This is quite long, sorry!
I don't want to say too much about the things he said that reassured me, because that's his private business and not for me to share on here, suffice to say that he's reassured me sufficiently of his intentions. I wouldn't go so far as to say I no longer have any worries, but my worries are to do with my own insecurities rather than anything he has said or done - I'd have the same insecurities and fears with anyone! If I only focused on what he said and did, I'd be on top of the world and never coming down right now. 
He said a couple of things when he was drunk when we'd been seeing each other for a couple of months that at the time I thought were nice to hear, but I didn't put too much stock in them (especially as he was drunk!). He said them again when we were away when he wasn't drunk (he had no recollection of saying them previously) and explained it all. It makes total sense.
Until very recently, I was very much protecting myself against falling for him and he pretty much said he was doing the same. But he said that he knows he can trust me and he likes that. He says that I do do things that make him feel jealous but that he'd never try and tell me not to do them, that he trusts me not to 'do anything' and that if he ever found out that I had he'd be really hurt but would also know it meant I wasn't the person he thought I was. I can't really argue with that!
There are still things about him that mean he wouldn't be a 'forever' choice, but I'm not looking for 'forever'. And he isn't either, really. I have my children, my home and my life. He's met my friends and my children and they all liked each other, but I have no desire to be a 'couple' and take him everywhere I go! But in terms of love and adventure... he's just what I want and need.
I was thinking about it as I drove back from the airport, and I think he will be the one to finally brush my mother's cobwebs away. My mother would have 'expressed concerns' about everything that led me to the point I was at yesterday (well told me I was immature, irresponsible, foolhardy and when it all went wrong it would be my own fault...): doing OD and meeting strangers off the internet; dating a forriner; staying in another country with his family when I didn't know them and don't speak the language...; then I flew back alone and drove 3 hours home from the airport with nothing but the road signs and Lou Reed to get me here. In fact, if I'd still been in contact with her, I wouldn't have done any of it. She was just so scared of the world and life and made me feel the same, but not anymore...
He was so kind and thoughtful; he protected me and made me feel safe. He's not perfect, after all, he's only a man... but he's already asked me to go back for a few days in the summer and I didn't feel freaked out by the idea of making a plan so far into the future...
So anyway, it was a really lovely and romantic few days, without a single cliche in sight... and that's what makes him perfect for me right now.
I read dont's comment upthread about love being an action and something you do, and not something you say or even something you feel. And if that is the case (which I think it is) then this week he has shown me that he 'loves' me very much. And it's just so nice.