The Dating Thread 72

[LizzieBelle]

Welcome

Softkitty Well just bought that book as you seem to think it could help, I am definately doing something wrong. Have you ever used his suggested techniques.

Just got a text from Date on Friday, saying enjoyed dinner but distance is an issue ( 2 hour drive) and not sure how compatible we are. Well at least no mid games there.

Blossom did he really text he wasn't sure how compatible you were?! That's a bit ahem rude if he did say that! But at least he's honest (blunt!) re both and no mind games. I'd take that over mind games idiots anyday.

Fellow online daters. I'm new to dating and started messaging some bloke, he seems nice but I feel like I'm interrogating him. I don't know if I'm asking too many questions or if he isn't being forthcoming about asking me similar
I am nosey and I guess in my head wonder how a decent bloke at 40 could be single so maybe Im worrying about it and looking for clues in his answer.
So obv he knows I'm single but hasn't asked me why. Isthat normal?
Do you find the men don't worry so much and therefore don't care if you have kids or why your single? Do they not ask as many questions as women?

Maybe its me. Maybe I want to know too much too soon!

hello do you think it rude, should I have asked him what he meant. Like you say at least no stupid mind games. He was a very direct person actually, shame I did kind of like him but distance was a pain. Need to find some local talent

Blossom it's not that rude but it's very blunt after I take it only one date. Maybe he just got the vibe from you that you both weren't very compatible and didn't want to mess you around, which is admirable actually. I suppose with my viewpoint on it, he didn't have to say that, the distance fine but not necessarily the other... but like I said earlier maybe I'm Little Miss Supersensitive at Times!

But then again he could be that sort of person and just very direct.

Wish I knew what wrong with me

can how long have you been chatting? What sort of questions are you asking?

I didn't ever mind anyone asking why I was single, but it is personal information about me and my life and so I didn't want to tell people straight away.

Why do you feel like you're interrogating him? Do you chat about stuff, or just quiz him on things? Do the questions spark conversation or is it just about information gathering?

I wouldn't worry too much. He might have been doing it for longer than you. I find that in the early days it can be very overwhelming, but as time goes on you get the hang of it and get a feel for it all.

Good luck!

jesy I don't think there's anything 'wrong' with you. I think you're probably pretty vulnerable at the moment and things are a bit skewed because of this.

Did he actually end it, or are you just assuming this because he said he didn't want to get serious? What does he mean by 'serious'? Does he not even want to be 'exclusive' or does he mean that he's not thinking marriage?

I agree with the backing off bit and playing it a bit cool.

jesy sadly I think you need to have skin as tough as Rhino for this. You know stupidly when I started to doing a month or so ago I actually used to believe thing people said. Not now it is all bullshit untill proven, how sad

He said didn't want serious and tbh I don't either ,I was having fun nights in and out good sex cuddles affection, didn't want more.

But has he actually ended it then? If you both want the same thing, what's the problem?

(Or are you doing that thing where you tell yourself you don't want serious when you secretly do; deep down. Only you can't quite admit it to yourself because you think if you say you don't want serious you won't get hurt...)

To be honest not serious is good I'm trying to get my work life in order ext but he was a nice distraction

That's fab Don't and so very spot on!!!!

Bet this is taking your mind off Geeky eh???

Totally. I want to make it work so I can send geeky a signed copy! Tomorrow's date, the v hot me jaded is helping too.

Have I missed any? Just received a v long generic message from someone who loves hugs. My first thought was that'll be great for the book!

*Mr jaded

dont I am lovin the book. Had a great one tonight "wow you look georgeous in Red but the dress would look better by the side of my bed" lol

Well I did casual text but n o answer its ok I wasn't good enough

jesymaybe give him a chance, men are pretty crap @ texting

I'm hoping in a way he just had a panic as the other night he so attentive

dont....am loving your stuff! Am starting to think about OLD again after 5 years of not!

Jesy If you don't want to be serious either, surely there's no problem? If, however, you do actually want more from him than he's wanting to give, then pursuing him will only make it more painful for you. I think you need to be completely honest with yourself about what you really want. I've recently been in a very similar situation with MCS and I still pine for him a bit, but the longer I don't see him, the easier it gets. Move on my lovely, because he isn't good enough for you. Stop thinking it's you, because it's not.

Blossom I've tried a few of his techniques and tbh they do work quite well. I'm actually going on his seminar in London in June, it's only £20 if anyone else fancies going - Matthew himself is hosting it phwoar.

If anyone else wants his book I downloaded my copy for free - just google 'Get the Guy free PDF'.

Folk,
It's hard because it's on tinder and so there's not much in his profile to spark a conversation from.

It's gone something like this
Him Hi, you have a beautiful smile, how's things
Thanks, things are ok thanks, busy but good. How about you?
Yes good thanks
So what type of job do you do
I do x
Oh that sounds interesting etc etc

I asked him how long he had been single, was he on other sites, what was he upto this weekend. I just feel that I was doing all the asking and he wasn't giving me anything to go on in his texts to reply back to. I know my ex was a crap texter and so wondered if most men in general find it difficult.

In the end I told him I was sorry if I was asking too many questions and as I felt like I was interrogating him it was now his turn to ask me. He replied good humoured and seemed ok with it and said he had no problems answering anything.

Arrghh whatsapp has me like a crazy loonball,online,last seen but yet still no texts,why do they drive us so mad?I would prefer to be told see ya,not for me thanks.
Is it a known fact that guys just hate texting?