Staying DRY

[MrsSippie]

This is a continuation of the last thread DRY We are all doing our best to abstain completely from alcohol.

HURRAH for upbeat and positive!! You really can beat this, Mistress (love the alias btw).

For me, even though I have a decent length of sobriety, it is still imperative that I remind myself how close I am to a drink at any moment; no room for complacency. So keeping those memories fresh and hearing everyone's stories is a massive help in keeping me sober. Thank you one and all.

Just popping in quickly before I get ready for work - Lemondough hope things seem a bit brighter today?

moniker I think my reasons to stop were a combination of many things, mainly the battering my mental health was taking (after a social event last week I was having awful, intrusive thoughts and panic attacks during yet another wasted day hungover and ended up ringing my mum in tears, yet again). I feel like I've been on a self-destructive merry-go-round for most of my adult life and the only way to save myself, in particular for my family's sake, is to try and get off it. I'm also aware of the fact I really don't want to be dishing out "Do as I say, not as I do' advice to my DC in regards to alcohol. Might be a bit late for that, but I feel it's never too late to try and change my life for the better. I realise it's early days for me but I'm trying to focus on thinking as a non-drinker, despite the fact my brain at the moment feels like the Muppet Show debating society,

Hope everyone is having a relatively stress-free Thursday

Hello!

I survived yesterday, slept fitfully last night, went to work this morning (it was touch & go as my anxiety came in waves all the way there but I soldiered on.

Dd is home, she's avoiding me but when our paths crossed an hour or so ago I got a passing fuck off from her so its not time to talk yet. Dh still giving me the cold shoulder too.

Just a quick post for now as in the doctors waiting room with dd2. Thank you for thinking of me

Tough time lemon.
stick it out, stay sober and stay nice . that is all you can do for now.
It's got to be better than drunk, and while you are staying nice and not drinking they can't critise you.
you've said sorry, what else can you do?I hope you dont mind me saying but I'd speak to my daughter, what ever you've done you deserve respect, you are her mum and its your roof shes under and you don't deserve to be spoken to like that.
take care, stay strong x

Thanks stayingdry, I don't think I deserve much respect at the moment, I'll have to earn it over time. However I won't put up with the only communication from her being of the fuck you variety for long. I'll give her a few days & if it doesn't change I'll tell her she's going to have to stay somewhere else until she can be civil. She has some mental health issues which means I cut her more slack than seems reasonable.

Last year dh & I separated (except he never moved out ) & suppose its possible that might happen again. The plan then was for him to move out and take her with him. I'm not beyond suggesting that become a reality. He's using my car as if it were his own atm (he has a motorbike) and I've allowed because guilt & the fact dd won't allow me to be in the same room let alone car, so I've had to walk everywhere today. That stops tomorrow. I'll be nice but I won't let them take the piss.

If we were to separate he would have to get a car, it has been pissing me off for ages that he doesn't which makes the logistics of college runs/work a nightmare whilst he fannies about on his bike. Dd won't use public transport because of a panic disorder.

Anyway, I think I'll have an early night once I've eaten to get away from the negativity in the air. I'll regain my bounce in a day or two.

Hope everyone else is staying sober & sprightly!

Lemon dough just read through the last load of posts and I know exactly what you feel with your daughter. I did the same to my eldest too many times to count. She hated me so much - I screwed up her childhood and ruined half of her teenage years through drink. We can never get it back BUT she has forgiven me now after lots of talking (she's 24) and we have a great relationship. It's awful for you now, but I know it will be ok. Reading what you put made me go cold - almost identical to what we went through. Just wanted to say that I feel for you so much x x

Tough time lemon.
stick it out, stay sober and stay nice . that is all you can do for now.
It's got to be better than drunk, and while you are staying nice and not drinking they can't critise you.
you've said sorry, what else can you do?I hope you dont mind me saying but I'd speak to my daughter, what ever you've done you deserve respect, you are her mum and its your roof shes under and you don't deserve to be spoken to like that.
take care, stay strong x

Sorry, reposted by mistake, and I've not had a wine :)

I am not drinking alcohol for Lent

Just for Lent saints?

I will post more later , big hugs to all who are having a hard time at the moment ( and I dont care if its un-mumsnetty) !

Morning.
Tough night with poorly baby but the sober me can cope much better than the slightly half-cut me, so I'm actually feeling ok.
Just had a very therapeutic 'tipping away all the open, sticky bottles of spirits/liqueurs' ceremony. Baby in my arms throughout, watching me with a very serious look on her face. I think Allan Carr/Jason Vale have got inside my head; all I could think was "that's poison, that is, and it bloody stinks too"
Hope you're all staying strong and feeling the springtime waves of new beginnings.

Hello everyone.

Hope your brain is feeling less Muppet like, SlippedDisco! Sounds like you have done a brilliant thing in terms of your mental health. So often it feels like we have loads of conflicting issues, but once the drink is taken away the picture often looks clearer. In my experience anyway. Or at least it is a million times easier to deal with whatever needs sorting sober.

Great image of you tipping away all that booze, babe in arms, Mistress.
Quite right - bloody poison…. Sorry you are feeling knackered. So true, though, that it is a massive relief not to be doing it with a hangover. And WOW how lovely and spirit lifting it is to feel the warm sun on ankles!

Lemon - hope you are hanging in there. A matter of time and proving yourself, I guess. But the key thing is you are sober now and doing the right thing. There is nothing else you can do so try to be kind to yourself no matter what abuse you are getting from DD (and as you say - her feelings are understandable no matter how painful to hear).

Good to have you back, Sorcha!

I'm a bit excited! we have one of the tickets for the Thorpe Park product test! ds is 14 next Friday and it's Saturday so it's such a treat! Hope all is ok with everyone. Too excited to say too much else

Mistress well done pouring that dirty filth away I read Alan Carr last year and just today I was picturing the alluring bottle or two of wine that was on my mind as pure ethanol, which always makes me shudder and think twice!

MrsSippie what a lovely treat, bet your DS is chuffed to bits!

I'm waiting on a takeaway coming, really struggled today with the 'Friday Feeling' but got over it eventually. It doesn't help that DP is a keen boozer and was sat earlier with a face like a slapped arse at the thought of not having any beers on his Friday night. Took him all of about 30 seconds to go to the shop after I told him I didn't mind if he wanted to drink. The arse. We've been drinking 'buddies' for years and I do wonder how the dynamic of our relationship might change without me joining in with the drinking. Hmmm.

Hope everyone is OK tonight?

Well done pouring the rest of the booze away Mistress. I had the pleasure of that ceremony myself and it's when I knew that was it in my own head and I was committed to not drinking anymore.

Oh wow, that's fantastic Sippie. What a lovely surprise for you and your ds. I love theme parks but unfortunately here is dire for that sort of thing. Wait for it, I bring you Barry's NI's version

Enjoy your takeaway SlippedDisco and just think of the lovely clear head you will have tomorrow.

Stressed out last couple of days here - dc driving me up the wall. Had a lovely chat with an old friend last night that I haven't seen in ages as he's been travelling quite a bit. One of the first people to be really positive and encouraging of all the personal changes I am making rather than taking it as a bit of a joke or getting a 'it'll never last response'. Think he kind of knows how I'm feeling as he had a life change himself a few years ago when he became a Christian. Just pondering a lot about where I fit in now with certain people as I'm not sure I do anymore. That's life I suppose.

Hope everyone's keeping the best and looking forward to a sober weekend :)

My go-to word is obviously 'lovely' tonight

Hi all,
slipped disco, my dp is a real ale fan and friday night is his big night out.to be honest, I quite enjoy it.i generally drop him before I go for the school run, then do what I have to, and fetch him later. Just got back from fetching him now in fact.i get the tv remote, hes very grateful that I fetch him, saves taxi fare, hes had afew so as hes so grateful to me, I take advantage and he promises me something :)
Tonight hes promised me the gazebo I want :) happy days......

Hi everyone
Doing more lurking than posting, but still dry!
Hope you are all having a good weekend, am on night shifts again, this helps with the Friday/Saturday night battle with the booze!
At the moment only my daughter knows I am giving up for good, everyone else has assumed it's a lent thing.....which makes it easier in some ways, but I'm thinking of telling my mum - who lives the other side of the country.
I'm sure she knows, or strongly suspects, I have a problem, and I want to reassure her that I've recognised it too. I know she will support me all the way, my problem is, I don't want to do it over the phone......do you think a letter would be ok, or should I wait til I see her - this will be on Mothers Day, surrounded by extended family that I don't want to share with at the moment?

stayingdry that's a genius idea, must remember that, may as well take advantage if I'm going to have to tolerate him guzzling booze and snoring/farting as a result all night!

Rachel I also work night shifts and find that it helps in advance to know I have at least 2 nights a week that I won't have to wrestle to monkey on my back! I think a letter sounds a good idea if you don't want to tell your mum over the phone, rather than having to try and find the 'right time' with family there. I told my mum, who is very supportive. She doesn't drink at all, never has, but has never been judgy, which helps me now as I'm free to tell her how I'm feeling at every stage of my AF journey.

I had vivid dreams last night that I was smoking and drinking, woke up with a foggy head and panicked for a minute or two that I'd been drinking. Felt such a wave of relief wash over me when I realised I hadn't!

Not sure why I feel so groggy this morning, but I suppose this is what is meant by seeing the hangover to the end and all those will toxins take time to leave my body? Either that or it's my age

Good afternoon all - I hope everyone is ok. Having a v quiet day after last nights excitement! It's sort of becoming normal not to drink now but I must remember to keep fluid s up! I just forget to have anything now I am not glugging booze down my neck non stop!

Struggling a bit with my running - not sure it's still recovering from my operation or just laziness but am still peservering.

I won't give any advice on dealing with mothers a description of mine is upthread! Suffice to say ant mention of my drinking sends her into a self pityingng spin of martyrdom.

Have a lovely weekend.

Just spent the same money I would of spent on todays booze on a football net for my 3 sons, muchmore beneficial, feeling grateful for my sobriety :)

that's the sort of thing that is motivational

Well done us!!:)

Just got back from work, was a successful day, usually I'd grab a whole bottle of wine to celebrate... Not going to lie, pretty gutted I don't have one but tape to the end. I'd drink it, my H would get home, id want to go out, drink more...never ends well.

Lemon dough - I don't know where you live, but if there is an Alateen meeting near you do you think your dd would be prepared to go? It would help her enormously.