The Dating Thread 69

[FolkGirl]

Just because I wanted to be the person to start it really

Welcome one and all.

OldfashionedGirl- with hindsight, I would now BLOCK any men immediately who didn't talk to me in a nice, friendly way. None of that sexist BS this time around for me, thank you very much!

That is a good idea!

I was surprised when one asked me to meet him tonight after sending two messages. It is interesting though!

I had a bit of an OD drama in that I recently met a guy from POF that I actually thought I liked!!!! Excitement!!! And then I realised I didn't like him at all and was repeating the same mistake I made with my ex by falling for the sweet-talking, charming, handsome, lying types. Luckily I caught myself on. Does the 'other' type of guy exist on POF though? (The straightforward, good-natured one?) I fear I may be wasting my time! :-D

It amazes me the amount of guys that ask are you free now ? When you say no .. disappear ! Only after one thing..

Dip you are very patient. If someone asked if I was free now I would BLOCK

It is odd really - I mean it takes me longer than that to make myself presentable!

There seem to be a lot more younger ones on there than I expected.

From now on, I'm only going on dinner dates

Coffee- dreary and sometimes like an awkward interview. I would take cue from the coffee shop they suggest too- if it's a horrible one- no thanks!

Drinks- I find it too easy to be attracted to someone just because of the alcohol

Dinner- this is pleasant. Food is nice, I have more 'going out' clothes than casual and it's a relaxed atmosphere. If you like them, second date is easy. If not, well I intend to ascertain over the phone if I want to do dinner first :-)

Oh I do block now.. I seem to attract 22 yr olds or complete idiots.. I am now considering coming off od for a while !

Yeah I'm considering coming off it AGAIN. Just so busy at the moment and it's time consuming, stressful and I'm bad at choosing them! Sigh. Maybe I'm just not ready for it atm

Hi seeking ...wel all have that trouble falling for the same type of man. its only when we go for something different, we may actually find happiness x

Yeah I'm only interested in the nice ones now. I read the warning signs. At least I'm determined to- whether online or in RL!

dippinmytoe I'm not sure I understand what you mean by them asking if you're free. Surely everyone assumes that everyone is free because you're all on a dating site; no need for them to ask?

I suppose Cynical is locking lips with the boob fancier right about now.

mademan I would assume someone asking me if I was free right now was looking to hook up tonight, not enquiring if I was available to date generally?

Oh I see, as in "are you free, right now this minute?" Yes it could be that; I hadn't thought of it in that way. Blimey, they're hoping aren't they; who realistically is available at the drop of a hat?

I think there are....specialist sites for that kind of thing?

You'd still need to prepare in advance though, rather than be half way through cooking the Sunday dinner and then just run out the door whilst leaving the gas on.

Hi All

Just got back from my date with Mr Bricky. It went well I thought. We had dinner then went to the cinema. Lots of cuddling and hand holding. Not sure how attracted I am to him yet I'm not unattracted, if that makes sense. He's not what you would call good looking facially, mind you I'm nothing special either, but when he took off his jumper in the cinema wow!
He's definately my type body wise. Lovely arms, he's a builder so firm and muscly with a couple of nice tattoos

I don't know if he's on the same wavelength intellectually though or if he might start to get on my nerves after a while. I'm probably over thinking it all though because all in all he seems like a nice guy. He gave me a valentine card:)

We are seeing eachother again on Saturday. I've got a few things I'm worried about though

1/ what Bant said regarding expectation of some men that sex is on the third date. How do I get around this. I would like to wait a bit and he is coming to my town on Saturday, he'll probably think I will invite him here

2/when /if we have sex I have put on some weight and am quite chubby now although I look slimmer in clothes I think. I'm embarrassed especially as he's got the best body out of the last two partners I've had. I've never worried before but this time I am for some reason

3/ when we do have sex what if he loses interest. That really worries me, it's just horrible and makes you feel so used

I sound like a teenager but I suddenly got all these insecurities coming out

Santa Sounds like it went well tonight then. Give it a couple of days for the date to sink in and you might feel even better about Mr Bricky. Sometimes you can feel differently once you've thought things over for a bit and perhaps tomorrow you'll relive the date in your head whilst making a coffee or something and it will all become clearer.

Also, I doubt he's going to be comparing his body to yours, so if he's ripped and you're a bit softer it likely won't matter to him at all. Chances are he will be too excited at the idea of having sex with you (if it goes that far) and not be rating your body parts.

Good luck for Saturday.

I really like him,

Well that's good then, you can spend Valentine's Day in a state of blissful anticipation.

Ooh Jarlin made up for you!! Yay for a bit of dutch courage for Mr Slowburner! So happy for you going to bed with a glowy feeling.

Santa all sounds positive too! Nice touch with the V-day card. Don't worry about the 3rd date = sex thing (and it's not just Bant that thinks that, it's a widely held thing on movies/tv, but not some hard and fast rule for all). It's quite simple - if you don't want to have sex then you don't have sex, and if that puts him off then that's his loss and not your problem. As for feeling chubby - again I really wouldn't worry. After all if he likes you for you, then he'll like the shape you come in, and again, if he doesn't then it's his loss and not your problem.

Wonder how Cynical got on tonight.

So Jarlin what did he sneak up on you unawares whilst you were distracted by the map? Ooh lovely