The Dating Thread 73.

[MadeMan]

Hello and welcome.

Iv never been brave enough to message a man on pof, i know im going to have to bite the bullet, especially as it seems the ones who i like never message me...iv just no idea what to put :/

I will wait till after my holiday to send it. The geeky lookalike is just after sex, so that's ok. To top it all off, discovered my xH has been reading my posts on here and called me a slut.

4free I'd happily be proactive and message guys. Thing is, I can never find anyone I fancy enough!!! I think my bar's set way too high! -Are there any self help books on high self esteem I wonder?!

Dont it matters not a flying fuck jot, what your exH thinks.

4free....read their profile and refer to it in your message....shows you have read it and shown interest past his photo. Add some humour (not sleazy humour as I have been on the receiving end lol) and then ask a question. That way, if he reads your profile and is remotely interested, he will reply.
If he doesnt reply or you get the 'thanks but good luck in your search' message, develop a thick skin and shout "neeeexxxtttt!".
Go on...do it....I bet some of the guys will be flattered and respond....

Don't- I think it's a bad idea for you to send the message. You just need to try and move on. He treated you like shit and you should have better.

Louby- I'm not sure if I can face DTD ever again. The thought of it after only being with stbxh for 18 yrs plus two kids means I am so afraid of what someone will think of my body and bits! I may just turn celibate.

I may suggest a walk and a drink for date 3 then. That way maybe well kiss some more for practice :)

A quick question? When do you stop messaging or checking out pof if your dating?

thanks for the advice...i like your style flora...i will put my big girl panties on n try it!! although i am terrified and dont like the thought of been rejected

dont your exH obviously needs to get a life and stop stalking yours

OK, I just messaged a guy on POF who had his dog on his profile pic. I said 'gorgeous dog, I've always had boxers!! (that's the dog not the pants!)'

Let's see if he replies!!!

ha ha...he has!!!

I agree 4free and fifty - ex h needs to get a life. Thought about name changing but then I thought - why should I? I'm looking forward to my little caravan holiday tomorrow. No men, just me and the dc.

I think I will send the message. I have tried to move on but can't. Though if we got back together I'd have to remove geeky from my book. His bits are the best bits!

Ooh what'd he say fifty?

I feel that I'd rather have anything from him than nothing at all.

Really, Dont? You'd rather be embarrassed in public, have him resent your DC, treat you like shit, fuck with your head and have him think you're nothing better than a fuck buddy, than be without him? That's not love, it's insanity. Do you really think so little of yourself that you're willing to let someone shit all over you just so you can keep them in your life? If that's the case, the only relationship you need to work on here is the one you have with yourself. You're worth so much more but you need to see that.

I agree Dont...
ignore your ex.

"Hello by the way Don'ts ex, if youre reading. Now go organise your sock drawer instead of following your ex, yes your ex, who is entitled to have a life after you. Happy pairing (your socks that is)!"

fifty that message proper made me laugh ...i am now scouring pof to find a candidate to pop my message sending cherry..fingers crossed i find a hotty!! lol

dont enjoy your break away, its probably just what you need, lots of fresh air, walks and fun with your DC
please reflect and seriously think about getting back in touch with geeky, its like having a scab that you keep picking and not allowing to heal, your not giving yourself time at all.

bit odd really, he just said 'Me too. Me and my brother brought up with them as kids.' I replied 'daft as brushes but adorable'....

Then had another message, the guy just said 'wow, nice eyes', so...I click the profile to find 2 men (clearly father and son), thought wow, the son looks hot......guess what, the caption said (I'm on the right)....grrr, was the dad!!!

oh fifty...what did he say?

I don't love myself very much at the moment. XH told me today that the woman he's seeing has a much better body than me (he knows I was bulimic for ten years and I'm slim but body conscious). He did it to hurt me because he spied on me on here.

I just feel like geeky was special. Even though he did fuck with my head.

Thanks flora, I like that message to my ex. I second that!

Dont please don't give any headspace to your exH. He's an ex for a reason. And clearly he's fucked up if he has nothing better to do than stalk you on here. And every time he offers an opinion, tell him, 'IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK'.

Men obviously find you very attractive. That's because you are.

Enjoy your week away, spoil yourself [WINE]

Fifty...dont youjust hate it when guys make no effort in their response? I learned to delete those who gave one word/sentence answers. One guy kept messaging me saying "I fancy you. Do you fancy me?". When i saw him, i thought not bad and tried to strike up a conversation. But still the same reply..."do you fancy me?". I blocked him.
Now go find another fancisble guy...nexxxttt!

ha ha that should have been

heheh flora, I did note on his profile he's a trucker.....so wasn't expecting much!!!

Not that I'm truckist at all....

he was pretty hot though, don't mind a bit of rough on occasion!

Thanks for the wine, fifty. I'm going to have a fab time. If I find it ok.

Well you know don't it's not all about the destination....it's the journey too! Does this mean you might get lost?!

I start a new job on Tuesday....a new chapter I hope

I'm relying on my Sat nav - fingers crossed! Oh hope all goes well with the new job!

I'm not messaging geeky till I get back so at least he can't spoil my holiday.