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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is it ever ok to sleep with a colleague?

63 replies

JetSetWilly · 26/03/2014 20:29

I imagine most people will say no.. Why? Consenting adults, single (obviously), keep it professional

Does it always turn to shit?

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 26/03/2014 20:30

No, not always

Too many variables though to give a comment on individual cases.

Both single ups the odds of it being perfectly ok though

ElizabethX · 26/03/2014 20:32

You have to be sure you can disentangle cleanly if it all goes tits up. Dropping contact is obv not an option!!

Ludways · 26/03/2014 20:35

I got with a work colleague 15 years ago, we have 2 children and have been married 10 years this year.

Obviously it worked for me!

JetSetWilly · 26/03/2014 20:36

Thanks for your input

Both single.

On different floors so contact could be minimal if necessary ie Xmas and summer party.

Different teams but equal standing

Got the impression everybody always says no no no - bit unprofessional?

OP posts:
Flexiblefriend · 26/03/2014 20:36

I hope so. I've been married to a colleague for 10 years. I think he'd be a bit upset if I stopped sleeping with him now. Grin

morethanpotatoprints · 26/03/2014 20:38

I've been married to mine for 22 years, and have 3 dc, I hope not Grin

ImAThrillseekerHoney · 26/03/2014 20:39

Why on earth not? Your boss might be a bit problematic, or if you have to work in a small team forever, but different floors should be fine.

AnyFucker · 26/03/2014 20:39

In that situation, I would go for it

NurseyWursey · 26/03/2014 20:40

Yep.

It's how me and DP met. We worked at the same company, him a manager. He was my friend and helped me to get rid of my abusive ex.

Had a fling, fell in love.

Grin
TheresLotsOfFarmyardAnimals · 26/03/2014 20:40

Most people meet their spouses at work or the pub don't they?

RiverTam · 26/03/2014 20:40

I have, 3 times. Been with Number 3 for 12 years, he is my DH!

Only unprofessional if you let it be.

There were quite a number of couples where I met DH, I can think of 4 couples, now married with children (it's not a big company, maybe 50/60 people) - 2 couples still work there, in different depts.

mammadiggingdeep · 26/03/2014 20:40

One couple at work have a lovely relationship, doesn't affect their work at all. No problem.

The other couple make themselves look foolish- if they do come out on work drinks they're all over each other. If they argue we all know about it as the guy makes it really.

mammadiggingdeep · 26/03/2014 20:41
  • obvious..

Posted too soon!

JetSetWilly · 26/03/2014 20:48

Thanks for your input

Both single.

On different floors so contact could be minimal if necessary ie Xmas and summer party.

Different teams but equal standing

Got the impression everybody always says no no no - bit unprofessional?

OP posts:
NurseyWursey · 26/03/2014 20:48

Nope go for it.

jayho · 26/03/2014 20:52

I'm sleeping with a colleague, not that we sleep much Grin We're at the same level within our organisation and in different teams with different reporting lines but in the same office. We're both single, consenting adults but neither he or I would like our other colleagues to be aware of our, umm, arrangement. It's private, we're discreet. But, we're sleeping together, not having a relationship. Have to say I would be very wary of having sex with someone who was in a position of power over me or vice versa.

CalamitouslyWrong · 26/03/2014 20:53

Loads of people meet their partner at work. I met DH at work.

babybythesea · 26/03/2014 20:53

At my old place of work it was par for the course. In fact, people tended to be a bit surprised if anyone managed to meet and date someone outside work - it was a kind of standing joke! I can think of four couples, myself and DH included, who are married as a result of meeting there. Loads of people got together and split up (including me with a previous colleague before I got with DH). Again, it was just a fact of working there. It was never a problem because everyone was grown up about it and didn't let it interfere with a working relationship.

NurseyWursey · 26/03/2014 20:54

The days of hotels and posh meals

JetSetWilly · 26/03/2014 20:54

Loads of replies! Oops sorry posted that twice

Ok well something else to add. He's 13 years younger than me.

So I don't imagine either of us are looking for a relationship
Does that change anything?

OP posts:
Fluffycloudland77 · 26/03/2014 20:54

In the motor trade it's virtually compulsory

JetSetWilly · 26/03/2014 20:57

Jayho-sounds like a similar situation then-except probably the age gap Blush

OP posts:
JetSetWilly · 26/03/2014 20:58

Motor trade-my lodger is in the motor trade and was just seeing someone on the quiet in work

There are couples in my office too. But I don't want it to get to that level

OP posts:
puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE · 26/03/2014 20:59

It's ok yes, good idea? Perhaps not.

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE · 26/03/2014 20:59

Just seen your name OP I used to love that game!!