Does he like me?

[TequilaItMakesMeHappy]

Last week a bunch of us went out after work. We work as engineers and subcontract some of the work to other firms. Some of them came out with us. One of the sub firms always sends the same 2 guys, and they've been working with us for a few years. One of the guys (G1) I'd never spoken to, the other (G2) is very outgoing so always have a bit of a chat and giggle with him.

Anyway, in the pub I was with my friends, and noticed that whenever I looked over in G1's direction he was looking at me. Still didn't really speak much to him as I didn't know him at all. I was chatting to his mate a lot, and we all played pool together.

As people started going their separate ways, G2 announced he was going into town and asked if I wanted to join him and G1. I was having a good night and wasn't ready for going home so agreed.

Once we were out we had a few drinks together, then G2 disappeared to another part of the bar (on the pull!!) and I sat chatting to G1 for quite a while. I don't really remember how it came about, but he was telling me I was stunning, quite a catch etc and, surprised, I rubbished it. He was then really surprised that I didn't see it (drink talking and all that?!!)

Anyway, we carried on talking and our heads were very close together (loud music etc), so he said something and I tilted my ear towards his mouth to hear properly, and as I turned back our noses brushed each others. Next thing, he kissed me. The kiss went on quite a long time and built in passion. We then got more drinks, had a little look for G2 and then went back to sitting chatting and kissed again. It was an amazing kiss, real knee trembler, and given that he says he's shy with women, really knew how to push my buttons! (Btw, I believe him when he says he's shy around women as he was blushing when I first spoke to him that night).

Once back at work, he got my number from a guy I work with, and since then we've text each other a few times a day. We talked about our night out and he said it seemed the right thing to do at the time, but was naughty and he shouldn't have done it. Obviously its a bit of a bad move given we work together.

So I have no idea whether he likes me or if it was just a case of being drunk and convenient. And I know it probably doesn't matter because we work together and it wouldn't go any further, but I just want to satisfy my own curiosity! I could ask him outright, but I think he'd be too embarrassed.

Proper offers is a little more complicated is it not. Strangers in a bar, not many - offers to buy me a drink, lots. Whilst staring at my chest. To me it doesn't count.

People I know, yes a fair few. I don't pretend to be anything special, but I have had a few guys I know asking me out, yes. But again, its different as they know me to a certain extent.

I'm finding this all a bit odd. And I'm wondering why I'm bothering, but...
It's Saturday. Why would you have spoken to him this afternoon - unless it was about work (or did you speak to him to ask if he was married?).
And you've just mentioned he has children... you didn't mention those earlier (I don't think).

He was attracted to you but he is married. Neither of you wants anything to happen??

He had text me about football. I just carried on the conversation and asked him.

Not entirely sure how him having children Changes anything. Married os married!

And I never said he was attracted to me, I asked for opinions on it. But yes, neither of us want anything to happen.

Then why did you post a thread to ask whether he liked you?

Your posts are disingenuous and I don't believe them, Tequila, sorry.

Because I'm not used to just meeting someone and feeling a spark with them in that way. I'm not used to guys I don't know looking beyond my chest. But with booze added in I wondered whether it was just the drink.

You never said the words "he was/is attracted to me".
However, you did say: "but he was telling me I was stunning, quite a catch etc".
I am completely confused as to why you started this thread in the first place.

There's no reason to think he wasn't looking much beyond your chest. He just managed to dress it up a bit with other comments about your appearance, a very convenient subterfuge of 'shyness' and a pretence that he was hanging off your every word because of your insight and witty badinage.

Who mentioned the sick parent first? Because what you were dealing with there was the age-old practice of 'mirroring' where people who fancy eachother like mad pretend to be in exactly the same situation, feeling the same things.

Let it go. You snogged a married man (he left that bit out though!) and now it's time to forget it. I know you said that you were going to, but I think you are making it into something it wasn't. He was a bit of a chancer. That would be my take on it. And he shouldn't figure in your thinking at all. All this, "neither of us want to take things further." That's all wrong. There is no "us" or at least there shouldn't be. You shouldn't be agreeing on things with him. Or texting. Or anything really. Don't dwell on it.

Either way, it doesn't matter much what he saw or thought. He's married so I don't need to think about him like that.

Actually we'd been talking about cars and I said about a pothole that I'd hit really hard on x road. He asked where I was going (it's not exactly on the doorstep) and I said hospital. He quite animatedly said he knew which pothole I was talking about as he hit it himself going to the same hospital. I asked why he was going there (as its not our most local one so quite unusual really) and he told me. I then told him why I was going.

That aside, maybe he does have a technique, maybe he doesn't. It doesn't matter anymore. He is shy though, I see him enough at work without the boost of alcohol to know he's shy.

FFS, for someone with so much boobage, so many friends and so much attention from men, why are you still having this pointless conversation with randoms on t'internet ?

...on a Saturday night

I'm sure you are a lovely person with more than enough friends, you don't need him as another one....I would stop texting him. You say you are not interested but I suspect that's not entirely true as you wouldn't have posted about him (we want to 'share' and talk about people we're interested in......yea?)

If it continues the danger is that you do get too involved and you can do better than that.

Speaking from experience!!! ;-)

But how does he have your phone number?

you sound very braggy and flattered . Instead of going on and on about your boobs you should ask yourself why he thought it was ok to kiss you and text ect. You must have poor boundary and lack of self respect stamped all over you .

What does it matter if he likes you or not? He's married ergo unavailable, so it matters not one jot whether or not he "likes" you.

And the "it seemed the right thing to do at the time" stuff makes him look like a cock. Forget him.

Well yes ok I don't ask guys to put in a formal written request to kiss me. It just happened in the moment, I'd be amazed if it were planned that way but hey ho.

He got my number from another colleague. My number is also my work number as I don't like having 2 phones. A lot of the guys have it for work stuff and we get numbers from each other so there wouldn't be anything weird in him asking one of the lads for my number, they would assume it was for work stuff.

I've already said now loads of times that I won't be texting him any more. I can still be friendly with him at work as I am with most people, but there's nothing to get caught up in and whilst I genuinely don't think he's a sleaze, it doesn't really matter one way or the other.

And no, again, not flattered or happy about it. Not embarrassed either, I just now feel that it happened and that's that. We all move on.

And thanks for the interest in my social life, I did actually go out thanks. But we don't tend to go out til after 10 when it's a bit livelier.

Hah! I was just thinking the same thing, Hogwash!

Tequila - If you haven't posted about these two guys before, saying how the two men fancied a threesome with you (and you might be up for it) ... there's a strong possibility a Mumsnetter has had the pair of them already. (Are they structural engineers?) Or was it you before, with two different men, and you just can't help coming on to your subcontractors?

Have no idea what you're talking about!!! I work with 3 groups of subbies and have done for a few years. Never had any personal dealings with any of em, I mean they come on nights out etc and I'm mates with a few but that's about it.

And no we're not structural engineers!! At the risk of making myself identifiable, I'm a chemical engineer. The guy in question is an electronic engineer.

Ah, good It would be a bit weird if a pair of sleazy engineers were working their way through Mumsnet members ...