yesterday and it's gone.
I asked her if she'd seen it but she said she doesn't know what I'm talking about and she thought I'd took it with me. She's a really poor liar though. She said she'd have a look for it and let me know if it turns up. Is this gaslighting?

Mr nj I have read a lot of your posts and threads and 'villain' does not spring to mind!

i turned up at the house yesterday and it's gone

Sounds like she was having a rummage and got rumbled. It was probably pushed down the back of her jeans if you weren't expected...... duly photocopied now, natch

I do wonder if Mr neiljames would have got the same opinions on here if the OP name was was Nigellajane.... I do agree with frog too

:-)

Come on admit it...you man looked for the docs......when your wife looked they were there. HTH

Oh oblique I had forgotten about boy/man looking!my partner does this..If the item he is looking for doesn't step forward and introduce itself it doesn't exist. ..

You sexist buggers!!!!!
I emptied that cupboard and then put everything back!!!
Them docs weren't there!!

I suspect a case of 'man looking'...

she is going to blame male fridge blindness... which would be the logical explanation, if you had not emptied the cupboard.

thing is, who will bloody believe you?

Lamentably, no bleeder, that's who!!
I don't care. I've got my documents back. I'm happy.

If you'd posted this on a different board, Neil, everyone'd be blaming the supernacheral. And I'd be patiently disagreeing! On this board, though, I'm going with the consensus - you man-looked

Anyway, all good. Enjoy driving an ostentatious convertible across Europe!

Even my 4 yr old DS 'man looks' - can't find the shoes on his feet!

Whether you man looked or not Ketchup is right, time to move all you things out and stop referring to it as "home". Glad you got your documents back.

My dh 'man looks'. He'll rummage and mess everything up, and say it's not there, and it's right in front of him.

On a serious note, though, financial division of assets and any subsequent support should be fair and reasonable. Not driven by guilt, or as a way of still being involved in someone's life (why would you pay her rent rather than spousal support or a lump sum? It means you are still involved in where she is living).

See a solicitor and divide things fairly. I'd probably say go for a clean break, too.

I'm glad you've got your documents back, Neil. Try to brush this under the carpet- it could be perfectly explainable, but obviously keep an eye out for other dodgy goings on.
I don',t really care whether your split was amicable, that isn't what this thread was about. And those people who say that you deserve to have your things destroyed or that 'you're lucky it wasn't more' need to fuck off and get a grip.