I'm a mess. Marriage is over. Kids hate me.

[SalfordSky]

I'm sobbing my heart out. I've finally realised my husband loves me but isn't in love anymore.

OP call the Samaritans. Your DC will not hate you.

Why are you not actually saying whats wrong.

OP you started this thread and people are here willing to listen so tell us your story.

woah there - you are in no state to be making ANY decisions!! You need to get through tonight - ring the samaritans, ring a friend, talk to someone please?

Has your DH left? how old are your children? how many do you have? Have you taken anything? if so, you know you have to call 999 don't you? have you been drinking?

Talk to us - tell us whats happened, we can chat to you if it helps, tell us what you want/need us to do?

Salford I am in your situation - here to handhold. You will not be doing your kids a favour, it is bloody hard I know. DH left 4 weeks ago and all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and never wake up again - however I do have DS and he is what kept me going. 4 weeks on I am still sad, angry, broken, devastated ..... But I know my DS needs me more than ever - just as your kids will.

Talk to someone in RL, call the Samaritans, PM me - just don't do anything that will hurt your DCs

Calm.....breathe......
People here will listen and try to help

Hup x

Thank you loggins. It is tough but the OP needs to know she is not alone!

can you let us know you are ok? please - i know you are hurting and things seem bleak just now but you have happiness in front you, yes you may have sadness and pain but there will be joy - your children will bring that to you. How old are your children?

Hup, thts very brave of you to post support x

Hey Salford .. Please please please call Samaritans.. I've been where you are. Teetering on the edge.. It's the bottom of the well..it's dark and shit, BUT please just pause and sit down and talk to someone, anyone. Your kids do love you . A few years ago I needed to talk to Samaritans every day... And you have us lot too. Here's a big squeeze .

Salford - you are scaring people now. Please can you respond and let us know you are OK.

I know it feels like the best thing to do as you feel so worthless, but suicide isn't the way out. Your kids need their mum, they love you

Hi Salford, do you have anyone close by you could call? Who could come over? You could probably do with a real hug. Can I send you one for now? I don't know you but I can't bear to hear someone so upset as you sound.

Thinking about you xx

am hoping the OP has gone to get some sleep - I have to go to bed now but will check on this thread in the morning, all we can do - please find help OP and keep yourself safe, your children don't hate you, even if they are emotionally lashing out - they do that with their parents because they feel they can, NOT because they hate them but because they know that their parents love them enough not to walk away. You are their world, just as they are yours.

I think what Cinnabarred meant Salford is that we become the victims of suicide (one of my parents to) I cannot begin to tell you the pain.. It's ok to feel the way you are, there are reasons why you are feeling this way, and they are things that can and be sorted. Don't be afraid to get help, do it now, this will be strength, make the right choice, because thats what life is all about.. Your children need you more than anything or anyone, they always will, not matter what they say to us, when one of mine says they hate me, I smile and say to them "great, then I am doing a good job! (I do have my bad days too!) above all you are loved and needed, just remember that. Big hug x

I'm ok. I'm upset. I don't know what to say. I'm in so much emotional pain. Suicide seems beautiful right now.but I won't. Thank you. And I'm sorry.

Well, I hope you have fallen asleep and will come back in the morning so we can all support you
Or you are reading this not knowing what to think. If that's the case, just one thing to let you know...no one will be better off without you, no one

Never been so pleased for a x post.
I'm so sorry you are sad, you have nothing to be sorry for here

Thank you for posting.

Just saw this. Please keep posting, I'm in a different time zone and I can be online for hours yet. Can you tell us what's happening?

The emotional pain of what you're going through cannot be understated and I know that going to sleep and not waking up seems very attractive when you are feeling the way you are now. I've been there and am still there now and then occasionally.

You just have to focus on getting through the next few hours, leave tomorrow for now. Do you have anyone to talk to, my family and friends kept me sane. If not stay on here MN has helped me often at 3 in the morning when I felt I was losing my mind.

Be kind to yourself, small things like having a bath, putting on some favorite films at night sometimes helped me to get to sleep.

You can get through this but I know how hard it feels right now.

Been married for. 17 years, 19, 14 and 7 year olds. He is a charmer. But bored with me. I do everything for kids. Gave up my degree. They talk to me with contempt (not the little one). He is a hard worker. But lives for work and sport with ds. We never go out as family or together. Mentioned so many times. Forgot out anniversary for last 3 years. Kids didn't bother with Mother's Day. I went to see solicitor last week. Said this weekend was last chance (I again arranged to go away with him alone to see friends and do lots of things he likes). He was funny and charming until alone with me then distant and cold. I feel ugly around him but if out with friends I am hit on all the time. I don't want to be wanted by anyone else. I've tried talking. So many times. My kids are only nice if they want something then if I say no they switch like rats. I literally do everything for them.

I've no job. No degree. No family. Just my 7 year old. Were it not for her I would happily, willingly and joyfully go right now.

I've been crying on the sofa for 2 hours. Only my 7 year old came down (I said my back was hurting).

I am so lonely

You have every right to feel as you do. tonight might not be about answers but just talking (even just on here) might help. Articulating your thoughts with people willing to listing could be a relief.

Try it. x