The Dating Thread 73.

[MadeMan]

Hello and welcome.

Ah! Clever work detective :) just a tidy up much better tho

Cani, that sounds like a good rule. 3 days constant messaging before numbers. I've been sending photo when asked. Just need to get some better ones. You excited about your visitor? Wine might be good, but not too much

jesy I am getting confused. I might need a spreadsheet!

Do they all do this xxx constantly? It's annoying.

What's ppl plans for weekend ?
It just me this weekend family away and Mr IT busy I did suggest a late breakfast on Sunday but not getting hopes up I'm trying to let him do chasing.
Deep down I think rd just sex but then why be caring , text me every day, ask how I am ext be interested in me plus want to do non sex stuff ie swimming , shopping , cooking
He not like an ex who. Still texts but I know . With him it is just sex and he couldn't really c a re.

Lol, that's so funny about needing a spreadsheet! I did start to make a little list at one point.... also, yep they all put xxx constantly! A guy that I'm messaging on Tinder calls me Gorgeous and Sexy Bum all the time, totally puts me off, he's only seen 3 pics of me and never met me! I find that men are really full on before they've met you, when women can be (well I am ) quite standoffish until they've met someone, and then the tables turn when we've met, women like the guy and they start to become warmer towards them, by which time the men are on their way to running a mile lol!

OK right had 2nd lunch date with MBB.

I was left waiting with him for ages before he offered me a drink or asked about food yet he knows I was pushed for time (had 1 hour 15 mins).

Then he seemed to spend lots of time talking about him, his problems etc (not me). Then when it came to the bill I think he would have got it but I was polite and said yes let's split it so we did? That was ok but I was sort of why did I agree to that and then thought well done it now... This is only because my mum, brother and several other people I know (men!) have views that a man when you're dating him for first few months should generally pay for things. hmmm??

I mean it was ok but I felt rushed, he will meet me soon for drinks...

don't know what to think.

jesy maybe take it easy with IT guy and his plans apart from sex and see how it goes... what vibe do you get off him?

I was seeing someone for dinner but changed to tomorrow night so now home alone tonight - but hungover so best place for me!

Monday I think day trip to beach with friend or country walk.

That he likes me ,he was concerned last week when I was upset , wanted to see pic of . My night out .
We have a laugh together and we constantly touching ect. Plus he cuddly at night to me y oh can't fake that

denton that's so true about them being full on. I'm v cautious at first, till I decide I do like them.

2 out of the 12 have asked for sex. I'm shocked by this maybe I'm too naive?!

superfly he doesn't too attentive does he? I think splitting the bill is ok though. I wouldn't want to owe them anything, if that's how they think.

Rummi the thing is he was very attentive during emails and yet today (2nd lunch date) it was a bit stressed (on his part) but he told me (it made sense) re his recent relationship breakup - I didn't really want to know but it fitted in with what he's been up to but he says he moves on easily.

I don't know. Bit jaded by OLD.

Rummi that's awful re 2 guys asking for sex guess they're chancers!

That's prob why I don't do/haven't tried Tinder!

This was on pof! One was in a relationship. Other said what he wanted to do, blocked him, told him he was out of order.

It's tricky isnt it when one has recently broken up. Actually I don't get it, he moves on quickly but still being affected by break up?

Welcome Rummi it's an eye opener isn't it this dating malarkey!

Well I met MrNurse pleasant couple of hours - I dove 30 minutes to his hometown, he doesn't drive which I think will be an issue for me

He's a nice, decent, steady bloke. No awkward silences, lots of talk about his children/ex wife which I always steer clear of on a first date but I'm the first person he's dated since he split last summer, so I think he needed to explain his situation. He's got a gorgeous smile and he walked me to my car!

I've said I'll see him again but I'm not so sure today.

I've cancelled date #2 tonight, he lives an hour away and I've decided it's just too far, plus his texts have been very sporadic over the week - I just feel like he hasn't given much away about himself.

I've still got a date lined up for Sunday evening, he seems a real character and is local to me.

Tonight I'm enjoying pizza, wine, chocolate and Gogglebox!

jarlin I'll join you, I've just started my 2nd glass and it's only 7pm. Think I need to slow down.

The no driving thing for me is strange! I know lots of people don't, but if he came to my house he would have to get a train and 1 maybe 2, buses. It's just odd that a 45 man has never learnt to drive!

Regarding splitting the bill, I don't mind a guy paying for an odd drink but I always pay for my own meal.

Thank you for making me feel v welcome. I've wanted to join in since thread 26! Maybe that's why I didn't make too much noise when my ex moved out?

louby mr nurse does sound lovely. Though I might ask him to meet me half way. Can he get train?

jarlin I'm going to have to set my filter on high. The kissed thing is very annoying.

How quickly do you disclose real name, or which area you live. I've been asked directly and have said which area. But it actually ,makes me feel uncomfortable.

Jarlin - I don't mind paying at all when in a relationship but say for meals etc - but I'm fine with lunch - a few people have said "if a man doesn't treat you for first few months that's not right" - I sort of agree but sort of don't. Like I'd get cinema or something.

Rummi - I broke up with someone mid Feb but am over them but he said he's not affected by the breakup but I think he is. Basically about 2-3 months ago his ex-GF was going through a court case to do with her divorce (access to kids?) and he was seeing this woman for 2 years - he says none of his friends liked her, she was a coke user and that he was well off out of it. But he said he'd been doing up his flat, studying for belts in Kung Fu (hence name as he's boxed too) but says it was a bit stressful. Now he's having acupuncture (as of this week).

I'm not sure if there's too much (see above) for me to take in - especially re the relationship. Maybe I'm being too judgmental.

Louby - I really don't mind paying for own meal but I do think it sort of is silly when you're splitting bills all the time especially when one of you (MBB) in his case earns significantly more. I think if I was in a relationship I'd be happier with paying for my meal! Sounds really silly but as I said before my mum,brother, friends (male friend being one) have always stated "a man should pay generally for you during first few months of new relationship" - am I really old fashioned or are they?!

I did have with Kent Lad a few times (he didn't eat in the evening or sometimes didn't) minor quibbles whereas I wanted to get something to eat (nothing huge) - he either didn't or was fussed paying yet if I got a voucher deal and then paid for both of us he was fine with that! huh?!

Jarlin how has it got to this with slow? is it nerves? do you think he's not serious enough about you?

I know he's slow but thought you were happy with that/him.

Louby Nr Nurse sounds nice but if there are red flags (however minor) already and you can't see past them, I wouldn't bother.

Or am I being picky and harsh?!

Rummy, I'm no expert but I swapped names when I exchanged mobile numbers. I only gave my first name though which is a common name so he was unlikely to use it for anything. As for area I live in, I just gave the town until date no 3 when I had had time to Suss him out etc then he picked me up from the house instead.

This is probably tmi but ready for my big night tomorrow I now have piles Ffs,! How am I going to get round this one? I could say I have my period so he doesn't attempt anything, or I could just say I'm not quite ready to DTD yet.

jarlin he lives/works in the same town! It's a town that's been in the news a lot recently regarding its hospital.

His family/friends all live in the same town. His ex-wife is also a nurse and drives. He's also a big 'gamer' (Xbox) which is also a red flag for me too!

I bet if I spoke to his wife she would say him not driving and his use of gaming are the reasons they split - cynical?? I may be completely wrong of course.....!

superfly my spider senses would be tingling about him. But I don't like inconsistency. It confuses me.

Hmm, guess I revealed too much too soon. If they ask for name, area I can say not yet? Or make one up?

Being treated is good, but early on I think it changes the dynamic. Maybe it depends on the age of the person?

Just realised how lonely I am , Mr IT busy all weekend with football stuff.
Tried to go swimming on my own today but felt pathetic ,I've cleaned out my wardrobe bb e n eaten to much is it this till Tuesday ?
$sorry to be so down I'll sound daft my dog not here and I miss her

I'm going through that bit where you've been constantly texting for a month and then there's no one asking you how your day's been again. It's awful :( also the guy I finished things with before they got started went nuts at me two evenings ago, was quite vile and I was shaking. It upset me to be reminded you just really don't know these people at all.