It is a minority of people that are into BDSM isn't it?

[TheArticFunky]

I'm not into BDSM or anything like that, each to their own but the idea of being spanked doesn't do it for me at all.

Recently I have noticed on Facebook that lots of my friends are implying that they like being spanked or sharing daft BDSM posters.

Do you think they are genuinely into it or is it that they think they should be into it because of books like 50 shades?

I'm starting to think that everyone is at it judging by the Facebook updates.

ArticFunky, most submissives are actually fairly control-freaky IRL. Just sayin'.
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Yup. So nice to be able to relinquish that constant striving for control and just be

If you asked DH he could tell you exactly how he feels about the subspace feeling

Thearticfunky - DH is in control 5 days a week at work, he's the manager and has constant deadlines to work to and people to watch over and he's pretty much anal about things especially about finances, so he is like to give up that control.

Ah, IC. ONly site I've ever managed to achieve a lifetime ban from...

Most of the people on it were lovely, actually (and many were mates of mine in real life) but the site owner...

The one aspect of BDSM that does nothing for me is spanking. I think 50 Shades has a lot to answer for and suddenly there seems to to be an element of...ooh look how naughty I am (yes I have lots of these type of posts from family on FB.

The people I know who are truly into BDSM never mention it

I was banned from ic too. Agree with SGB about the site owner, what a douche

Was everyone banned from that site?! I had heard about it through DH but we prefer the clubs rather than the sites!

Anyone with an opinion was. Dean2001, ms tytania, rubydarling, thedavamp, ravenmuse, monkey, hierophant were just a few who I remember being banned in my time on there

I get that subspace feeling when I'm sat in the Dentist chair - it's not nice.

I feel subspace after birth. DH thinks it's funny to see me all loopy and blissed out... it's weird feeling that way in front an audience of medical staf...

It can't be the same feeling then... I hate the dentist - that lack of control terrifies me, as does most pain - blood tests are my worst nightmare and I've never had a smear cos I am terrified and have a panic attack sometimes just thinking of it. I'm generally a big wimp who is scared of pretty much anything.

This is different. It's complete trust, not having to make any decisions, not being aware of much at all - you can lose time and basically fly It's contentment and relaxation, like having a massage, only... more.

And me, the scaredy cat wimp, can actually ENJOY thibgs that are objectively far far more painful and out of my control than the things I am scared of. I'm actually getting loads braver in day to day life cos I'm learning how to deal with fear.

DP laughs at me, because I will moan and make a big deal of stubbing my toe or a papercut, when under my clothes i am covered in bruises that I am completely happy and proud of.

Britta - See I'm the opposite. DH and I experience different levels, he feel somewhat exactly like you feel. He desperately hates not being in control but when it gets too much he comes to me. We have to be careful on where we mark (among other things). Whereas I like the to have those times of being in control and when he reaches his subspace, I feel elated and high, does that make sense.

It's weird talking about this topic on MN because it's usually somewhat private and especially having other posters open up about it too. Kinda nice, in a way.

NANP - Who are/were you? Want to PM me for a bitching session

I find, very broadly speaking, that BDSM is a bit like horror films/rollercoaster rides etc in that some people just don't 'get' the enjoyment aspect. Not that there's anything wrong with that,of course.

I fucking hate massage. My idea of hell would be a 'pampering' day at a spa. DOesn't mean I think that the people who love massage are sick or peculiar or even boring (presuming it's not the only thing they ever talk about.)

lol @ SGB - see I adore massage, I also adore rope, flogging, spanking, pinching, biting, electricity, hair pulling blah blah blah.
Not sick, just easy to turn on ;)

SGB - I hate them too. Just the thought of some strangers hands running over me all oily makes me shiver and cringe. Now, biting, caning, blood play and Sadomasochism (and many, many more) I adore .

Am I the only one shuddering at the thought of seeing my relatives' sexual preferences posted all over FB? Reading about Auntie Flo's sex life just seems like one step to far into sadomasochism....

Cory - Nope, your not alone! Our friends and family may know but we don't give details! That's just creepy!

Ooooh at the posters banned from IC! I wasn't but I stopped contributing long before it shut down due to it becoming crap.

I have been on and off the scene for about 10 years but I would never post about it on fb or mention it in front of friends/family (though one cousin confronted me about my toy collection that he discovered whilst doing some work on my house - all in good fun and made him laugh).

Just posted on the swingers thread about it, but I now confidently say that I like fetish nights. Or I liked last night, anyway. Bloody marvellous.

Ooh, where did you go? (And BTW where is the swingers' thread?)

you have all intrigued me now lol......no man in my life to corrupt at the mo though .

It's in style and beauty of all places. Called something like 'what does one wear to a swingers club?' and its over 500 posts now, mostly positive, which is lovely.

I'll PM you the club, bit too identifying...

Now that's intriguing! Not into being a swinger though! I'll stick to public showings! Haha.

What a strange place to put a thread but then it is about clothes...

It's kinda gone a bit kinky over there

Yeah... I'd still like to keep some thing private and not list my entire catalog! Haha.

Glad you had a great night Britta and hope your bruises mark how you want them to! . It's been too long since I've had the chance to mark DH and fully enjoy my time with him. Abd with our 20 week olds it's even harder.