So I'm to fat to have sex with!!!

[Katecake]

Since I got pregnant (unplanned) things have gone from bad to worse, was already having issues regarding his drinking and some messages he sent to a ex while drunk and he really did not want the baby, he seemed to change his tune when I was 6 weeks and said he did and was looking forward to having baby!

So now this is where we are, in 16 weeks pregnant, I'm very slim and 5"6 and a size 8 being 4 months pregnant I have got a little pot belly really nothing major people at work etc havenot even noticed yet!

Since we got back together we have not had sex at all, not a cuddle anything! He constantly says things like we will have sex after the baby is born and I have got my figure back or that he could never get a hard on for a fat girl etc!

If I was 38 weeks I might understand this but I have always been lucky that even after 3 pregnancies in 3 years I have always snapped straight back to a very slim size 8 with no stretch marks etc and good boobs because I have implants from when I was 22!

Now my problems here are the ex he was messaging last year begging for sex was not the Slim 19 year old model he was with, 14 years later and a few kids she is holding a lot more weight!

He is actually making me feel shit about myself and it upsets me, we have spoken about this a few times over the last few weeks and still he has made no effort!

Today we had crossed words about it and he just went home claiming a a hormonal pregnant cow!

I'm just starting to think this might not be about how I'm looking at the moment maybe more that he just does not want this baby atall and is feeling trapped into having to do the right thing!

I just find myself crying every weekend, I feel gross and can't get my head round why he wouldn't want any intimacy with me (the girl he apprantly loves) but would message a overweight ex for sex!

just starting to wonder if it's worth it, should I just end it and let him off with the responsibility of being a father?

His comments are bloody appalling. Hope you are Ok Op You are better off without this immature nasty bastard.

Knob.

Sorry 2 words GET RID!!! Men like this make me so mad dont let him put you down or knock your confidence, my god id give anything to be a size 8.

He sounds horrible, and a total coward. Hope you and your dc can be around more positive people with human views from now on, looks count for very little in the end..

dont listen to these idiots on here i understand everything your saying and if the ex is fat she's fat get over it you lot it seems as if he's putting you through hell because he doesn't want to be with you no other reason i am also 16 weeks pregnant and im leaving my unstable partner you have to be strong and some times you realise how bad a relationship is when you think about putting a baby init so i understand completely please be strong and im sure you would never want your baby to hear anyone talk to you like that so don't allow it all the best and good luck

Sorry summer who are the idiots?

That sort of abuse (yes, it is abuse) will not stop & will probably get worse. You have more than yourself to worry about now so concentrate on yourself and your baby. Do you want your kid to be embarrassed by its dad?? Not cos of his weight, but cos he's an asshole?

Apparently, the "idiots" are the people advising OP she doesn't deserve to be treated badly by this twat

just tell him to fuck the fuck off and don't look back.

I think "the idiots" is referring to the people who were accusing the OP of being size-ist for mentioning the Ex GF's size. I have to say that I think that that is ridiculous. She mentioned it to demonstrate how stupid his comment was about her being a "fat cow", when his ex that he was begging for sex is several sizes larger. It was just to make the point about what a wanker he was being, and how he was picking on any little thing he could think of in order to get the OP to dump him so he didnt look bad.

no the idiots are the people reading someone going through a hard time and giving them a hard time about there views on weight if some ones over weight they're over weight, that's all she tried to say and then tried to explain her own weight and appearance which helps explain her dilemma. Sometimes its nice to see when someone needs gentle advise and not judgement.

Thank you Any

So let me get this right summer you are calling posters who have encouraged the OP to have more self worth and respect and LTB due to him being an insensitive emotionally abusive prick, idiots?

Could you please if explain to me why you think this?

thank you bogeyface couldn't believe no one had got that one in before me

X posted.

it didn't sound like encouragement it sounded more like scrutiny to me, plus she had to explain how she looks and sounds in better shape then the ex which helps explain the story

summer, do you believe the Op has been given bad advice on this thread ?

or do you think she should stay with this prick ?

slagging other women off even to make yourself feel better is not ok, do you get that at all ?

call the blokes out on the women hating crap...don't join in with it

OP is making it clear that the woman her lovely BF is messaging for sex is less attractive than her

does that seem like the blame is placed in the right area, or does it reinforce the competiveness between women for arseholes like this ?

just found the lecture about her weight views was a little quick considering she wanted advise and is having a terrible time end of if anyone doesn't get that i cannot help

I suppose it depends on if anyone thinks your kind of "help" is constructive, or not

the mans a prick but saying some ones over weight if its true is not an insult i myself have been over weight if you went to the doctor they'd tell you your over weight they're not insulting you they're explaining what your weight range is.

I think the point is that it doesn't matter what the other women looks like or what size she is. That is not the issue. The issue is knob head BF.

but to explain how untrue the comment is the weight does come in to practise

OP is making it clear that the woman her lovely BF is messaging for sex is less attractive than her

No she wasnt.

She said that he said that he wouldnt have sex with her because she was a "fat cow" and he couldnt get turned on by fat women. The woman he was begging for sex is several sizes larger than the OP, this is fact. It is not slagging anyone off, it is just showing that what he was saying to the OP was utter bullshit and that the real reason he didnt want sex with her was because he wanted to dump her but is a coward.

If he had said he couldnt get turned on by women with big feet when the OP was a 5 and she pointed out that the GF was a 7, no one would have accused her of slagging the OW off!

Who said that size and attractiveness are linked? Not the OP, I think that it says more about the accusers than the OP.

i agree bogeyface

It sounds as though he still wants to be with his ex to me. Not a nice bloke by the sounds of it.