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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My partner has left me and my 2 boys this morning

519 replies

DickCrack · 08/03/2014 09:58

It's been coming a while. 1 shag in 3 years lots if rows. This morning I found loads of dirty texts he sent to another woman. He's gone now. Ds 5 witnessed a lot of my upset this morning. I'm ashamed. What do I do?

OP posts:
Hissy · 30/03/2014 08:12

I know, but try to remember that all of this stuff from him at the moment is showing that it's all about him.

Did he make much of an effort before?

Make your own Mothers Day! Could the boys draw you a MD picture? Go out for a treat of some kind, celebrate the day eith them in some way.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 30/03/2014 12:43

I realise how hard it is to challenge a spouse but a point comes where you have to try something different for your sanity and the sake of your family. It sounded clear from your posts that you were at that point.

Rupertandfifi · 30/03/2014 14:44

I've just read the thread op (doesn't feel right calling you dick)
I get the impression he is keeping his options open - sadly. He isn't prepared to offer his sincere forgiveness, do anything that he can that would help you / him move forward.
He is thinking about himself and his options. I think he does care for your dc so my suggestion would be to only communicate about the dc.
It sounds very difficult for you - you are doing a great job. Hope you manage to have a nice day if you can.

DickCrack · 30/03/2014 21:20

Well I got through today. My mum was good, I got a Mother's Day card and plant from her. We went out for a nice meal and took the boys to the park. He has agreed to financial maintenance at amount I requested. Do u get that in writing? Is it worth the paper it's written on?

OP posts:
DickCrack · 31/03/2014 09:17

Well i asked him to provide me with a written proposed contact schedule and financial maintenance plan. I also asked him to agree to me selling the house. He got hysterical about that telling me I can't move away and it was me that threw him out! Then he arrived here this morning to take kids to school and shouted at me in front of them. It's not going well and I'm still getting panic attacks :-(

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 31/03/2014 10:28

What an utter utter arsehole Angry

In his mind it's all still about him isn't it? And now the cold hard consequences of what he's done are staring him in the face, he's getting angry.

Meet his anger with cool indifference DC. I know you don't feel that but can you act it? Fake it till you make it?

You're doing so well and we are all cheering you on from the cyber sidelines xx

DickCrack · 31/03/2014 10:31

Thank you bit.
Him shouting at me this morning clarified I don't want him back. He's a horrible man.
He is refusing to speak to me now.

OP posts:
LavenderGreen14 · 31/03/2014 10:38

don't speak to him back is my advice - he is a nasty bully. Sorry you are feeling so rotten with panic attacks. Disengage as much as you can from him. And if he tries that trick of shouting in front of DC then shut the door and walk away.

LavenderGreen14 · 31/03/2014 10:40

and him writing down maintenance doesn't mean much tbh - all you can do if he refuses to pay is go down the Child Maintenance Services route and let them deal with it on your behalf.

BitOutOfPractice · 31/03/2014 10:44

Well then he has done you a massive favour this morning then by his timely reminder to you what a wankbadger he is.

Smile to yourself, say "Thank you wank badger!" out loud and know that today has not been wasted Wink

I would go NC if I were you. It will give you a chance to get your head together, it'll give you some peace. And it will have the added bonus of really really annoying Mr Wankbadger as well

mammadiggingdeep · 31/03/2014 10:48

Bloody cheek of him...he cheats on you but then throws in your face that it was you that chucked him out?!

Typical fuckwit behaviour. Please stay detached from it- his shitty behaviour is coming home to roost and he doesn't like it. He left you with no other choice. Just remember that. He made this happen- not you.

Keep strong. Email/text today and tell him that under no circumstances will you have the children upset and he is not to shout in front of them.

Do you have a friend you can go and see today? Don't stay on your own if you're feeling panicky. Talking it through helps. If you fave no one in to today just keep posting here. The panic will pass.

Flowers
mammadiggingdeep · 31/03/2014 10:50

And yes....no contact REALLY helps. Detach from it all. Focus on you and the dc and let him jog the fuck on :)

DickCrack · 31/03/2014 10:50

Thank you everyone. I'm off to meet a friend now for coffee. I will email now and remind him under no circumstances is he to shout at me in front of the children again.

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 31/03/2014 10:51

"Jog the fuck on" Grin

I like it!

mammadiggingdeep · 31/03/2014 11:22

Bitoutofpractice...

Love it...Grin it's the east London in me innit?!

mammadiggingdeep · 31/03/2014 11:23

Dickcrack- glad you're meeting a friend. Keep strong today. Each day is a day nearer to you being out if this hard time on your life. You will be happy again- hold on to that.

BitOutOfPractice · 31/03/2014 11:43

Must be mamma - I will be using it! (I'm not far away - in Essex!)

Hissy · 31/03/2014 11:51

Sweetheart, if you can find a way to calm and centre yourself, breathe and tell yourself that this will pass and you will be OK. What form do the panic attacks take? Is it worth taking yourself to the Drs to see if there is anything they can do to help? If you are reluctant to go down that path just yet, perhaps try Bach's Rescue Remedy in the meantime. it really helped me overcome mild agoraphobia.

Upshot of all this is that this man is trying to get you to do what HE wants, after HE is the one that broke this. If you are going to split, he will have to face the prospect that he needs to formalise money and access, and that the property issue will need to be addressed at some point.

It might be appropriate to state that you have no plans as yet to move (assuming that you are not planning this) but that one way or another, you are not prepared to live in house where he feels it appropriate to enter at his will, or withhold the keys. If he hands over the keys and ceases demanding access (and ranting and raving at you in front of the kids) then the situation will be much more manageable. Ultimately there is a possibility that he can make moves to prevent you from moving too far, but moving far away may not be in the best interests for you all anyway.

Try to find Ice Cold Fury, it's more productive than emotional outburst.

If he rants at you again, close the door. Don't let him enter your home again, have him wait on the doorstep. You do not have to have anyone shouting at you and your DC have the right NOT to see that. Remind him that HE is a grownup, HE is the one that caused this and HE is the one that is refusing to see that for every action, there is a consequence.

Remind him that while HE reckons he could just say 'ho hum, never mind eh?' and put it all behind him if YOU cheated on HIM YOU however find the idea of him getting his rocks off in the back of a car with someone you previously considered a friend as repellant and humiliating. You are entitled to that opinion. Just as he would be entitled to his.

DickCrack · 31/03/2014 17:52

Thanks everyone. Today is quite a panicky day although I'm not too down. I feel like a rising tight sensation in my chest then a bit dizzy and my fingers and toes start tingling. I feel sick too. Had this about a dozen times today. I have been to gp, he mentioned Valium but didn't think it a great idea given I'm on my own with the kids. I'm trying to keep control of it but its horrible

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 31/03/2014 17:58

People who suffer anxiety without any let up know it's exhausting.

Someone I used to work with used Bach Flower Remedies but whether they're okay to take when you're on medication I don't know.

Hissy · 31/03/2014 18:55

As you might imagine, I'm not the hypno/mom/lentil weaver type, but if you can try the flower stuff, as long as you're not going to have issues with other meds, it's worth a go!

I have no idea if it really worked, or if it tricked my head into calming down, but I did calm down, and eventually didn't need to take any.

DickCrack · 31/03/2014 21:15

I think the Bach stuff will be ok, I'm sure I have some in the bathroom cabinet, thank you, I'll give it a go

OP posts:
DickCrack · 31/03/2014 21:16

The evenings are the worst, I want to phone and rage at him every night.

OP posts:
Hissy · 31/03/2014 22:22

I know.

I used to rage at my ex/family out loud at home when all by myself Blush I used to talk/rehearse arguments.

It helped me express my rage/anger without actually doing any real damage.

You have a right to those feelings, if you bottle them up, it'll turn in on you. Talk to us, rant to yourself, cry, whatever helps.

It will get better.

MrsC1969HJ · 01/04/2014 00:55

You're doing brilliantly Dick and reading your thread updates this evening has given me a boost too. I would also like to ring up/email/rage, but realise it is totally lost as at the end of the day "it's all my fault" that he had an affair and left us. They are priceless, they really are. Keep it up chick! :-) x